Love and Other Disasters
by Aesha
Summary: ‹WIP› Liking a gay man is hard enough without me having slept with said man's lover. And, well, the fact that I am their couples therapist doesn't really help the situation either.
1. the beginning to an end

Warning: Minor adult content and language (profanity here and there), very much OOC, abusive usage of ellipses and em dashes, Prince Charming is mercilessly killed, and author oozes of sadism. But seriously, the story is meant to be _fun—_this doesn't necessarily mean funny :C

Disclaimer: I do not own Card Captor Sakura or its characters; CLAMP does. Also, the story has absolutely nothing to do with the movie. Any resemblance of events or characters to actual persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.

* * *

「L ◦ O ◦ V ◦ E」  
_and_  
«—OTHER DISASTERS—»

.◦.  
_Beta-reader_: **Sakura-chan Master of the Clow**

Chapter 1: the beginning to an end

O—o—x—o—O

O—o—x—o—O

O—o—x—o—O

O—o—x—o—O

When I was four, I tried to sneak out of bed on Christmas Eve to catch Santa Claus. I wanted to make sure that he had gotten me what I asked for; if he hadn't, I wanted to ask him why he didn't. But I was caught by my father before I could reach the bottom of the stairs. Otou-san then told me, "Good things come to those who wait."

And good things did happen. On Christmas morning, sitting under our beautiful Christmas tree was the complete set of Malibu Barbie that I'd desperately wanted.

When I went through puberty I hated how my body was changing. My face was like a home to every zit out there in the world; I felt hideous. I'd tried everything to get rid of them, but I couldn't—nothing worked. I asked my mother what was wrong with me, and she said that nothing was wrong with me. "Your body is changing, it will go away," she said. "Good things come to those who wait."

I waited and, surely enough, my acne went away by the time I got to high school.

Summer of my junior year of high school, my dog Kero died and I'd thought that was the end of the world. Kero was a very important part in my life. Growing up, he was like my best friend. I locked myself in my room and cried for days. My brother comforted me and said, "Kero would want you to be happy. Behind every cloud there's a silver lining. You just have to wait patiently—good things come to those who wait."

And so I waited.

Later in the fall, my mother's sister—who I'd never met before—and her daughter moved into the house next door to us. Mother explained that since her family lived in America, she didn't keep in touch with them much after marrying my father, except for the occasional holiday mail and photos. The day my aunt and cousin moved into their house was also the day I met my best friend for life, Tomoyo.

From that point on, every time something horrible happened to me, I would always wait for a silver lining or something good to happen because I truly believed that good things come to those who wait. So after my first—and second, third, fourth, fifth, sixth, and even seventh—failed relationship I still waited for Mr. Right to come along.

Everyone always said that God listens to everyone's prayers... we only needed to wait. Good things come to those who wait.

And I'd believed that _B-U-L-L-S-H-I-T_ too... until I was proven wrong.

It started with a telephone call from my brother to come over to his house. Actually, it had started with Rika's announcement that she was getting married. And _then_ it was Touya's phone call.

O—o—x—o—O

O—o—x—o—O

It was an autumn day, crisp and beautiful. The air was sweet, invigorating and inviting, and just about perfect for an outdoor wedding. Golden leaves fell and carpeted the ground, every color was vivid and vibrant, as the bride walked down the aisle in her white gown looking perfect, not a thing out of place. And those that still clung to the branches shimmered brilliantly. The groom stood at the altar, in front of the minister, awaiting his bride. A big smile on his face. In his eyes, she was the most beautiful angel he had ever seen, and he saw only her. Any minute now, they would exchange their vows and share a loving kiss before going off and living happily ever after with each other.

The television screen suddenly went black.

"Touya, put that back on!" I yelled at my older brother. "I was watching that!"

He ignored me and went to remove the DVD from the DVD player, carefully putting it back into its case. "Why are you watching my wedding video?" he asked, arms crossed over his chest.

"Because..."

He arched one eyebrow slightly. "Because?"

"Just because!" I said to him. "What? Can't I watch your wedding video just cause I feel like watching it?"

"Sakura, you never '_feel_' like doing something," said Touya. "You _always_ have a reason for doing something. So spill it, kaijuu. Don't tell me you caught the wedding blues again."

Dang it.

"Curse you for being a psychiatrist."

He shrugged. "One of the advantages to the job, I guess. Which one of your friends is getting married?"

I sighed somewhat depressingly. "Rika."

"Which one is that?"

"The one that's been dating our old high school teacher—he finally asked her to marry him. They are having their wedding next month."

"That's kind of short, don't you think?" My sister-in-law walked into the room carrying a tray of refreshments. "One month is hardly enough time to plan the perfect wedding."

Touya grabbed for a cookie and said, "Maybe they aren't looking for the perfect wedding."

Nakuru let out a huff of air. "Preposterous!" She was practically screeching at the top of her lungs. "What girl doesn't want the perfect wedding? Right, Sakura?"

"I have to agree with Nee-chan there. Every girl dreams of having the perfect wedding," I said. "Rika's idea of the perfect wedding, however, is a small ceremony for close friends and family only."

"And, let me guess, you're getting the wedding blues because another one of your friends is getting married and, yet, here you are... still single at twenty-four and moping in our living room."

"You're not helping me feel any better, Nee-chan." I said to the woman.

Nakuru continued to say, "And the ironic part is that you mend people's broken relationships for a living when you've never even been in a relationship before."

"I _so_ have too been in a relationship before!" I cried out.

She smirked and bit into a cookie. "When?"

"I dated in high school and college!"

"I hate to break it to you, Sakura, but I hardly call it 'dating' if your brother chaperones you and your boyfriends on every single one of your dates." Nakuru tried to hold back the urge to laugh.

As much as I loved my brother to death, I couldn't help but start to feel like my sister-in-law was one sad, unfortunate soul. You have to admit that she had married a very possessive and overprotective screwball. A loving, caring man—but still a crazy one nevertheless. Was this what people called _getting a bad deal_?

"I can only pity your baby if it turns out to be a girl," I said to them. "Speaking of which, when can you find out if it's a girl or boy?"

Nakuru began to rub her stomach gently. "We have scheduled for an ultrasound for the week after we come back from our vacation."

"And how long are you going to be gone?"

"A month," answered Touya. "I need you to work with two of my patients while I'm gone. If you can help make better the relationship between them, it will help lessen the headaches I'd get when I come back."

"Oh, heck no!" I shook my head. "If they're bad enough to be giving you headaches, then I don't want them. Ask Kaho-san."

"Kaho deals with rehabilitation. You deal with relationships. Who is the obvious choice I'm going to choose? Besides—" he continued with a smug look on his face, "—I didn't ask you. As your boss, I am telling you to do it. So you do it."

I grumbled under my breath. God, I hated it whenever he played that card to keep me in check.

"The secretary will have their files on your desk on Monday."

"Is this what you asked me over for?" I asked him. "You could've just told me on the phone, you know."

"No, I called you over for _this_." He gripped my shoulders firmly and turned me around so that I was facing him. With a threatening voice that scared me half shitless, he said, "Do not—and I repeat—DO NOT screw this up."

"Y-Yes, s-s-sir!"

"Good. Now go help your pregnant sister pack her things. Pack mine, too."

For some reason, I felt like _this_ was the real reason he'd called me over... or the first thing that had crossed his mind when he picked up the phone to make that call anyway.

"Who is taking you to the airport tomorrow?" I decided to ask.

"Well, mom and dad offered but there's no point in them driving thirty minutes down here to take us," said Touya. "We might just hail a cab."

"I can take you two, you know." I didn't know why I was being so generous. It was just one of those rare moments in life I guess. "It'll save you money, and I know what a money pincher you are."

Touya scowled at me. "Oh, right! Accuse a man of being a money pincher just because he decides to conserve his money wisely. Since when did thinking smart become an unlikeable trait?"

Nakuru snorted rather indelicately in amusement. I rolled my eyes and rose from my seat, heading over to the coat closet and grabbing my jacket. I said, while taking out my car keys, "Whatever you say, Mr. Scrooge."

"For your information, I happen to like Christmas a lot so I can't be Scrooge," Touya retorted. "Where do you think you're going?"

"Uhm... home..." I said. "You didn't think I was stupid enough to pack your things for you, did you?" I waved a little goodbye and blew a kiss at him. "_Mama ain't raised no fool_, bro. I'll come by at eight tomorrow and take you to the airport."

O—o—x—o—O

O—o—x—o—O

Dropping my brother and sister off at the airport the next day had to be the worst decision I'd ever made in my entire life. If I hadn't tried to be a considerate little sister, my life wouldn't have taken a turn for the worst and I wouldn't have met the man responsible for ruining my life.

"Yukito-san?" I was surprised to bump into the man after seeing my brother and his wife off.

"Sakura, it's so good to see you!" the cheery man exclaimed and immediately brought me into a crushing hug. "What are you doing here?"

I pulled back from the hug. "Oh, wow! You've just missed Touya. I saw him and Nakuru off a minute ago. They're going on vacation for a month, sort of like their fifth honeymoon I guess."

"The fifth one, huh?"

"Well, the first four was to ride the baby train. But I can't imagine this one being _stimulating_ for them."

Yukito laughed. "So am I going to have a godson or goddaughter?"

"They're going to find out when they come back from their vacation," I replied. "Are you back temporarily, or are you back for good?"

"For good. I was going to surprise everyone."

"I'm happy to hear that. What are your plans now?"

He smiled. "I plan to open my own restaurant one day, but for the time being, I'll be working as the head chef at Paeonia."

"That's wonderful! So studying culinary arts abroad was definitely the right decision. I'm looking forward to being treated to a delicious dinner cooked by you."

"I'm actually heading over to the hotel right now," he said to me. "The owner wants to try the new recipes from me before adding them to the menu. If you don't have any plans for the day, why don't you come with me and be my tester?"

I giggled. "Like in the good old days? I would love to! Besides, what sane person would turn down free food?"

"Remember the time when you got food poisoning from eating something I made?" he asked as we started walking out of there. "You were in fourth grade, I think, and I was in high school."

"And Touya scolded you so bad for it, too! He even went as far as forbidding me from being your food tester for a whole month."

"He will always be protective of you, no matter what."

"Don't you mean overprotective?" I said. "But his protectiveness of me should somewhat, if I'm lucky, lessen once the baby arrives. Perhaps it's just me being selfish, but I hope the baby is a girl."

Yukito chuckled. "How cruel of you, Sakura-chan!"

"I know, I know," I said. "How are you and Kaho-san doing?"

"What do you mean?" he asked innocently.

I slapped his arm playfully. "Don't you give me that! I saw what you air mailed her for Valentine's. Well, the whole office did... it was _hard_ to miss."

I didn't think the task was possible, but apparently it could be done because Yukito—_somehow_... don't ask me how though—was able to send to Kaho a huge, _very_ huge chocolate sculpture of her favorite flower. That he had made himself. Talk about romantic... or strange, however you want to look at it. Obviously, the sculpture was too much for one woman to eat. Even with three women—Kaho, the secretary, and me—it was still too much, and Touya had even volunteered to help eat the thing. So we ended up calling everyone we knew and asked if they would like some delicious chocolate. We were grateful for Nakuru's pregnancy; because boy... could that pregnant woman eat!

"We're getting there," he said.

I smile wickedly. "And where is 'there' to be exact?"

"Have you always been such a tease, Sakura?" he asked.

"I'm not teasing you," I said. "I'm just being genuinely curious. But you don't have to answer me, your face is so red I'm starting to feel a little bad now. My car is parked right over there."

"Oh, okay. I'll just put my stuff in the trunk. Do you know where the Paeonia is?"

"Who in Tomoeda doesn't? How did you end up getting an offer to be the head chef there?" I asked as we got to the car. I got in and waited for him to put his things in the back.

He got into the passenger seat, fastened his seat belt, and then answered my question, "I met the owner once when I was abroad. He came into the restaurant I was working part-time at, liked what he ate, and gave me his card. I eventually called him back inquiring about the offer—one thing led to another, and well... here I am."

"At least you got to meet the owner," I said, putting the car into gear and pulling out from the lot and onto the road. "I live in Tomoeda and I've never seen his face before, not even in magazines, newspapers, or on television."

"Do you want to meet him or something?"

"Just out of curiosiity... I mean, if you keep seeing someone's name in the paper or hear about it all the time then you would want to know what this person looks like... have a face to the name, you know. You always see this person's representatives and never him," I said. "It drives Tomoyo absolutely bonkers."

Yukito chuckled. "How is she?"

I rolled my eyes. "Same as always—still as nosy as ever, maybe even _more_."

"And Eriol is hanging on tightly?"

I giggled. "I think it's the other way around. They're good for each other though."

"And you, Sakura?"

I took my eyes off the road for a second. "What about me?"

"Do you have anyone?"

I sighed slightly. "Did you have to ask, Yukito-san?"

He smiled comfortingly. "You'll meet someone soon enough."

"It's not that I haven't been meeting people, well, men..." I explained. "I just haven't been meeting men I find particularly interesting... or interesting enough for me to _be_ interested in him. Do you think I'm asking for too much? Tomoyo and the girls tell me I'm being too picky."

"Well, you don't want to be with _just_ anybody, do you?"

"Of course not."

"No, I don't think you're asking for too much," he said.

"Thanks, Yukito-san. You always know what to say."

Yukito had always been like the second brother I never had. He was always there to make me feel better whenever I was down, and he gave me advice during the times in which I couldn't go to Touya for help. I had a puppy crush on him once, when I was still in grade school. It was such a long time ago. I eventually grew out of that puppy love though and started to love Yukito more as a brother than anything else.

"Well, here we are!" he exclaimed in his usual cheery voice when we got to the hotel. The first thought that popped into my mind when I stepped out of the car was, my God, it was HUGE! "Come on. You're going to love the inside even more. I came back last month to check it out before deciding to work here."

"And you didn't bother to visit us?" I feigned hurt.

"It was a really short visit—strictly work," he explained. "So I came by for a quick tour, and it was just amazing."

Amazing was an understatement. The inside of the hotel was breathtaking. One look at the surrounding area and I knew, within a heartbeat, that I couldn't afford to stay there, not even in my next lifetime. The marble floor was so glossy that I could see myself in its sheen, and there were probably hundreds of crystal chandeliers hanging from the high ceiling.

"You haven't seen anything beautiful yet," Yukito said to me with a secretive smile. I was about to ask him if he was kidding me, but before I could say anything, he'd already pulled me along after him.

"What do you want to show me?"

"You'll see," he said as he dragged me down this hall and that hall and another hall and another.

"What is it though? You know I don't like being in suspense." I was growing impatient—well, I'd never been a very patient person anyway. "And how many more halls do we have to go through?"

He smiled when we came to a big wooden double door. "This," he said, "is the most beautiful sight you will ever see."

He pushed the doors open... and I fell in love at first sight. Beyond my view was the most beautiful garden seen by man. It was like a little world of paradise, like a re-creation of the Garden of Eden—except less religious meanings, no naked man and woman, you get the point. Bottom line: I wanted my wedding, whenever that was going to be, to be held there.

"This is perfect," I said.

"I know, isn't it?"

"Imagine my wedding being here! It's perfect!"

"Yes, it is perf— W... wait... what? Wedding? What wedding?"

"Well, it's always good to plan ahead."

Yukito chuckled. "I guess you better start saving up then. It's quite expensive from what I hear."

"Don't I get a discount for knowing an employee or something?" I said.

"Come on. Let's go to the kitchen," said Yukito. I was reluctant to follow him; not wanting to leave my dream wedding location quite yet.

I could practically see the big day before my eyes as if it was just tomorrow. God, I wanted it so bad.

O—o—x—o—O

O—o—x—o—O

"You know..." I said to Yukito, watching him prepare the food. "For such a beautiful hotel, they sure have a mediocre kitchen."

Yukito and the other kitchen staff laughed at what I said.

"You think so?" he asked.

"Yes. Isn't the kitchen supposed to be like the castle to a chef or something? You should definitely complain to the owner, Yukito-san. You deserve a five-star kitchen."

"What makes the kitchen five-star is the chef." He smiled. "Not the equipments."

"You and Otou-san say the same thing."

"That's right. If your father hadn't become a college professor, he would be a cook today."

I said, "Well, you know how he is. He likes to cook, but not as a profession."

Someone then came into the kitchen and said, "Tsukishiro-san, Yue would like to speak with you in his office."

Yukito seemed to be alarmed and quickly stopped what he was doing. "I'll be right back, Sakura," he said to me in a solemn tone; almost as if he was telling me to stay put in the kitchen—or else.

"Do you think he's in trouble for bringing me along today?" I asked one of the other chefs in the room once the two had left.

"No, hun," said the red haired woman next to me. "My guess is that it probably has something to do with Syaoran."

"Syaoran?" I asked.

"The most delicious thing you'll ever set your eyes on," the woman said with this strange sort of laugh. The hungry look in her eyes did not go undetected. "Mm-hmm! If I can have that sweet thing for every meal, I won't go back to eating normal food again."

The men in the room rolled their eyes, some snorted and some started choking.

"You keep on dreaming!" one of them hollered out from across the room. "It'll be another lifetime before he sets eyes on you."

The bald man, who Yukito had introduced to me earlier as the sous chef, snickered. He added, "Or ANY woman, for that matter."

The woman from earlier threw a piece of vegetable at him. "Don't listen to him, dear," she said to me. "They don't know what they're talking about—it's all rumors, I assure you."

"Rumors that have not been denied _or_ disproved," the bald man said. He then gave me a slight wink. "You know what they always say..."

I looked at them, being somewhat—no, _absolutely_ confused. "Uhm... what do they always say?"

Everyone exchanged secretive glances at each other and then they all started to giggle amongst themselves while looking sideways at me. I felt like I was the center attention of some inside joke that I was not getting. Well, it was pretty obvious that I didn't get what they were saying. How was I supposed to know what 'they' always said?

There are A LOT of things that 'they' always say. How was I to know which of those hundreds of millions and billions of things they were speaking of?

"Hey, Jin-san, has Yukito arrived yet?" Suddenly a very handsome man walked into the kitchen. He had tan skin, nicely shaped body, and straight, white teeth. Ooh and his eyes! Oh, his absolutely amazing amber eyes that complimented his chocolate brown hair oh so nicely. He was wearing black pants and a button down light-blue shirt. I just stared at him blankly, not knowing what to do or say.

"Yeah. You're a little late, Syaoran," said the sous chef with a chuckle. "Yue called him in already."

"That son of a mother fucking bitc—" He stopped abruptly when everyone in the room pointed me out to him. He glanced my way and smiled; a faint tint of blush on his cheeks and the cutest dimple on his right cheek. "Pardon my French."

He then quickly left the room.

Even his back view was damn captivating.

"That was him?" I asked, letting out the breath I hadn't realized I'd been holding.

The red haired woman smiled and patted my shoulders slightly. "Didn't I tell you he was delicious?"

"Yeah..." I nodded my head in agreement. However, I wasn't so sure 'delicious' was the word I'd use to describe the man.

_Be still my beating heart_, I had told myself.

O—o—x—o—O

O—o—x—o—O

"I found him," I told my best friend on the phone later that day when I got home.

"Who?" Tomoyo asked back.

"The man of my dreams," I answered.

She squealed excitedly on the other line. "NO WAY! Tell me everything! What is his name?"

"Oh, I guess before I tell you anything I should tell you that Yukito is back. I dropped Touya and Nakuru off at the airport today and bumped into the man when I was leaving," I said to her. "He's working as the head chef at the Paeonia, and today I went to taste test some of his new recipes for him. And well, Yukito was summoned by the owner, and then _he_ came looking for Yukito."

"And who is _he_?"

"Li Syaoran aka my Adonis."

Tomoyo laughed. "I have to meet this man then! And how did you know that he's the man of your dreams?"

"I can't describe it, but I've _never_ felt anything like this before... with any _other_ man actually. I know I've always said love at first sight is so silly..."

"W-Wait—_love_, Sakura? Did you say 'love'?"

I paused for a second to think it over. "Well, I can't say that it's love _love_, but you know what I meant to say."

"Are you going to see him again?"

And her question brought me back to the harsh reality. How was I going to see Syaoran again? Go bother Yukito at work every day? That wouldn't work at all. For one thing, I had my own job. Speaking of which, starting on Monday, I needed to take care of Touya's patients, one thing I did not look forward to. Secondly, showing up at the hotel didn't necessarily mean I was going to see him.

"I don't think so," I said sadly.

"Look on the bright side," said Tomoyo, "if you do see the man again, then you'd know for sure there's some kind of destiny at hand going for you."

"Well, there's still that optimistic outlook, isn't there?"

O—o—x—o—O

O—o—x—o—O

Monday morning started out like any other day weekday.

7:15 AM—Wake up and get ready for work

7:50 AM—Eat breakfast

8:25 AM—Go to work

8:40 AM—Make coffee, then chit chat with the secretary and Kaho-san

9:00 AM—Login to Facebook

9:30 AM—First patient for the day

Well... I was _supposed_ to meet my first patient for the day at 9:30 AM every single day. It was an unwritten rule. I looked at the clock in agitation. 9:51 AM. They were twenty-freaking-one minutes late. How did they ever survive high school or college with their sense of time being like this?

A knock came at the door.

"Sakura-chan." The secretary poked her head through the door. "The patients have arrived."

_Finally_, I thought in my head.

I was about to log off Facebook and exit out of Windows Media Player when the door opened again, and walking into the room were two men. Two drop-dead gorgeous men—one of which was the supposedly 'man of my dreams' from the day before. My body froze as my brain tried to sort through all the different information that was running through my head.

_Oh, God_... and the worst thought hit me hard in the face.

_I'm a couples therapist_, I reminded myself.

Most people have a vague idea of what the notion of "being gay" means. My moment of enlightenment came courtesy of Robbie Williams.

According to the lyrics of the song that was currently playing on my computer at that very moment, "all the best women are married and all the handsome men are gay."

* * *

«—**To be continued**—»


	2. misery loves company

「L ◦ O ◦ V ◦ E」  
_and_  
«—OTHER DISASTERS—»

.◦.  
_Beta-reader_: Sakura-chan Master of the Clow

chapter 2: misery loves company

O—o—x—o—O

O—o—x—o—O

O—o—x—o—O

O—o—x—o—O

"Where is Touya?" the man I didn't know asked. He didn't look pleased to see my face. I didn't care. But, good Lord, he was the paradigm of human perfection. If I'd thought Syaoran was Adonis before, I ain't seen nothing yet. Well, until then anyway. The man had long, silver hair that flowed down his back like velvet silk and came down to centimeters below his waist. He carried no expression on his face as he sat down across from me, but his whole presence demanded respect and attention. His eyes looked at me as if they were piercing through my soul.

No doubt about it.

He was the most attractive man I'd ever seen in my entire life—even more attractive than Syaoran, as much as I hated to admit it—though there was something _cruel_ about him. Not calling him an evil person or anything. Just that I could sense this dangerous aura from him—definitely someone you don't want to mess with. First example, he'd walked into my office without greeting me or introducing himself first. Secondly, he'd sat down before I had even invited him to have a seat. Normally, a person would wait until they are told to have a seat. His actions had told me a lot about him before our session even started. For one thing, he was used to having authority. He wasn't someone who would wait for other people to tell him what to do; in other words, the act itself was unacceptable to him.

I quickly turned off my computer.

"My brother will be gone for a whole month," I answered his question politely. "He has asked me to work with you while he is gone, so I will be your temporary therapist."

"You're the one from yesterday!" Syaoran smiled. "Sorry again for yesterday. Not the best first impression to give your shrink, I guess. I'm Li Syaoran, by the way."

I smiled back. "I didn't know you were going to be my patient until two minutes ago when you walked through that door. Nice to meet you, Li-kun. My name is Kinomoto Sakura, and I'll be your therapist—not shrink, _therapist_. And you must be—" I looked at the other man, still smiling. But after a few seconds of awkward silence and coming to the conclusion that the man had no intention to introduce himself, I started to look through the pile of paperwork on my desk for their files, which was supposed to be there. Ah-hah! Found it. "—Yue."

...That was it.

No last name. No nothing? Written on the front cover of the folder was just that one word: Yue.

W-Wait... Yue? ... As in Yukito's boss, the mysterious owner of one of the largest hotels in the country that no one had seen the face of—_that_ Yue?

The man grunted.

"Okay. Just what is your damn problem?" I asked as politely as I could.

Both he and Syaoran looked at me in amusement. "Pardon me?" he asked.

"You heard me," I said in a sharp tone of voice. "What is your damn problem? You've been giving this haughty attitude ever since you walked through that door. What did I ever do to you?"

Syaoran chuckled. "You'll have to excuse him. He's always cranky for our sessions because he has to wake up three hours early every time. That is why we ran a little this morning."

Because the freaking prick didn't get enough beauty sleep? Did he even need beauty sleep? Damn it. He was already freaking drop-dead gorgeous.

_God... life was so unfair._

"What time does he usually wake up then?" I asked.

"Noon."

"No such thing as too much beauty sleep, huh?" I forced out a laugh, but then went silent. Uhm, talk about awkward. "I guess we should get down to business. Today's session, I thought I should get to know you two better before we get to the real deal."

"The real deal?" Yue arched his eyebrow slightly.

"Oh, you know. The fun stuff."

"...'The fun stuff'..." he said, still looking at me. "Do you happen to have Touya's personal contact number?"

"I do. Why?"

"I would like to call and ask him—" He slapped the desk with his hand. "—JUST WHAT THE HELL WAS HE THINKING!"

And that was the last straw for me.

I slapped the folder down hard on the desk. I tried to refrain myself from giving the man a glare... or cussing him out. It wasn't professional. That was what I needed to be—professional. Because I was a professional.

"That's what I would like to know too. You know what? Why don't we call him?" I said. "From what I can tell so far, you aren't too happy to be working with me, and neither am I. I don't need, nor do I want, to work with someone who is incapable of being civilized to another person and acts like HE HAS A FREAKING STICK UP HIS ASS!"

Then the door opened and Miko, the secretary, was standing there with a concerned look on her face. "Is everything okay, Sakura-chan?"

"Yeah... yeah, everything is just fine!" I put on a smile.

"No, everything is not fine," Yue said.

I gave him the evil eye. "Why don't you just shut up? I say everything is fine so everything is fine!"

"I want to speak with Touya," he said to Miko, completely ignoring me. "I do not accept this arrangement he has made."

"Syaoran has no problem with it, why should you?" I scoffed at him.

"He was Li-kun a moment ago, and now he is _Syaoran_?" The man smirked.

Insufferable jerk.

Syaoran had just been sitting there... all this time... smiling and watching in amusement.

"Miko, see them out," I said, "before I start seeing red. Give him Touya's cell phone number and let him complain to his heart's content."

Yue grunted and followed Miko without so much as a gaze my way. I slumped back in my seat and groaned in frustration. Really. People didn't lie when they said appearances are deceiving.

"OH! That... that—that _JERK_!" And I did the unthinkable. I fed his files into the paper shredder. "God, that feels good."

If only the folder was the real thing.

"He can be a pain at times," said Syaoran.

I'd almost forgotten about him. I willed down the blush on my face and said, "I can't imagine what it's like with him for you."

After all, he was the one who had to deal with a man like _that_ as his lover.

"I manage. So you're Touya's little sister?"

"Don't believe anything he says," I said. "It's not true one bit. I did not wet my bed in the fourth grade, and I am not a lesbian."

Did I forget to mention that my brother sometimes told guys he met that I was a lesbian so that they'd forget about chasing me? Yes, story of my life.

Syaoran laughed. Oh, God... a woman could get used to hearing that beautiful sound. "Really? I thought it was kind of hot."

Coming from a gay man.

"So... _gay_ turns you on?" I asked carefully.

He laughed. "I think your brother is hot, but he doesn't turn me on."

"But he's not gay."

"_Oh,_ he's not?"

"I... don't... think so."

Suddenly, he started to laugh uncontrollably. It was as if I'd missed something. Did I miss something? I don't _think_ I did.

"It was nice meeting you. I'll see you Wednesday, Sakura. Well...?"

"Well?"

He flashed me this really, really cute smile. "Aren't you going to shake my hand? It's customary, isn't it?"

"Oh!" I quickly shook his hand. "It was nice to meet you, too."

He suddenly grabbed my hand and kissed the fingertips, mesmerizing amber eyes sparkling, and said, "The pleasure was all mine."

"I think I'm going to puke." Yue was standing at the door. He gave me this look I didn't quite understand. He then said to Syaoran, "I don't like what you were doing with her."

Protective lover on the rampage maybe?

Syaoran let go of my hand and smiled. Waving a quick little goodbye, he walked over to Yue and gave the man an assuring squeeze on the shoulder. "Relax," he said. "I was just being polite."

Surprisingly, the frown on Yue's face disappeared. And I saw a small smile gracing his lips. A very _tiny_ small, but still a smile. Then the two of them walked off together, while exchanging some sort of conversation with each other.

They looked really good together. When they stood next to each other, it was like the most perfect picture—God's masterpiece.

What woman could compete with _that_?

_Dang it._

"Life is so unfair," I said to myself.

O—o—x—o—O

O—o—x—o—O

"So in this situation, who would you say Yue is: Jaejoong or YunHo?"

I almost choked on my lunch. "Tomoyo!" I shrieked, reaching across the table to slap her in the arm. I was having lunch with the girls on Tuesday. It was just this thing that we did, you know, to keep our friendship going strong. We would keep each other up to date on the stuffs that were happening to us. The girls and I met up every day to have lunch together. But I couldn't make it to our lunch meet on Monday because a _certain_ patient of mine couldn't wake up early to get the stick out of his ass and caused me to be behind schedule so I had to have my lunch at the office.

I was telling them about what had happened on Monday morning with Yue and Syaoran. They didn't believe me at first when I told them that I met the owner of Paeonia. It took five or ten minutes of convincing until they'd finally believed me... and then I told them that he was a jerk. A super-hot dickhead.

"What? It's the best example I can come up with!" the girl said in defense. Tomoyo may not look like it, but she is a die-hard fan Kim Jaejoong and Jung YunHo.

"Oh, Yue is definitely Jaejoong," I said. "Too good looking for words."

"If you say Yue is Jaejoong and it's YunJae, _not_ JaeHo—hate to break it to you, Tomoyo—then are you implying that Yue plays the bottom role?" asked Chiharu.

I shuddered, trying to picture Yue being the submissive one. "That is so wrong. His whole presence practically screams out dominant, so he can't be the submissive one. I guess he's Jung YunHo then."

"Why can't it be JaeHo?" said Tomoyo. "You don't know if it's YunJae or not. Why does YunHo get to be dominant just because he seems more masculine?"

"It just doesn't feel right," I said.

"Finally!" Tomoyo gave me two thumbs up. "Good for you, Sakura! Someone finally agrees with me."

"No, I meant to say it just doesn't feel right with Yue being YunHo in this situation. He doesn't fit as Jung YunHo." I found myself being hit in the face by a french fry. "HOE! What was that for, Tomoyo?"

"Traitor." The raven haired girl pouted. "I don't care what nobody says—it's JaeHo!"

Naoko rolled her eyes. "It doesn't exist—JaeHo, YunJae, or whatever you're fighting over."

Chiharu and Tomoyo gasped in shock. "Then how do you explain—" They suddenly pulled up the websites and forum topics dedicated to the 'relationship' between the two Korean idols on Tomoyo's iPhone. "—THIS! Look. There are pictures and everything!"

"Simple," said Naoko. "There's a word for that, and it's called FANSERVICE. Need a dictionary?"

"Actually... it's not in the dictionary that I use," I said. "I went to look it up."

Three pairs of eyes looked at me as if I was crazy.

"Well, at least I'm not the one sitting here discussing some celebrity's sexuality," I told them. "You would think you three would've gotten over this whole thing already. It's been like, what, over six years? Tomoyo, you thought they were gay the minute you saw their first video on the internet. Chiharu, you were brainwashed by her into believing the same thing. Of course, it took her like eight months to do it, but she actually did it. And you, Naoko, well... you just hate men. Any worshipping or moderate admiring of men, in your eyes, is pathetic."

The girl shrugged her shoulders slightly. "Well, it's true. Women are way better than men. We start walking at an earlier age, we speak earlier, and we are smarter, cleaner—in conclusion, better."

Well, who was I to argue with that? She was right. It was blatantly obvious that women were and had always been the better of the two. After all, the male's Y chromosome was nothing more than a defective X chromosome missing one of its legs. Hadn't that said enough?

"Speaking of men," Naoko continued, "Sakura, do you think I can borrow that black garter you have? The one with the lace."

"For someone who hates men with a passion, you sure don't mind sleeping with them." Tomoyo giggled. "Who's the poor soul this time?"

"Just because I dislike them, it doesn't mean I don't appreciate their one usefulness," replied Naoko with a smile. A wicked smile indeed. I felt sorry for the male population, I really did. "So can I?"

I shrugged my shoulders. "Sure. Why not?"

She leaned over and pulled me into a tight hug. "Thank you, thank you, thank you! You're the best!"

"I'll bring it over after I get home from work," I said. Looking at the time, I quickly chugged down the rest of my soda and grabbed my things. "HOE! Why didn't anyone remind me of the time?"

"Rika is the one that usually keeps track of the time for you," said Chiharu. "But she's not here today, and you know how careless the three of us are."

I rolled my eyes. It was great to know I had such thoughtful friends to rely on.

I was the only one that had to worry about making it back to work on time because, unlike my friends, I worked for somebody. Despite the fact that that '_somebody_' was my own brother, he would still cut my paycheck for being late (in the morning or coming back from lunch) or leaving early without completing official paperwork ahead of time. Being the lucky ones, my friends didn't have to worry about such trivial matter.

Tomoyo was a famous fashion designer. She wasn't like Christian Dior, Frida Giannini, Giorgio Armani, or Yohji Yamamoto kind of famous; but occasionally people would still recognize her on the streets of Japan. Not to mention her yearly income had like eight freaking digits. Her husband, Hiiragizawa Eriol, was pretty well off and brought home some good bucks as a divorce lawyer. In other words, she was set and needed not to worry.

Chiharu, though jobless, didn't need to worry about getting one either. Her husband was the president of a big printing company. Most of the things people picked up to read were published by his company. And he also ran a popular gossip magazine—_None of Our Business, Only Yours_.

Naoko opened up a nightclub after she'd struck oil from a fire hydrant, because she thought it would be a good investment, considering all the horny men and teenagers out there in the world (even in a country like Japan). And boy was she ever right. Her club was the most popular hangout in Tomoeda. It was even named as one of the top must-see entertainment attraction for tourists by some foreign columnist who had come here on a vacation. She still had that article framed on the wall of her office. Just in case you're wondering—no, I wasn't being serious when I said she struck oil from a fire hydrant. If she did then I would've been wondering through every street of Japan and knocking down every fire hydrant in sight. Actually, she won the stupid lottery. But I still told people she struck oil from a fire hydrant—it was more exciting that way, and you would not believe the number of people who would actually believe me too. Yup. Definitely more exciting that way.

And we're down to Rika. Her grandpa died and left her a fortune. Need I say more?

All four of my grandparents died, but they left me their love and best wishes in life, not their cash. My mom grew up in a rich family, but she left wealth and fortune behind when she married my dad, who was from a poor family. Growing up, both my brother and I had to work for money. Our parents didn't just give us money whenever we asked. We had to mow the lawn, wash the dishes, do the laundry, clean the bathrooms or gutter before our parents would give us money. We didn't have a college fund set up for us either. I had to work my butt off in high school to make sure I'd gotten a scholarship for college.

Since I'd been through hell, basically, it's natural to think that I am going to treat my own kids better... don't make them go through what I did, right? No. I was going to make sure they go through the same hell I did, or worse.

I was starting to see the hype of being parents already. (Insert evil laugh).

Ahem. _Anyway_...

So, yeah—after leaving the restaurant, I hurried back to the office. Well, _tried_ to hurry anyway but the traffic was just plain awful.

"Is it possible to go any faster?" I asked the cab driver.

"No can do," he answered. "For some reason, there are traffic jams just about everywhere today."

I groaned. Not good.

Maybe I should have driven my car to lunch or something, because whenever I was driving on the road, the other drivers would avoid me. Not sure why that was though.

"Thanks, Mr. Cab-driver, but I think I'll make it on foot from here," I said, handing him the money.

I got out of the cab at a corner and started walking... well, more like _running_ in my shiny, brand new pair of architectural heels. It was not a day at the beach.

I looked at my watch. "Ten more minutes. Oh, screw my image."

I bent down and took off my heels. After stuffing them in my purse, I took off running, barefooted. I received some weird stares from people, but I didn't care. The only think I'd cared about at that moment was my time card. I wasn't going to let my paycheck be cut off—_again_. You'd think there would be some sort of 'benefits' being a Kinomoto and working at the _Kinomoto _Private Psychiatry Office... but no... there was none.

Seriously, countries that call themselves democratic, or advocate 'equality for all', should set us as their role model and follow our example. We were the _beacon_ of equality... well, at least Touya was anyway. _Curse him_.

So I was running; so absorbed into the fact that I didn't want to be late, I didn't care about the crossing lights or anything like that. I'd just ran across the street and dodged the moving cars as best as I could. I successfully crossed a street or two, unscratched. But when I was crossing the last street to get to the office building, I almost got hit by a car.

Don't you just hate that?

When you almost reach your goal, something unexpected happens to ruin that moment. Life can be such a bitch.

There was no way I could make it back to work on time. No way in hell.

My day just couldn't get any worse.

"Sakura? Oh my God! Are you okay?"

That voice...

Just when I thought I was at the bottom of hell, God proved that he wasn't a bad guy after all. He could be quite nice and giving when he wanted to be. So there I was, sprawled on the pavement, on my butt... barefooted... and coming out of the car was the man of my every desire.

Syaoran lent me a hand and helped to pull me up. "What were you thinking crossing the street so recklessly?"

"Trying to beat the clock to work," I said. "Late from lunch."

He let out a short chuckle. "You too?"

"What do you mean? Don't tell me you're late to work from lunch, too. No way!"

"Yeah, Yue is going to kill me."

God. Hearing that man's name almost ruined my happy hour. Keyword: _almost_.

"Oh, you work at the Paeonia hotel also?"

"You can say that," he said. "Are you hurt anywhere? Should I take you to the hospital?"

"No, no, no. I'm totally fine."

"You sure?"

I gave him an assuring smile. "I'm fine, I promise."

"Okay, if you say so, because I don't want to end up being called the guy who almost cruelly ran over his shrink."

I laughed at his sense of humor. "Therapist," I quickly corrected him though.

"What?"

"I'm a therapist," I said. "Not _shrink_."

"Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to offend you."

I gave him a small shrug. "I just don't like to be called that because the term is technically incorrect. Touya would be considered a shrink, but not me. I'm more of a counselor."

Syaoran nodded his head from time to time, but I knew he didn't get a damn thing I said. Most people don't know the difference between a therapist, psychologist, and psychiatrist anyway. I'd gotten used to it by now, so I wasn't too bothered.

Our _nice_ conversation was interrupted by the ringing of his cell phone. "What?" he answered, begrudgingly. "Yeah, yeah. I'll be there right away."

He hung up the phone and said, "Well, I guess I'll see you later. I'm really sorry about almost running over you."

"No, it was partially my fault anyway," I said, as sweetly as I could. "I'll see you first thing tomorrow morning, if nothing gets changed."

He gave me another one of his oh so freaking dreamy smile and got back into the car. I watched as he drove off. "Why does he have to be gay?" I sighed to myself when his car turned around the corner and disappeared out of sight.

Seriously... why?

That's one question we women would like to ask the gay men, but never had the courage to do because (1) the truth would be too unbearable and (2) we didn't really want cold water splashed in our faces. No woman wanted to hear about their little flaws. Even men were the same. That was something I'd learned from years of counseling couples.

O—o—x—o—O

O—o—x—o—O

When I got home from work that day, I received the worst phone call of my life. Well, it was a message left by my brother, on my home phone. He said:

'_Sakura, what did I tell you before I left? I told you not to screw this up, didn't I? Apologize to him for your behavior yesterday the next time you see him. I know what an ass Yue can be, but you suck it up and deal with him. Call a truce or some little shit like that. I don't care what you do in this one month—but if I come back and I find out that I've lost my richest client, there will be hell to pay, dear sister. And I mean __**hell**__. By the way, I heard you were late to work coming back from lunch today. Don't think you can slack off just because I'm gone, Sakura. You have to follow the rules like everyone else. If Kaho and Miko can follow the rules that I've set, why can't you? I'm telling Miko to dock off from your paycheck. Learn from your mistakes, Sakura, so I don't have to punish you every time. By the way, just 'cause I'm gone for a month, don't stay out too late. Trust me, I will know if you've been out partying every night. Don't forget to take good care of yourself and eat healthy. Eat at least five different colors a day. No junk food after nine. Don't eat a lot of sugar for breakfast either. Do your laundry every week. Don't wait until it piles up, because I won't be there to come over and do it for you. Remember to wait at least an hour before going to sleep after eating, and don't_—'

"End of message," said the machine. I pushed the button for the next unheard message. "Tuesday XX, 2012. 7:49 PM."

'—_forget to floss. Bye, love you. And call me A-S-A-P_.'

"End of message."

...No comment.

But I eventually picked up the phone and called my brother back. I didn't want him to think I'd been kidnapped or gone missing (or something similar to those things). After spending like an hour on the phone with him—promising I would behave with Yue, be more responsible at work, take good care of myself, yadda yadda yadda—I was able to give him the slip by telling him that I was going to meet up with the girls for a girls movie night. He believed me, thankfully, with the help from my sister-in-law.

So I found the garter that Naoko had wanted and skedaddled over to Amazon, Naoko's nightclub. Leave it to Naoko to pick that for her club's name.

Naoko was sitting at the bar and talking to this blond haired man, who was quite cute, might I add. Poor guy though. His luck was just that bad to have been Naoko's target.

"Sakura!" She became strangely excited when she saw me entering the club. "Did you bring it?" she asked as soon as she came up to be.

I nodded and showed her the bag I was holding. "The best of the best. Do you have the cash?"

Okay... it sounded like we were drug dealing or something, but Naoko usually gave me cash as collateral whenever she borrowed my clothes—undergarments to be exact—just in case something happened to them. You never know what might happen. There can be all sorts of _accidents_ for all you know.

Naoko quickly handed me a few bills and said, "Watch the place for me, will you?"

And that was the last I saw of her that night. So I was given the job of watching over her club. Joy... Lucky little me.

There I was—stuck watching strangers hanging out the club, drinking, dancing, and making out like crazed monkeys—wishing that I hadn't gotten roped into this in the first place... and BAM! There _he_ was! Walking out from one of the private rooms, looking like he was the hottest thing since David Beckham.

Piercing eyes locked with mine as if by instinct, and he smirked, taunting me I'm sure.

"That _bastard_!" I said when he turned his head away and started talking to the man that had come out from the room with him. "Shun, does he come here often?" I asked the bartender.

"Who?" I pointed over to the jerk. "Oh, you mean Yin?"

I was confused.

"Yin," he said the foreign name again. "The hottie with the silver hair over there."

"Why do you call him Yin?" I asked.

"Believe me when I say countless people have tried to ask for his name," said Shun with a grin. "All failed. I asked if he was of Chinese descent; I can tell my own kind, being part Chinese and all. I then nicknamed him Yin, for his silver hair. You know him, Sakura?"

"You can sort of say that... Give me a tot tequila sunrise, would you?"

I watched as he made my drink in just seconds. I was beyond impressed. Don't know how bartenders do it, but they do it just perfect.

"So does he come here often?" I asked, taking a sip of my drink.

"He comes here occasionally, but it's all for business discussions only. Usually goes into a private room and then leaves. Not much is known of him actually. He was boss-lady's conquest once, but she gave up after a month of failed attempts."

I snorted; almost shooting alcohol out of my nose. "Naoko tried to shimmy down his pants?"

I burst out laughing. It was too hilarious. Gods, for someone who hated men, she sure knew how to pick them. Of course, the only good thing about Yue was his looks.

"He's coming over," Shun suddenly mouthed to me, quietly.

I panicked. What did he mean '_he_' was coming over? Over... over where? Like over where I was sitting, or just over to the bar in general?

"I didn't expect to see you here." And I heard his voice over my shoulder.

I could almost sense his presence over my shoulder... Actually, I _felt_ his breath brushing against my left ear, which could only mean one thing: he was bending over and whispering into my ear. _Ooh... shit_, was my first thought.

"I can say the same—" And I made the stupid mistake of turning around to face him because I found our faces really, _really_ close together. I gazed into his eyes, suddenly feeling a loss for words; then my gaze fell to his lips. I gulped.

"You were saying?" he said with a hint of mockery.

I straightened up and looked away quickly, composing myself together again. "I said, I can say the same thing to you..." And, at that moment, I felt a little _daring_... so I added, "_Yin_."

Yue seemed startled at this. Then he smirked, his eyes taking on that challenging glint that made my already apparent uneasiness of the situation I was in grow. "Let me buy you a drink," he said.

"No, no," I tried to say ever so politely. He was tricking me, I'm sure of it. "It's okay."

"She gets free drinks anyway," Shun said for me.

I looked at the man with big puppy eyes, like he was my superhero.

"You're a regular then?" he asked me.

I know what he was doing. Since Touya called to tell me to suck it up and make nice with the man, he had probably told Yue the same thing. The dirty little snake was trying to find dirt on me, so that he could discredit me as a professional therapist! Once he succeeded, he could '_fire_' me, and he would have the last laugh. But, hah! I wasn't that easy!

"No," I said, putting on a fake smile. "My friend is the owner. I'm only watching the place for her, that's what friends do. They help each other. I'm not a party girl... In fact, I don't really like scenes like this; it's loud and noisy... What about you, Yue-san?"

He raised a slender eyebrow and said, "Same. Cognac, please."

"Was that man your friend?" I asked. Maybe he was cheating on Syaoran. I smiled mentally at the image. Maybe they would break up over Yue's infidelity, and I could have Syaoran. Oh, what a happy thought.

_Please, God_... I prayed, _let it be true_.

"Business associate," he answered, sipping the cognac. Why wasn't I surprised that he would pick the most expensive alcoholic drink on the list?

"By the way, my brother told me to apologize for my behavior on Monday," I said.

A long silence.

"...And?"

"And?" I asked him.

"Aren't you going to apologize?"

I blinked at him in confusion. "Did I say that?"

"You just said—"

"Well, yeah," I continued. "I said that my brother told me to apologize to you."

"I don't hear an apology," he said.

I gulped down the rest of my drink. "I said my brother told me to, but I didn't say anything about satisfying your bloated ego," I said and asked Shun for another drink.

He growled and shoved the rest of his drink down his throat. Slamming his glass on the counter, he too called for another round. I didn't know why we were like fire and ice. Why didn't we get along? Was it because he was the lover of the man I found myself attracted to, after God knows how many years, and I was—_possibly_—secretly holding a grudge against the silver haired man because he (though not technically) _stole_ the man of my dreams?

Was that why I hated him so much?

So I figured out why I disliked him... _I think_... but why did he dislike me? Everybody loved me.

One drink led to another, and the two of us eventually turned it into a drinking contest. I didn't have a high alcohol tolerance, but I'd be damned if I lost to that insufferable man.

"...You know..." I began to slur somewhere between my tenth and fifteenth drink. "...You are such a... a—a jerk. What's so g-great about you anyway? I'm—hiccup—much cuter."

He scoffed. "Cute? Like a damn button, you mean."

I gave him a glare. "MORE!" We shouted at the same time.

"I think you two have had enough..." said Shun.

"MORE!"

I should have just stopped. Why didn't I know my own limits? If only I'd kept in mind that excessive consumption of alcohol does nothing for you except come back and bite you in the ass later on.

And, boy, did it bite me in the ass.

O—o—x—o—O

O—o—x—o—O

The next morning, I woke up feeling like shit. The morning light was giving me a damn headache, and it felt like my head weighed a ton on my neck. I felt nauseated, and my throat was dry. Overall, it was a horrible feeling. It's never wise to start a morning with a hangover.

I didn't want to get out of bed.

The extremely comfy bed did not help this matter either. The blanket was so warm and smooth and soft, like silk or velvet.

...And that was when I started to snap back to my senses. Uhm... silk or velvet? Since when did my bed become like silk or velvet?

I told myself to think back to the night before. And when I did, I wished that I hadn't.

Okay, so what if the bed I was lying in didn't seem right? Maybe I was still dreaming but, in actuality, I was lying in my good old not-so-comfy bed, dreaming that I was sleeping in a luxurious bed? Okay... a little far-fetched... but it could be true, you just never know.

I convinced myself that if I opened my eyes, maybe things wouldn't be so bad. When I did... well, it really was just plain horrible. It was worse than a terrible nightmare. I was in the same bed with the man I'd started to detest with every bone in my body just two days ago. To make it worse, I just had to be freaking naked too. So the 'maybe nothing happened between us' optimistic outlook was definitely out the window.

How did this happen in the first place? Nothing in my life went right the past few days. Nothing! I sat there for a long time and asked myself what I'd done wrong... More importantly, what went wrong in my life that had started all of this?

Well, it had started with Touya's phone call, which led to the visit, which in turn led to the airport, where I'd met Yukito, who is the root of my suffering because I wouldn't have met Syaoran if he hadn't taken me along. Or should I blame Touya because I wouldn't have met Yue either if it hadn't been for him.

Too many people responsible for ruining my life.

"Okay, Sakura, calm down. Do not panic," I calmly said to myself. Well, as calmly as possible in this situation. The last thing I wanted to happen was to wake Yue up. "Okay. Just get your things... and tip-toe out of here. He probably won't remember a single thing from last night."

Yup. Probably.

"Brilliant plan!"

So I quietly got out of bed and went to look through the scattered clothes on the floor for my belongings. I was just about done with getting dressed when a knock came at the door.

"Yue?" I heard Syaoran's voice, and I quickly dropped to the floor. A crazy thought came to me, and it just might work. Maybe I could hide under the bed until the two of them left. This trick worked in movies all the time, and someone had to have gotten these tricks from somewhere. Right? Okay, so I started to crawl under the bed... and... and... HOE! My butt wouldn't make it under the darn bed. Had my butt always been this big? "Come on, get up! It's fucking 9 o'clock already. We have our session today."

I heard the door knob turning. Then the door creaked open and footsteps entered the room. "Damn it, Yue, get up!"

"Hn..." the sleeping man groaned. "Go away."

"Fuck, Yue!" Syaoran appeared to be very frustrated. "Get up now, or I'm going to kiss you up."

Oh, God...

"Fine, fine. I'm up!" Yue sounded wide awake, to my surprise. "That's weird. Where is she?"

_Ooh, crap_, I groaned inwardly in my head.

Darn it. He was not supposed to remember who his one night stand was! You never do! That was the point of a one night stand!

"Who?" asked Syaoran.

I heard shuffling noises on the bed.

Holy shi— Oh no... Oh shit, oh shit, oh shit, OH SHIT!

The inevitable was coming. Oh, the torture, the hell, the damnation!

"There you are," said the Wolf to the Lamb. "Why are you on the floor?"

I'd always said that it wouldn't be so bad to sleep with a handsome man, but _this_ handsome man was not acceptable.

_Dear, God..._

_Why does it have to be him of all people—why not the other man in the room, who is not as handsome but still damn good looking? I don't mind having the second best man. Really, I don't. So, please, feel free to give some other girl the best one of all. I'm sure she deserves him more than I do._

"Sakura?" said Syaoran. I wasn't sure what the look on his face meant, but I was sure that I didn't quite want to find out either. Whether it was disgust or hatred, I was fine with not knowing. "You two...?"

Neither Yue nor I made any effort to explain ourselves. After all, what could we say—what lies could we come up with? Wasn't what it looked like self-explanatory enough? Okay, the night before when I thought that it would be nice if Yue was cheating on Syaoran, I did not mean with me... nor did I _wish_ it to be me.

So, why _ME_!

"Well, we're definitely going to have something to talk about during therapy today, won't we?" Syaoran laughed, almost bitingly.

_Oh, right... I'm their couple's therapist._

Syaoran left the room and I was left with Yue... alone. We were just looking at each other, unsure of what to say. What could we say?

I slept with him.

It was a simple as that.

Oh, wait...

"Oh my goodness..." I said. "I slept with a gay man!"

What did that make me? _Oh, mommy, I'm going to hell!_

"If it makes you feel any better," Yue said as he got up and put his boxers on, "I'm bisexual, not gay."

"It still doesn't change the situation, now _does it_?" I snapped at him.

He shrugged his shoulders nonchalantly before disappearing into another room on the other side of the room. I heard the sound of water running, so I assumed he was taking a shower.

My life was doomed.

I was destined to live a life of loneliness and full of disappointments. After all, I was attracted to my gay patient, who seemed to think that I had slept with his lover. Okay, so he didn't _think_ that I had slept with his lover... he _knew_ that I did. It couldn't be _that_ bad, right?

Oh, gosh... my life was pretty much over.

Do you see happiness in my future?

Because I sure as hell didn't.

* * *

«—**To be continued**—»


	3. meeting the devil

「L ◦ O ◦ V ◦ E」  
_and_  
«—OTHER DISASTERS—»

.◦.  
_Beta-reader_: Sakura-chan Master of the Clow

chapter 3: meeting the devil

O—o—x—o—O

O—o—x—o—O

O—o—x—o—O

O—o—x—o—O

Well, _okaaay, _the ride _back_ to Naoko's club wasn't awkward at all! What was so awkward about riding in the same car with the man I had slept with out of drunkenness and his lover—the person said man had cheated on by sleeping with me? Not to mention who was also the object of my desire.

According to what little Yue remembered about the night before, which wasn't much by the way, there was a smelly cab involved. Yes, that was all the man remembers—the stinky smell of the cab. So I took it as we both ended up in a cab and was taken to his place... _somehow_. And that was why we were going back to Amazon—to get our cars. It wasn't to retrace our steps and see who came on to who first or anything like that. But, of course, I was positive that it was Yue who came on to me first.

"I'm going to call the office," I said, seeing that we were over an hour late.

"Oh, God, Sakura!" Miko sounded like she was in a panic. "Do you know what time it is?"

"10:38 AM," I said to her, "according to my watch anyway, but mine is retarded. What does yours say?"

Apparently, Miko didn't find my sense of humor so amusing. "Where are you? You have less than half an hour left before your next patient comes in. Luckily for you, your first patients have not shown up yet."

_That's because they're sitting in the same car with me_, I wanted to say. I wondered whether I should just tell her the truth or give her one of my ingenious excuses. Always the latter.

"There's a sniper in my neighborhood," I said. "I didn't feel safe leaving for work this morning, so I decided to wait for him to leave. I think he's leaving soon though."

Syaoran bit on his knuckles to stop himself from laughing his ass off.

"Uh-huh... I'm going to write 'sniper' in the logbook then," drawled Miko on the other line. "Get here as soon as you can, and don't run into the sniper however. I won't know how to explain to your brother when he comes back."

"Yeah, yeah."

I hung up the phone. Syaoran turned to give me a crooked smile.

"What?" I asked him.

"A sniper? Come on now," Yue said from the backseat.

I turned around and looked at him. "Do you know who lives in the apartment next to mine?" I asked.

"Who?"

"That porn star you men love so much," I answered. "You never know when a jealous housewife will finally snap her string of sanity and decides to hire a sniper to kill off the unintentional third wheel in her marriage. So it_can_ happen—the sniper, I mean."

"Just admit that you're an idiot," he said with a smirk.

"I am not an idiot. For your information, I had a full scholarship in college!" I was beginning to feel a little indignant. I could act silly at times, but they didn't have to take my silliness and turn it into stupidity. I was not stupid!

"Impressive."

"You know what? You're a complete asshole," I said to him. "And I can say this to you because we're not having our session yet. So you can't tell Touya on me—hah!"

"And, yet, you slept with said ass..." mused Syaoran; successfully shutting the both of us up. "And Yue, I guess you _should_ know if she's an idiot or not since you slept with her."

Ouch.

A bitter sting—but a little harsh much?

My Prince Charming wasn't supposed to be mean. He was supposed to be sweet and, well, charming. Gosh... I didn't know Syaoran could be mean and bitter. Apparently he could when he wanted to be. I sort of did deserve it a little. After all, what man wouldn't get mad if he caught his lover cheating on him with their couples therapist, who was supposed to be fixing their relationship, not come in between them. Not to mention that Yue and I were being a little inconsiderate of Syaoran's feelings when we were bickering at each other li—... like... like we were a couple or something!

When I thought about it... since that morning, I hadn't heard Yue's apology to Syaoran, nor had the man shown any signs that he was sorry.

It made me angry on Syaoran's behalf. He deserved someone better than that wretched man! (Not suggesting myself and I, of course.)

"You are angry?" asked Yue, although it sounded more like a statement than a question.

"Shouldn't I be?" Syaoran answered back.

I observed as a smile graced Yue's stoic face. He looked at me and said to the other man, "You have no reason to be."

He then turned his head and looked out the window, and I was left to my own thoughts. And so were those two.

O—o—x—o—O

O—o—x—o—O

"Oh, you're finally here!" exclaimed Miko when she saw me walking out of the elevator. "And so are those two..."

I decided it was best to ignore the looks she and the other two or three people in the room were giving me.

"Are Mr. and Mrs. Yamaguchi here already?" I asked her.

"They've been waiting inside for about ten minutes," she said before eyeing at Yue and Syaoran. "What do you want to do with these two?"

"I'll work with them through lunch," I told her. I turned to the two and said, "Take a seat. I'll get to you in a hour."

Yue gave me one of his I-wait-for-nobody looks.

"You—" I poked his chest with my index finger. "—Ass in a chair. _Now_. And _you_—" I turned to Syaoran. Willing away the blush that threatened to stain my cheeks, I said, "—wear an undershirt from now on."

The man was confused by what I was saying to him. Well, it was one of those either you get it or you don't situation, because there was no way in hell was I telling him that I—_and every person on the face of this planet that wasn't blind_—could see his cute little nipples hardening through his white dress shirt. Oh, Lord... he was going to be the death of me.

"Miko, would you please turn off the AC?" I said to her and walked away before I could get a nosebleed.

Or jump him.

O—o—x—o—O

O—o—x—o—O

Time flew by really fast when my mind was occupied by things that shouldn't even be in my head in the first place. Things that were roundish and have sort of like a soft doe brown color. Soft and tender. So yummy and sweet.

A guilty pleasure.

It was one of those things I knew I shouldn't do, or I'd been told that it wasn't good for me, but I couldn't help it. I did it anyway. Who can ever walk away from such temptations?

It was a sin, I tell you, to not devour such a delectable thing—or have a lick here and there anyway. Savoring the taste like some strange, illicit pleasure.

How could I resist having such a wonderful taste on my tongue? Just the thought of that mouthwatering treat, melting on your tongue, can drive a person absolutely crazy.

I knew I shouldn't be having these thoughts. They were oh so wrong, especially then and there.

But I just had this sudden craving for some co—

"We don't know how we can ever thank you, Sakura," said Mrs. Yamaguchi. "You saved our marriage."

I snapped out of my dreamland. I started to blush because of my late reaction, not exactly the professional image I had hoped to give my patients. "No need to thank me," I said to them. "It is you two, not me, who have saved your marriage."

I walked the couple over to the door, feeling truly happy for them. I shook their hands and said, "What I'm going to say is bad for business but, I hope I won't have to see you two back here again."

"Thank you again for everything that you've done for us."

I smiled at them and waved them off. "Take care now."

"Would you like me to order lunch in for you?" Miko asked me.

"That'll be nice, thank you. Oh, Miko, you wouldn't happen to know where I can get some cookie dough in the next five minutes do you?"

She looked at me strangely. "Cookie dough?"

"Never mind."

Well, so much for my craving.

"Miko, please order some lunch for them too." Turning to the source of my growing headache, I motioned for them to come on in.

"How does sushi sound to everybody?" she asked.

"Sushi sounds wonderful. Thank you," I said and closed the door behind me. "So, are you ready to do this?"

"Hn," were the replies I was given from the two of them.

Syaoran lay comfortably on the couch while Yue sat in _my_ chair—the _therapist's_ chair (you know, the one that makes me look all smart and cool, _that_ chair)—with his feet on my coffee table. It was like they were taking over my office. I'd heard of invasion of privacy after sleeping with someone, but this was ridiculous. Was I supposed to _stand_ during our session?

I resorted to pulling an office chair from my desk over to where they were leisurely enjoying themselves.

"So, let's begin, shall we?" I tried to sound as perky and nice as I possibly could. "First, I need to know some small details about your relationship. How long have you two known each other?"

I glanced at the two of them and saw the way they briefly looked at each other. A second passed, and then a minute. Then five minutes.

"How about this? The first person to answer will get a cookie." As soon as the words left my mouth, the two turned to look at me like I was some demented nut. I walked over to my bookshelf and took the cookie jar from the top shelf.

I went back to my seat and set the cookie jar on the coffee table. "I'm serious. The first one to answer will get a cookie. You know you want some. Anyone? Okay, you don't know what you're missing!"

No answer.

"It's chunky chocolate chips. Mm-hmm!" I took a cookie from the cookie jar and noticed Syaoran eyeing the cookie in my hand, his lips twitching. "Syaoran, would you like one?"

I held the cookie in front of his face.

"You can't buy me with a cookie," he said and crossed his arms over his chest.

"How about the jar then? You can have as many as you want."

He quickly sat up and grabbed for a cookie from the jar. "What was the question?"

I smiled when Yue rubbed his temples in slight frustration. This trick always worked when I dealt with couples who gave me a hard time. No one can resist free cookies.

"How long have you two known each other?"

"Nineteen years."

"And how long have you two been together?"

"Nine."

They had been together for that long already? Wow. If I were to date a man for nine years, I would be telling him to put a ring on my finger already. But wait... was gay marriage allowed in Japan? I decided to wait and ask Eriol the next time that I saw him, he was a lawyer so he should know.

"If you can use one word to describe your relationship, what word would that be?"

Syaoran shrugged slightly. "I don't know, complicated."

"What do you think is complicated about it?"

"Just look at the man," he said. "He's a damn over-controlling, impatient fucker."

I looked up from my writing pad. Wow. I'd never heard this kind of language being used by any one of my patients before.

Yue shifted in his seat and said, with irritation in his voice, "What did you just call me?"

Syaoran took a cookie from the cookie jar. "You heard me. You're a damn lousy fucker." And he took a bite of the cookie as if he was taunting the silver haired man.

Um... I didn't know how I should take that comment. Was he calling Yue a 'lousy fucker', as in he was a fucker _and_ he was a lousy man?

Or did he mean to say that Yue sucked in bed?

"Says the attention whore," Yue spat.

"Guys, can we keep the language PG _please_?" I said.

"At least I haven't bed any of my shrinks!" shouted Syaoran, angrily. He grabbed the cookie jar and hurled the object at the man sitting across from him, missing his head by an inch. The jar hit the back of the chair and shattered into pieces. "But I guess it can't be helped, since you have a habit of doing that anyway—always had and always will be immoral!"

I blinked.

_Gay men are... scary_. Well, _this_ gay man was scary when he was pissed.

My expensive cookie jar... my cookies... and my God...

"You're bleeding!" I jumped up from my seat and quickly moved to check out the cut on Yue's face. It was a small cut, but blood was leaking, nevertheless. I turned to yell at Syaoran, "Did you have to do that? It almost hit him! How could you be so reckless?"

"Sakura, what is going on in here?" The door suddenly opened, and Miko stood there with a shocked look on her face. "Your lunch came."

Syaoran scowled. Grabbing the tissue box off my desk, he walked over to me slowly. "Get away from him," he said in a calm, quiet—yet cold—voice. I quickly put a good amount of distance between Yue and me. Syaoran wiped the blood away from the other man's face. "Why didn't you dodge?"

"You always throw things whenever you have a tantrum," said Yue. "If you had set out to hurt me intentionally, I would've dodged."

"And that's why you're such a fucker. Overconfident pain in the ass." Syaoran threw the tissue box onto Yue's lap. "Wipe your own stupid blood."

He then made his way toward me and said, softly, "I'm sorry. C-Can you... can you look after him? I'm going to go get a little fresh air."

_Their relationship_...

There was a hint of sadness in his voice. I didn't know how to put it, but seeing him like that felt unbearable for some reason. Maybe it was my natural instincts as a therapist to help my patients feel better; but maybe it was something else.

..._Hasn't come to the point of no return yet_. _It can be saved_—I could help them.

Helping their relationship, however, meant that I had to give up all hopes on Syaoran. Did I really want to do that?

But it was my job as their couples therapist to do whatever it took to keep them together. My parents had always taught my brother and me that we couldn't ever be the ones to give up... even if the patient decided to give up, we couldn't give up on them—because no one should ever give up on a life. In the past, there had been situations in which I couldn't prevent my patients from breaking up or divorcing, but I did everything that I could have possibly done to help them. In the end, however, it was always up to the couple.

When I said that I could save their relationship, I didn't actually mean that I could _save_ it, literally. _No one has that kind of power_. By 'save', I meant that I could _guide_ them into seeing what they thought, felt, and knew would be the right path for them.

People sometimes mistaken people of my profession for miracle workers or their personal savior in life. We can't actually _save_ people from the bottom of Hell and bring them back to life.

_We guide them_.

Yue and Syaoran just needed some guidance in their relationship. The brief interaction between the two of them—well, more like _fighting_ than interaction—said a lot to me, even when they hadn't actually _said_ anything to me. For one thing, they cared for each other, but in a strange, abnormal way.

It seemed to me like Yue did things intentionally to get some sort of reaction from Syaoran, and willingly allowed himself to be at the receiving end of Syaoran's anger releases. And from what I saw, the latter's anger release technique involved hurling any objects he could lay hands on at his lover—but he didn't have the intention of hurting the man. This alone told me how much trust these two put into each other. Yue was confident that Syaoran would never hurt him, that was why he allowed himself to be a sitting target. Syaoran trusted that Yue would always trust him, even when his well-being was on the line, to not hurt the man.

They lacked communication with each other, like most couples in rocky relationships do. The foundation of their relationship was based on silent trust—they trusted the other person to not hurt them, betray them, and stop caring for them.

_It's true that trust is one of the most important things to have in a relationship, if not the most important one, but without the other things, trust alone is hardly a strong enough pillar to keep the relationship from crumbling down._

The look Syaoran had given me... I'd seen it many times before. It was always the same sad look right before the person called it quits.

If I let him walk out that door... what would happen? If he gave up and their relationship failed, then that would be good for me... wouldn't it?

'_Sakura_...' I could practically hear my father's righteous voice in my head.

Okay, okay. Sheesh! Why did my conscience have to be my father? Well, his voice that constantly popped up whenever I was about to do something "_bad_" anyway. Why couldn't my conscience be Jiminy Cricket? Pinocchio didn't have to listen to the little bugger all the time. But I felt obligated to do everything my father's voice told me to do inside my little head, because if I didn't then I could never look my father in the eyes whenever I saw him in person. And that feeling was worse than physical torture.

"Syaoran, wait!" I called out to him. "Miko, look after the injured one, would you? Syaoran!"

I had no choice but to listen to my conscience, against my own will. I ran after the brunet. I finally caught up to him, just barely making it into the elevator in time.

"Do you mind if I come along?" I asked when he looked at me. He shrugged his shoulders, a small smile tugging on his lips. I asked him, "What?"

"Nothing. I'm just starting to see what Yue sees in you," he said. He pushed the button for the first floor, and the elevator started moving.

"And what is it that he sees in me?"

He didn't answer me right away. He just looked at me, not saying a word.

"What does he see in me?" I tried to ask again.

"Are you curiously desperate, or are you desperately curious?" he asked me.

"Wha—" I stared at him. "That doesn't even make any sense!"

The elevator stopped on the first floor and he prepared to get off.

"Are you going to tell me what he sees in me or not?" I asked him, growing a little annoyed with the carrot he kept dangling in front of me. For your information, I was not dying to know what they thought of me—or _saw_ in me—but it still didn't hurt to know. Right? I mean, sure, I was curious, but I wasn't like desperately curious... or curiously desperate—whatever he had meant by that.

The elevator doors opened and he got off. "You really want to know?"

I puffed my cheeks. "If you don't want me to ask, then you shouldn't have mentioned it in the first place."

I hate it when people tell you things but they don't tell you everything.

"So what does Yue see in me that you're beginning to see in me too?"

He smirked and said, "An idiot."

I-I... id—_idiot_!

"Why you little—" The elevator doors closed before I could finish my sentence. I pushed the button for the doors to open again. The brunet had probably used the chance to leave anyway. He could have just said that he didn't want me to come along and I wouldn't have tagged along, instead of playing this trick on me.

But when the doors opened again, he was still standing there. And he had this cute sheepish grin on his face. What woman can stay mad at a face like that? ...Darn him.

"You were saying before you were rudely interrupted?" he said.

"I'm glad you were able to get into a better mood at my expense," I said to him instead.

He grinned at me. "What are therapists for?"

"At least you said therapist and not shrink this time. Now... have you calmed down?"

"Calm enough not to throw any more of your cookie jars," he said.

I laughed. "Speaking of that, you owe me a ¥6000 cookie jar."

"For a cookie jar?"

"It was a very special cookie jar," I told him. "Let's go. There's still like thirty minutes left, you can't leave yet."

He groaned but reluctantly got into the elevator anyway.

"How dare you groan like that? You should be ecstatic to have me as your therapist. I'm young _and_ cute! What more can you ask for?" I was only joking with him, of course. "Now, if it was Touya then you should be moaning and groaning."

He snorted, rather ungentlemanly. He still looked hot doing it though. "No, if it was that other red-haired woman _then_ I would be moaning and groaning. But I suppose moaning and groaning under your brother isn't a bad thing either."

OH.

MY.

GOD.

OH—MY—_FUCKING_—GOD!

My brain fried itself. If it wasn't enough that my gay patient was making gay sex jokes beside me inside an elevator, he just had to make a gay sex joke that involved Touya. My older, not to mention _married_, brother. _Yuck—GROSS_! The nasty image of my brother and Syaoran— ...Oh, gosh... I was never going to be normal again after the one month was over. It had been only like, what, three days since meeting these two and my life had already turned topsy turvy.

Wait a minute...

"Do you, like, have a crush on my brother or something?" I asked him.

He stared at me. "What are you talking about?"

"On Monday you told me that you thought he was hot and just a minute ago you said that moaning and groaning under him might not be such a bad thing. Do you like my brother?" I said to him. "Because if you do, you better pack your things quickly and leave town because my sister-in-law will hunt you down and castrate you."

He chuckled and said, rather daringly might I add, "Nobody can touch this."

He then grabbed my right hand and... and... Oh... my... Kami-sama...

_Breathe, Sakura_. Breathe.

Deep breaths.

Deep _freaking_ breaths.

The elevator stopped with a ding as the doors slid open. Syaoran flashed me a dazzling smile and kissed the palm of my right hand chastely before walking off. I couldn't move my feet. I was frozen in place, incapable of budging an inch. I debated whether I should just quietly ride the elevator back down, dash to my car and make a run for it. Or find the next closest window and jump out.

"Sakura?" Syaoran called out my name. He was standing at my office door, smiling ever so beguilingly. "What's wrong?"

And he had the audacity to ask me that question. He knew damn well _what_ was wrong—what he just did!

You really can't trust everything you see—appearances are damn deceiving.

If I thought Yue was a son of a duck and the worst possible bastard on the face of this planet, it was because I hadn't met the Devil yet.

_The Devil has a name_...

..._and it's Li Syaoran_.

* * *

«—**To be continued**—»


	4. hell is full of surprises

「L ◦ O ◦ V ◦ E」  
_and_  
«—OTHER DISASTERS—»

.◦.  
_Beta-reader_: Sakura-chan Master of the Clow

chapter 4: hell is full of surprises

O—o—x—o—O

O—o—x—o—O

O—o—x—o—O

O—o—x—o—O

"Hm—this sushi is delicious!" happily exclaimed Syaoran. "Yue, we have to order sushi from this place for lunch every day!"

The man being spoken to merely grunted. Yue was staring at the sushi like it was his worst enemy. "It's raw," he said.

"Of course it's raw!" Syaoran rolled his eyes. He picked up a sushi roll and shoved it into the other man's mouth. "It's sushi."

Yue quickly spat the sushi out of his mouth. Then the roll of sushi, covered with his saliva and germs, landed on my lap. "It's disgusting, that's what it is."

I stared at the once glorious thing. My skirt—my beautiful designer skirt—_ruined_ by a sushi roll.

"How can you call yourself Japanese if you can't even eat a little sushi?" said Syaoran, picking the sushi roll from my lap. I didn't know which was worse: how close his hand came to brushing over _that_ place, or how he could easily pop the sushi back into his mouth.

_Oh, Kami-sama, have mercy on my poor heart._

Yue cringed in disgust. "I'm not Japanese. And neither are you."

"You're both Chinese?" I asked.

Syaoran looked at me and smiled. "Oh, so you've decided to speak? I was starting to worry that I'd traumatized you. I'm happy to see that's not the case."

I could feel his gaze boring into me. He licked his bottom lip in a suggestive manner.

God...

I thought it was Prince Charming I'd fallen for but, in actuality, I had fallen for none other than the Devil himself. I had been deceived by the charming, innocent facade.

Yes, he was charming—charmingly dirty and perverted. And yes, he was innocent—innocently wicked.

After the elevator "_incident_", I told the two men that we were going to resume with our session after a quick lunch, during which I was not going to speak to them. I thought I did a pretty good job. I didn't say a word to them for three whole minutes—_THREE_ minutes. Okay... you can stop judging me now.

"Hmph!" I said sticking my tongue out at him. I ignored him and looked at the sushi tray on the table, trying to decide which one to get. I finally settled on the makizushi over the nigirizushi. I popped the sushi into my mouth—hmm, so good!

But just when I was enjoying my lunch, the Devil leaned over—his hand on my shoulder—and whispered softly into my ear, "Did you wash your hand?"

…My hand...

I looked at my hand. My _right_ hand. The hand I just picked the sushi up with—the hand he had...

_Ooh, crap_.

I ran over to the garbage can and spat out the sushi.

"What a waste! Did you not like the taste?" He feigned innocence, and feigned it well.

The Devil—I tell you—he was the Devil.

"Can we get back to the session?" Yue was frowning irritably. He glared distastefully at Syaoran and me as if he'd just witnessed an illicit affair before him. "Half of my day is wasted on nothing."

"Well, we wouldn't have wasted any time if two unnamed people hadn't decided to hit it off with the birds and the bees," said Syaoran gruffly. "I believe the one who reserves the right to complain should be me."

Yue grunted, rubbing his forehead. "Is that the reason behind your bitchy mood today?"

"I have the right to be bitchy wherever and _whenever_ I damn please," said Syaoran; still eating them sushi. Quite calmly, might I add—_too_ calmly.

"We will discuss this matter when we get home. You've embarrassed yourself quite enough today," said the other man. "Where do you think we are?"

"Don't you use that tone of voice with me. You do not control me, Yue." Syaoran growled, narrowing his eyes at his lover. "I don't answer to you! Who do you think you are?"

Yue suddenly got up from his seat. He stalked over to where Syaoran was seated, and got in his face in a threatening manner. He yanked Syaoran's hair.

"The person who owns your damn ass—that's who I am," he said; angrily.

I saw red in Syaoran's eyes.

Uh-oh. Not good.

I ran over to my desk and paged for Miko. "Red alert! Red alert! This is not a drill!" I said into the phone. "I repeat, this is not a drill!"

I quickly moved about the room and grabbed all of the breakable objects I could set my hands on, including the small ones that could either poke an eye out or break someone's skull—the '_someone_' being Yue.

Miko then busted through the door with a can of pepper spray in her hands. "Just tell me when, Sakura!" she said. "Just tell me when—I am ready!"

I sweat dropped. When I'd told Miko earlier that I was going to call her for help if I felt trouble coming, by '_help_' I didn't mean to get a can of pepper spray and spray my patient's eyes out. I cautiously took the can away from her.

"I appreciate your effort," I said to her, "but you can go back out now."

She looked at me warily. "Are you sure you can handle these two alone?"

I nodded with a smile and shooed her out.

The anger vanished from Yue's voice as he said, "This therapy thing was a bad idea to begin with."

Syaoran snorted and pushed Yue away from him. "Tell that to Meiling."

And I wondered who this '_Meiling_' person was. Was she a friend? Relative? Or... _something else_?

"Who is Meiling?" I blurted out before I could stop myself. I wasn't supposed to say that out loud.

"No one you need to know," Yue said, coldly, as he eyed me from the corner of his eye.

I was taken by surprise by his reaction. He'd never given me _that_ look before. Even when he called me an idiot or ridiculed me in some sort of way, he never looked at me that way—nor had he spoken to me in _that_ voice. My curiosity was truly peaked—who _was_ this Meiling?

"Then I won't ask," I said. "Since we have less than ten minutes to our session, I see no point in continuing—" The two started to move before I could finish. "—So I thought maybe we can go over some details on how to not waste session time from now on."

They groaned exasperatedly.

"You both have very important matters to attend to, I'm sure. You don't want to see a repeat of today again, do you?"

"Can't we pretend to have these sessions?" asked Syaoran.

"By 'pretend', do you mean to say that you two don't show up but I write down in the logbook that you do?"

They nodded.

"Sorry, but no," I said.

"And why not?" Yue said. "We don't need a shrink."

I rolled my eyes slightly. "Whether you are in need of a shrink, as you like to call it, or not is up to my brother to decide. Touya left you to me for a month so I can make you two less repugnant and more likeable to deal with. If he comes back and you're still your current pain-in-the-ass selves, he will rain hell on me. And frankly speaking, I'm more afraid of my brother than I am afraid of the things what might happen to me in this one month. Neither party wants to do this. Why don't we try to get along and make it work?"

Syaoran and Yue exchanged glances.

To convince them, I then said, "If you make this hard for me, you'll only make it harder for yourselves later on when you have to deal with Touya. I know my brother. He hates dealing with people's relationships. I don't know what you two are seeing him for, but he sees your relationship as a big problem, and unless you and I solve this problem together—in a peaceful manner—he will ride your asses like slaves to get over said problem. And I didn't mean that in _your_ good way. He will achieve the same result in the end, so you can do it the easy way or the hard and painful way. It's up to you."

"The easy way would be to go through this shit for a whole month?" Yue grunted.

"On Friday morning, if the two of you aren't here, I'll give my brother a call. We won't have to see each other anymore," I said. "But if you're smart, you'll show up Friday morning, on time, and willing to cooperate. It's up to you. You can go home and discuss this over with each other."

They started to walk away.

"However—" I stopped them when they got to the door, "—if you do show up, you will have to listen to me from now on. No objections, no complaints, no bullshit."

They left.

I walked over to my desk and fell back into my chair.

_Dear God... _that had to be _the_ worst one hour in my entire life.

That one hour session had me questioning my whole life. Had I made a huge mistake in choosing my career? Why did I choose to become a couples therapist? Why... why... _why_?

Why did my father have to be a psychology professor and my mother a psychologist? Why did my brother become a psychiatrist? If he had become a doctor or a lawyer, I wouldn't have felt obligated to follow the family footsteps. Even so, why didn't I become a high school counselor or something? Why did I choose to become a couples therapist?

_Oh, God, why?_

"Sakura?" Miko called out to me from the doorway. "Are you okay?"

"Miko, can you get me something for my headache?" I asked the woman.

She left and quickly came back with some pills and a glass of water.

She giggled slightly. "You'll get used to it, I think. Your brother gets a headache every time after dealing with these two, although I've never seen them get violent with each other before."

I took the medicine and water from her. "How long have they been under Touya's care?"

"A week," she answered.

So they only had like three sessions before Touya left? What... the... crap...?

"Do you know what they are seeing my brother for?"

She shook her head. "Didn't your brother write it down in their files? You know I'm not supposed to read the files on the clients."

Oh... right... their files. The manila folder with papers containing confidential information inside. The same manila folder that I fed to the shredder out of anger.

I strained a laugh out. "Oh, right, right! I haven't gotten around to looking at their files yet, but I'll be sure to do it soon. Hey, Miko?"

"Hm?"

"Let's say, _hypothetically_, if a client's files just happen to be shredded into tiny strips of paper—how badly do you think my brother will freak out?"

"When I misplaced the files of one of our clients, he cut my paycheck for a month and made me stay overtime to organize the record room for two weeks. I don't know about shredding the files though," she said. "Why? You didn't do anything stupid, did you?"

I smiled at her. "Me? No way! When have I ever done anything stupid?"

I—was—so—screwed.

O—o—x—o—O

O—o—x—o—O

"You ran out on them, didn't you?" Was the first thing I said to my brother when I picked up the phone to call him later that evening.

"What are you talking about?"

I sighed exasperatedly. "You ran out on Yue and Syaoran, didn't you? You couldn't handle them with their relationship being like this, so you conveniently decided to have a fifth honeymoon with your pregnant wife and left me with them!"

And he dared to laugh on the other line. "I left them with you because I know you can help them."

I rolled my eyes. "Oh, PUH-LEASE! Like I would ever believe that. Just admit that you ran out on them."

"You've fucking dealt with them—" And he _finally_ cracked, "—I would've committed homicide on our fourth session!"

"You're a psychiatrist, you have an easier time with them than me! You can prescribe some kind of medicine to keep them all happy-happy, but I have to freaking communicate with them," I said. "Do you know how hard that is? It's like nearly impossible!"

Touya snorted on the other line. "It's just one month—do your big brother this one favor. I'll give you a bit of advice, conventional methods will not work on them. They are too smart for you."

"Oh, gee, thank you for being the third person today to call me stupid!" I said with much zeal.

"Sakura, just shut up and listen. You will not get anywhere with them until you get their full cooperation. And even when you have their cooperation, you _still_ won't get anywhere with them if you continue to use your let's-sit-down-and-discuss-our-feelings-and-connect-our-souls methods. They'll always be two steps ahead of you, and they'll toy with you until you break into tears," said my brother.

"Wow... are they that bad?" I asked, suddenly feeling quite lucky that they hadn't made me cry—_yet_.

"Yes," he said. "If you want to conquer them, you'll have to think outside the box."

"W-Wait. If you're giving me such good advices, then why can't you handle them?"

"Let's just say that Yue has gotten under my skin quite a few times," Touya answered. "I can only put a muzzle on him, not a leash."

"So you two don't get along?"

"We get along," he said. "Yue and I have known each other since high school. I can only be his psychiatrist to a certain degree—there are _things_ that I cannot touch on."

"Being his friend, it's hard for you to keep a cool head and make judgments clearly." I sighed quietly. "Fine... I'll help you—but just this once! However, when you come back, you owe me big time, and I mean BIG time! _So _big that if I did something wrong while you were gone, you will not punish me."

"What did you do, Sakura?" His voice was stern.

"Onii-chan, I'll have to call you back because I am about to go through this tunnel—" And to make it more believable, I started to make static noises into the phone. "—I'm losing you!"

I heard a sigh on the other line.

"Sakura, you're calling me from your home phone," he said. _Oops_. "So unless a tunnel has magically appeared in your living room, I suggest you tell me what you did—"

And I hung up on him.

Five seconds later, my phone started ringing. I jumped up from the couch and ran to hide in the corner; far, far away from the phone. It kept ringing and ringing and ringing. Oh, that wretched sound!

I heard a BEEP.

'_My office first thing in the morning when I get back,_' was the brief message he left. Oh, gosh... I'd just made my own deathbed.

Just then my cell phone rang, it was Rika. I wondered why she was calling me. Was it to ask why I didn't go to lunch meet? Or maybe it was about her wedding...

_Oh, dear God, please let it be the first one_... I prayed. Well, you know what they say about prayers...

"Sakura," Rika's sweet voice said on the other line, "did I catch you at a bad time?"

"No," I answered. "What's up?"

"Did you eat lunch at your office today?"

Okay... so there was hope that she'd called to talk about the first scenario.

"Yeah. It's a long story, I'll tell you girls at lunch tomorrow."

"Actually... about that..." She was stalling, I could tell. "...That's why I called."

...And I could hear funeral music being played.

"Sakura, you're one of my best friends—" the girl started out saying. "And really the only single friend I have left— Oh gosh! I didn't mean it to sound like that. What I mean is... well... I was hoping that you would be my maid of honor. You don't have to agree if you don't want to, but it'll make Yoshiyuki and me really happy because you were the first one to encourage our relationship."

I sighed inwardly.

How I dreaded being the only single one left in the group—well, there was Naoko... but she didn't count. When Tomoyo got married, I was the maid of honor. When Chiharu got married, I was the maid of honor. When Naoko had a pretend wedding with Shun as part of a drinking game, I was _also_ the maid of honor—even in pretend I was the maid of honor and never the bride! What was up with that?

I was starting to become like that girl in 27 Dresses. I didn't want to go through 27 weddings before finding _the_ one… Oh, lord.

"I would love too," I said.

Rika giggled excitedly on the other line. "Thank you, thank you, thank you! But are you sure you're fine with it? I can get a matron of honor instead."

"It's fine, Rika!" I said.

"Okay. Yoshiyuki and I have scheduled for an appointment at Tomoyo's bridal shop tomorrow at noon," she said. "Do you think you take an hour or two from work?"

"I don't think I can because I've been so behind schedule the last few days," I explained to her. "A lot of my appointments have been pushed back, and if I push back any more, I may be off schedule for a long time."

"Okay. We'll have to make do with the time then, I guess."

"So I'll be meeting up with you and the girls at Tomoyo's bridal shop?"

"Yes. Yoshiyuki's best man will also come."

"Who _is_ the best man?" I asked out of curiosity.

"A friend he has known since high school," she answered. "I haven't met him actually. Yoshiyuki said that we'll all be amazed tomorrow."

At the sound of those words, I hoped with every fiber of my body and every inch of my dear soul that the best man wasn't any man I would know—specifically speaking, Yue or Syaoran. For some reason, when Rika said 'amazed' those two immediately popped into my head. But what were the chances that Rika's soon-to-be husband knew those two? Well, I just recently discovered that my brother and Yue were longtime friends, and I never expected that, not even in a million years. So there was a possibility... I know I've said that life is such a bitch, but it can't be _that_ bitchy... right?

O—o—x—o—O

O—o—x—o—O

_I take it back—life is one hell of a bitch._

"This is Yue," Terada-san said.

Tomoyo, Chiharu and Rika were the only ones who looked at the other man with awe and puppy love eyes. Naoko and I shared the same shocked look on our faces.

"So your name is Yue," said Naoko, recovering from her shock. "How interesting! To think that I've known the mysterious owner of the Paeonia hotel all this time. Would you give me an autograph to put on my club's wall?"

The man grunted.

"You know him, Naoko?" Rika asked.

"No, I know _Yin_," Naoko said. "He comes to my club occasionally, but no one knows his name so Shun named him Yin. My customers more than tripled after his first arrival as more and more people came in to see their luck with him."

Terada-san laughed. "And what are the outcomes?"

Naoko smiled. "No luck, I assure you. Every time he leaves, he leaves alone."

"Not every time," he said, glancing my way with a smirk on his face.

I almost choked on thin air.

"Sakura, are you okay, dear?" Tomoyo patted my back gently. To my dismay, she then whispered very quietly to me, "_You're hiding something_."

Why was she so sharp? It was _almost_ scary.

"Yue-san was it?" Tomoyo looked at Yue and smiled. "Sakura said a lot about you. It's a pleasure to finally meet you. My name is Daidouji Tomoyo."

Tomoyo extended her hand out toward Yue, who looked at it reluctantly. He and Tomoyo shared a long staring contest until Yue eventually shook the woman's hand. "Nice meeting you. I've had the pleasure of working with your mother," he said.

"Yes, she's mentioned that before, I think." Tomoyo flashed him another smile; this one was different from the one before.

Yue smiled back.

I didn't know who was scarier at that moment: Yue or Tomoyo.

"Sakura knows him, too?" Rika asked. "Where was I when all of this happened?"

Chiharu giggled. "Doing wedding things."

Tomoyo suddenly clapped her hands together. "Let's get started already, shall we? We're going to start with the bridesmaids and maid of honor first because Sakura has to run. Rika, have you decided on a wedding theme?"

Rika smiled. "Sweet and simple. We're using white and red roses."

"Okay, how about we do this," said Tomoyo. "Rika, you and the girls look through the catalog, and the men can decide if they want a tux or suit. I made some refreshments for us, I'll go get it. Sakura, won't you lend me a hand?"

That was Tomoyo's code for let's-get-some-private-time-cause-you-have-some-explaining-to-do-sister.

I followed her to the back of the shop.

"Ooh, chocolate cake!" My eyes sparkled at the sight of the cake. "OW!"

Tomoyo suddenly flicked my forehead. "Focus!"

I pouted. "Gosh, Tomoyo..."

"So?" Tomoyo had one hand on her hip. "Start talking. What's with Yue and you?"

"Nothing," I lied.

"Sakura, I saw the look he gave you. Don't you 'nothing' me, missy!"

"Promise me you'll keep a secret?"

Tomoyo gave me a look that said 'Come on. Who are you talking to here?' I was stupid for asking anyway. After all, Tomoyo was the nosiest busybody I knew, next to Takashi.

"Tomoyo, I swear, this has to go in the vault!" I said to her. "You will not tell anybody, or I will cut ties with you!"

The woman gave me a solemn look. "It's that juicy?"

I rolled my eyes. "Yes, it's really big."

"I'm all ears, baby!" she said, smiling from cheek to cheek.

"You promise?" I asked and she nodded. I took in a deep breath and said, quietly, "I slept with him."

"YOU SLEPT WITH HIM!"

I smacked my forehead. So much for the _effing_ vault. We needed to get a new vault—one that was soundproof—because in half a second, three women quickly scurried into the room. Maybe they hadn't heard... Oh, please! Who was I kidding?

"You slept with somebody?" Chiharu was the first to open her mouth.

"WHO?" asked Naoko.

"How could you tell Tomoyo and not us?" demanded Rika. "Aren't we best friends?"

I groaned. "Can we all lower our voices?"

"Seriously, though, who did you sleep with?" Naoko asked again.

"Yue," I said inaudibly.

"What?"

I said a little louder, "Yue."

"We still can't hear you," said Chiharu.

"YUE DAMN IT—YUE!" I shouted in frustration.

Three pair of saucer eyes looked at me like I'd grown another head.

"As in the hot piece of ass out there—" said Naoko, "—who is also your gay patient?"

"He's your patient? You're his therapist? Wait—he's _gay_!" Rika was probably having an internal breakdown.

"Bisexual," I corrected them. "He said he's bisexual."

"Was this after or before you slept with him?" asked Tomoyo, tapping her chin thoughtfully.

"After. I met him at Naoko's bar, then we got drunk and... it just happened," I said.

The girls—all except for Rika—grinned. "How was it?" asked Naoko.

"I don't know! I was too drunk to remember!" I cried.

Tomoyo grinned devilishly. "Or maybe he was just _sooo_ good."

The girls started giggling and laughing. I couldn't take it anymore so I went back out to the front. Bad mistake. Horrible mistake. What I should have done was run out through the back door and tell Rika to forget about this whole maid of honor thing.

The second that I walked through the door leading to the front, I found myself being grabbed by the arm, dragged over to a nearby corner, and pushed up against the wall. I was pinned up against the wall with no way to escape. Before I could open my mouth to scream, my assailant covered my mouth with his rough hand and shushed me. I opened my mouth to bite him, but he bent down and whispered, "Do it and I'll take you on the spot."

I gave him a look that said he would not dare.

He chuckled. "Is that a challenge?" he said against my neck. My heartbeat started to race as his breath trailed over my neck. His lips then found the soft hollow of my throat. I could feel his lips forming into a smirk against my skin. "You will behave, yes?"

I knew my own strength. The battle was lost long before it even started, so I nodded.

"I will uncover your mouth," he said slowly. "Don't do anything stupid, or you'll regret it."

Why did people always tell me not do anything stupid? I didn't think it was fair. They told me not to do anything stupid, but why didn't anyone bother to tell the bastard not to do anything crazy—like, say, pushing an innocent girl like myself and pinning her up against the wall?

"God, what is wrong with you?" I scolded him when I could speak again. "My wrists please?"

"Not a chance in hell," he said. To add emphasis to his words, he tightened his hold on my wrists, making me give me a gasp of pain.

"What do you want, Yue? This cannot be legal!"

"You told them," was his simple answer. Was he mad about my friends knowing?

"I told Tomoyo, but the rest of them overheard," I told him. "It's not like they're going to tell the whole world and ruin your reputation or anything."

"It's not that," he said.

I furrowed my eyebrow at him. "Then what is it?"

"You told them that you were too drunk to remember," he smirked. "Shall I make you remember?"

He suddenly brought his knee between my legs. Okay... freaking out time.

"Y-Yue, what... what are you d-d-doing?" I began to writhe and twist, not liking the idea that I was sandwiched between the man and the wall. Oh, dear, God... why couldn't he just be gay and _not_ bisexual?

"I am making you remember what took place that night," he said huskily. Cupping my face and suddenly leaning closer—too close for my own comfort. "How you had seduced me..."

I gaped at him, mouth ajar, and blinked; staring at him in disbelief. "I did no such thing!"

He chuckled with amusement twinkling in his eyes. "Oh, but you did! And what a fine seductress you are, _Sa-ku-ra_."

I felt a shiver down my spine hearing my name coming from his lips.

"My friends will come out and see this scene, and then I'll sue you for sexual harassment!"

"Look around you, idiot," he said.

And I did.

We were completely hidden behind a rack of wedding dresses. Darn them wedding dresses. Why did they have to be so poofy and big?

"Why are you doing this to me?" I asked him, seriously.

He smirked. "I like to make pretty things cry."

Sadistic bastard.

W-Wait... he thought I was pretty?

_Damn it, Sakura! This is not the time to be flattered!_

"Wouldn't my Syaoran like to know that you were fantasizing about him while being held in my arms?"

His words hit me like a ton of bricks.

OH

MY

GOD.

"You said you didn't remember anything!" I sent him a glare.

He smirked... _AGAIN_! What was it with this guy and smirking?

"I was going to look for you anyway... before tomorrow," he said; completely ignoring what I'd just said. "So we can have a little negotiation. Today proved to be quite a convenient day for me."

Negotiation? He called cornering me up against a wall and threatening to "take me" on the spot _NEGOTIATING_?

"Meet me at Amazon tonight at eleven."

"What makes you think I'll come just cause you tell me to?" I said, glaring at him.

He leaned into my ear, and his tongue traced the rim. My body immediately shuddered as he murmured into my ear, "You _will_ come."

With that, he walked away like nothing had just happened out of the ordinary. My knees went weak, and my whole body slid to the ground. One thing was on my mind...

...If Syaoran was the Devil, what was Yue?

O—o—x—o—O

O—o—x—o—O

Dang it!

I was not some pushover he could order around. I was not scared of him!

…...I was scared of the things he was _capable_ of doing; thus why I showed up at Amazon anyway. I came into the club at quarter 'til eleven, but I didn't see Yue anywhere. I went to ask Shun if he was in one of the private rooms.

"Your hotdog?" the man laughed, giving me a drink. "Haven't seen him tonight yet."

I glowered at the bartender. "My _what_?"

"At first, I thought you two were born enemies but after fifteen drinks or so, whooo-wheee!" he said. "Little ol' Sakura—who knew!"

I blinked at him. "Shun, something tells me I don't want to know the answer, but what happened the other night?"

"You were dead drunk," said the other man, smiling. "When Yin said you've had enough and tried to take your drink away, you suddenly grabbed his crotch and said—and I swear this is word for word—_there's nothing magical about your magical motion meat._"

"I DID WHAT!"

"Then you said something about dirt and giving him dirt, and then you kissed him." He then said, "Yin wasn't smashed yet, but I doubt he could think clearly. So did you two end up doing it?"

I banged my head on the counter.

"Sakura!" Naoko came running up to us. "You are just in time! This total hottie asked me for a job here, and I said he can have one if he passes try out. I told him if he can perform on the stage tonight and get ¥12000 in tips, I'll hire him. He's getting ready to go on."

"Nao-chan, you devil!" Shun said to the woman. "The crowd isn't that good tonight, you might as well straight out reject him if you're asking him to get ¥12000 in tips before hiring him. Not to mention there's more men in this room than women."

Naoko smiled wickedly. "That's exactly why I told him to do this. If he can pull this off, he's a keeper, I tell you. By the way, what brings you to my club, Sakura?"

Shun snickered. "She's waiting for Yin."

"Are you two like dating now?" Naoko asked.

"NO!" I practically screamed at the top of my lungs. "NEVER!"

Where was the man anyway? Why was he always so late for any kind of appointments?

Then the lights suddenly dimmed, and the DJ said, "I hate to interrupt the fun, but our lovely owner wants to say a few words."

Naoko gave me a smile and said, "Well, that's my cue!"

I watched as she got on the stage. "I hope everyone is having a good time. If not, maybe this will make it better," said Naoko. "I've prepared a real treat for you to feast your eyes on tonight! He wants to become an Amazonian, but does he have what it takes? His fate is in your hands tonight, folks! Like what you see? Give him some love. Don't like what you see? Well, be my guest and show him the door! And here he is—!"

The DJ started to play I'm In Love With A Stripper, and the crowd went wild. Suddenly coming out from closed curtains was a face all too familiar. Too _damn_ familiar.

Naoko came back to the bar. She gave me a quick wink. "Didn't I tell you he was a hottie?"

I roughly shook her by the shoulders. "Why is he up there? _What is he doing up there_?"

Naoko was taken by surprise. "He asked for a job as a dancer."

"He's not dancing—HE'S PRACTICALLY STRIPPING!"

He'd started out fully clothed but in just thirty seconds of the song, he was down to just his pants and what was underneath that pair of leather pants that hung low on his hips.

Thank the Lord that Yue wasn't here yet, because I couldn't imagine the kind of reaction he would've had if he were to discover his lover dancing on stage in a nightclub—stripping more than dancing.

...Then amber eyes met mine...

* * *

«—**To be continued**—»


	5. two peas in a pod

「L ◦ O ◦ V ◦ E」  
_and_  
«—OTHER DISASTERS—»

.◦.  
_Beta-reader_: Sakura-chan Master of the Clow

chapter 5: two peas in a pod

O—o—x—o—O

O—o—x—o—O

O—o—x—o—O

O—o—x—o—O

..._Amber eyes met mine_...

And I did not like the smirk on his face as he started to get down in a manner that shouldn't even be possible for any man—gay or straight.

"Oh, hot damn!" someone hollered out from the crowd; man or woman, I could not tell. I was waiting for '_this is my jam!_'...But it did not come, much to my disappointment.

"This cannot happen," I groaned quietly.

Naoko looked at me. "Huh? Did you say something?"

"Reject him," I told her.

"What!" she started to protest. "But he's making money already!"

"Naoko, reject him," I told her again.

"You're serious?"

I looked at her in the eyes. "I'm serious. Turn him down."

The girl sighed. "And what am I supposed to tell him?"

I turned my head toward the stage. "For starter, you can tell him that—oh my Kami-sama!"—My eyes grew as big as saucers— "He is going to be the death of me!"

Syaoran faced the stripping pole and started to climb all the way to the top—the crowd was bewitched by every move he made. Once he was at the top, he wrapped his legs around the metal bar, carefully securing himself to it, then he leaned back so that he was hanging downward, up in the air. I thought I was going to have a nosebleed attack watching him run his hands all over his body as he gradually eased his legs around the pole and gently slid down to the floor until he was practically crawling on the stage in a cat-like motion. The women went wild. As he made his way down the stage and through the crowd, a few ladies—and some guys—did not hesitate to have a feel here and there. The ones who were brave enough to go for a grab generously slipped a few big bucks into his pants, while the "shy" ones handed the money to him personally—in exchange for a quick kiss.

And the disgusting part about it was that his eyes were constantly looking over at me while he did all of this. "What a promiscuous gay," I scoffed.

"He is gay?" both Naoko and Shun cried out; the latter sounded gladder than the former however.

Naoko tugged at the bartender's right ear. "What are you so happy about?"

"N-Nothing!" Smiled Shun.

God... could they be any more obvious? Naoko and Shun had what you would call the weirdest of all weird relationships. It wasn't a secret that Naoko disliked men but didn't mind sleeping with one when one came knocking on her front door—or should it be knocking through? And Shun... well, only God knows what went wrong during the process of his creation—perhaps two or three essential genes went missing, and somewhere along the way he turned out to be the weirdo that he had come to be. He was as straight as a boomerang, but even a blind man could see that he was head over heels devoted to Naoko. If that wasn't weird, I don't know what was. Thinking about their special relationship always made my head spin.

"Here he comes," singsonged Shun.

Before I could react, in just an instant, I was pulled flat against Syaoran; I gasped as our hips made contact. I could feel the heat emitting from his body, oh so hot. The way his chest moved as he breathed. His scent, so intoxicating. A woman could melt to goo in those arms. His pelvis started to grind against mine... slowly... temptingly.

"_Sakura_..." A wave of tingly sensation rushed down my spine hearing him say my name in such an enticing way. "...Like what you see? ..._Or feel_?"

Oh, darn that irresistible smirk on his face.

All of a sudden, I felt like a hundred sharp knives were piercing through my heart. I finally understood what my father and brother meant by the saying: nothing is more dangerous than a woman's jealousy. Thankfully, Syaoran pushed himself away from me before someone had the chance to actually pull a butcher knife out of nowhere and maim me.

He slowly and seductively danced his way onto the bar; standing right in front of me. Syaoran brought himself to his knees and then sat on his heels. He made hearts ache and heads turn simply by bringing himself up and down, his movements were gesturing as if he was riding something...or _someone_ for that matter. He threw his head back while his hands slowly caressed down over his bare chest, across his abdomen, and down to the front of his tight leather pants.

Not once did he take his eyes off of me.

I felt my throat go dry all of a sudden. I wasn't even breathing anymore. My breath caught in my chest, leaving me weak, almost suffocating.

His hands ghosted over the zipper of his pants, and everyone in the club started chanting, "Take it off! Take it off!"

Syaoran gave me a sheepish grin. _Oh, dear Lord_...

The worst part was that I suddenly spotted Yue at the entrance. He hadn't passed the bouncer yet, so there was still some time left to prevent havoc from breaking out. I didn't have any smart ideas, so I imitated what people in anime and action movies do all the time in such a situation—I launched myself over the bar and tackled Syaoran to the floor. We landed on the cold, hard surface... Well, more like Syaoran landed on the floor and I landed on top of him.

"I think you killed him," someone said.

I looked up and saw a row of spectators gathering around the bar. I scurried up on my feet, and there was Yue, standing approximately six or seven feet away amidst the crowd with one brow raised in the air.

"Okay, okay! The show is over," Naoko shooed the crowd away. "Everybody back to enjoying themselves—drinks are on the house tonight!"

I climbed over the bar to get out. Naoko gave me a crooked smile as she looked back and forth between Yue and me before walking off to calm down her customers. You might as well say that '_Ooh-la-la_' was written on her forehead.

"What happened?" asked Yue.

"N-Nothing... I fell," I lied.

He snorted under his breath. "Stupid."

I pretended that I didn't hear the comment and changed the topic instead. "You're late," I said.

He merely grunted. "Get used to it." He started to walk away.

"H-Hey!" I called out to him.

"Sakura!" Shun pulled me back. "...What about...? You know..."

"Take care of _that_ for me," I told him.

I was about to go after Yue when I suddenly remembered whose hands I was leaving Syaoran to. Imagine what any person could do with a partially unconscious Syaoran—oh, the many possibilities! _Taste the rainbow_, they always said.

I quickly added, "Do not touch this one—he's off limits."

The other man pouted rather childishly. "You're no fun."

"Shun..."

"Yeah, yeah, the zoo rule—no petting. Got it," he said.

"Are you coming or not?" growled Yue, standing up ahead with his arms crossed and, what else, a frown on his face. I rolled my eyes—would it kill him to smile once in a while?

_I still can't believe I did it with this man_. Well, people learn from their mistakes, and I learned from mine that alcohol can make you do really stupid things.

O—o—x—o—O

O—o—x—o—O

"Well?" I asked once we were inside one of the club's private rooms. I made sure to put a good distance between us, remembering all too well the unspoken purposes of these private rooms and what took place earlier this afternoon at Tomoyo's shop. Curses on the big guy above for giving me such a weak body when it came to men and _stuff_.

He looked at me, amused. "Well?"

"Didn't you want some kind of negotiation?"

"You are temporarily standing in for Touya, right?"

I nodded my head. "For the rest of this month—about 12 sessions left to go, I think. Believe me—I'm not any happier than you, so don't you give me that look!"

"And do you report to your brother after every session?"

"No," I said.

"Really?" He sounded relieved for some reason.

"Yeah," I replied. "Touya doesn't want to be bothered while on vacation, so I am going to report to him when he comes back."

His frown deepened. "What do you tell him in your..._report_?"

"Everything," I said. "Technically speaking, you and Syaoran are Touya's patients, not mine. I am required to disclose all information to my brother because he is in charge of you."

Yue reached into his suit and pulled out a checkbook and a pen. He then asked me, "How much?"

I didn't know what he was talking about.

"How much?" he asked again for the second time, and I stood dumbfounded by his question. He pinched the bridge of his nose and mumbled something to himself. He looked up at me and said, "How much money will it take to bribe you?"

_Bribe me to do what?_

It took me a few seconds to figure it out.

"You don't want Touya to know!" I exclaimed, pointing a finger at him like I'd caught him red-handed. "Why?"

I thought he was going to blackmail me into doing whatever he wanted. Why wasn't he blackmailing me? He could if he wanted to. So then, why did he want to _pay_ me to shut up? Not that I minded, of course.

"That is none of your business," he said. "How much?"

I walked over to the lounge opposite of where he was sitting and sat down. I met his eyes, stare for stare and glare for glare. I tutted at him. "Now, now, let's not make this more difficult. I am not an unreasonable person. I would just like to know why you don't want me to tell my brother."

He grunted. Minutes went by, and I didn't think he was going to answer me but I was surprised when he finally decided to speak.

"Because it's personal," he said. So soft and gentle was the sound of his voice that it stunned me speechless. The expression on his face was incomprehensible. Whatever was there...was a mystery. His gaze looked so tender and his smile—oh, that smile! I never knew the silver haired man was capable of such a thing—the smile, I mean. I'd never seen such a genuine smile on his face before, except for that one time in Syaoran's car; but even so, there was something different about this smile.

He looked so... so _beautiful_, yet full of sorrow for some reason. A split second later, the smile was replaced by a frown and he went back to being his old self again.

He slid a blank check across the cocktail table over to me. "Here," he said and rose to leave, "take it. Write whatever number you want, I've already signed it."

"I don't want money from you," I tore the check up.

Seeing my ticket to easy street go _Rrr-riiip_ was painful torture—gone was the golden opportunity. Whoever came up with 'it doesn't hurt to be nice' needed to be burned at the stake.

He sat down again. "Then what do you want?"

"Your full cooperation from now on," I said. "That means, you will not make smart-ass comments to dismiss me and you will tell me everything that I need to know to do my job. At the end, I will decide what to tell Touya and what not to tell him."

He gave me a skeptical look.

"You will just have to trust me to make the right judgment." I knew what his doubts were. "I did not finish school with a degree that says two plus two equals fish."

He snorted and said, "I hope not."

"Do you treat everyone as if they're less intelligent than you?"

"No," he replied, "I do not treat everyone as if they are less intelligent than me. More like, you have yet to prove your intelligence to me."

"You're a bastard, you know that?" I continued, "I don't know how Syaoran can stand to be with someone like you. Sure, the guy is the reincarnation of Satan—a little more perverted though—but at least he is sociable... Well, more like he hides his devilish nature behind a friendly mask."

Okay, when I put it like that, Yue actually sounded like a much better person than Syaoran.

"Hn."

"So have we come to an agreement?" I asked.

"On the condition that Touya never hears about us," he said.

Hell, even I wasn't stupid enough to tell my brother I had a one night stand with his longtime buddy. Sure, it would be fun to watch Touya kill Yue, but it wasn't worth it since there was no guarantee that I would go unpunished.

I smiled. "Okay, then! By the way, why didn't you blackmail me instead?"

"Blackmail you with what?"

"You know..." I started stammering, trying hard not to blush. "...You and me... that night... Syaoran's... name..."

He smirked. "You are _that_ interested in him?"

"What? Of course n-not!"

"Relax," he said, "I only said that to get you to come here because I knew that you wouldn't agree to. Stubbornness runs in your blood."

"So that night I really didn't...?"

"You have a very thrilling voice—" His voice was low and husky. "—Tears in your eyes, begging under me..."

I covered my ears. "I can't hear you! I can't hear you! I can't hear you!"

He snorted. "I was only teasing you, baka. All the alcohol in the world won't be able to get me that excited for you."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

The silver haired man merely rolled his eyes. "You're as appealing as a lump of dough."

"A what!" Oh, the nerve of that man! "Well, you're as appealing as... as...!"

"Don't hurt yourself thinking," he remarked sardonically.

I took off one of my heels and threw it at him.

He easily dodged the flying object. "Is that how a professional therapist should act?"

"Oh, shut up," I growled at him. "Should the owner of a big hotel be picking on helpless little girls?"

"You are neither helpless nor little." He gave me the once-over. "Though I can see why you would call yourself little, I would too."

"You horrible, horrible man!" I jumped up from my seat and covered my chest from his eyes. No wonder he and Syaoran were together, they were a perfect match for each other—like two peas in a pod. "I'll see you tomorrow morning! Good day!"

"It's nighttime," he said with a sense of mockery in his voice.

"I said good day!" And I marched out of there.

_What have I done to deserve this?_

I would've left the place immediately had I not remembered a certain unconscious hottie. I tried to push my way to the bar. The club was surprisingly crowded for a Thursday night.

Shun spotted me and shouted, "Yo, peeps, make room in the center!" I could hear his voice over the music—he was _that_ loud. All of a sudden, there was a clear path in front of me.

"Wow, it's like a full house tonight," I said when I reached the bar.

"You know the power of texting—someone texted a friend who texted their friend who texted their sibling who texted their third cousin who texted their ex who texted everyone on their contact list etc., etc., etc."

He offered me a drink.

"No thanks," I said.

"And now people are piling in hoping to see the club's new dancer," he finished with a chuckle.

"What do you mean... Oh my gosh, don't tell me Naoko hired him!"

"Okay," he said, "I won't tell you."

"Where is she?" I asked.

"She left already," he answered. "So did the hottie."

"They left together?"

"Wouldn't Naoko like that to happen!" laughed the other man.

I was suddenly flushed with relief as I heard the news.

Shun looked at me suspiciously. "Who is he?"

"Oh, look at the time!" I pointed to the invisible clock on the wall behind him.

"Sakura..." he sighed.

I grabbed for my purse. "I better get going!"

"...There's no—"

"I'll see you later!" And I power-walked out of there.

"This isn't over yet, you know!"

O—o—x—o—O

O—o—x—o—O

Well, Shun was right on one thing—it wasn't over yet.

When I got to the parking lot, there _he_ was... just sitting on the hood of my car and holding an ice pack over the back of his head.

"Your friend told me you were talking with Yue," he said. "Thanks."

"If you worry about being caught, why are you taking the job?"

"Because this is the hottest club in the city."

"Don't you know that Yue is a regular here?" I said. "And please get off my car."

He slid off the hood to the pavement, saying, "He meets up occasionally with business associates at Amazon. His secretary always has on paper who and when. So I know. I wasn't expecting him to come here today however."

"I see."

He slowly approached me. "Did you two have something to discuss?"

"...Uhm, sorta..."

"What?"

"Ah... that is..." I didn't know what to tell him, but there was no way I could tell him about my agreement with Yue. If Yue had wanted Syaoran to know, he wouldn't have waited to speak with me without his lover's presence. "So, uhm, how's your head?"

"Don't change the topic."

Darn it! And I thought it would work too.

"We didn't talk about anything that is of importance," I said.

"Oh, really?" He stepped toward me.

I took one step back.

"Y-yeah..."

He took one step forward. "That's hard to believe."

"Well, believe it because it's the truth."

He smirked. I found myself taking two steps back for every step he took. "Has anyone told you before what a bad liar you are?"

"Lots," I said. "I can't ever lie the right way, that's why you can be assured that I am telling you the truth."

"Seems logical enough," pondered the other. "Okay, if you say so."

I sighed with relief.

"Well," I said. "I suppose I'll see you tomorrow morning, if you and Yue decide to come."

I walked around him and scurried along to my car. All I had to do then was get into my car and speed away. That was ALL that I had to do.

"Ooh, my head—my aching head!" his words stopped me in my track.

_Just get in the car—he's faking it._

"…Oh, what should I tell my doctor?"

_Get in the car._

"Going to the doctor won't be cheap. Where will I get the money?"

_Ignore him. Ignore him. Ignore him._

"_It was a pretty hard fall_, I would tell my lawyer—" I froze at his words. "—_I was minding my own business and she just threw herself on me. But she was nowhere to be found when I regained consciousness. It was like hit and run. How irresponsible to leave an unconscious person when she's the cause to begin with—I could have died! Who is 'she' you ask? Oh, my therapist._"

"You're going to sue me?" I looked at him incredulously.

"Oh, I wouldn't dream of doing such a thing to my dear, _dear_ therapist," he said. "But, you know, I'm just feeling so fuzzy right now... I'm not thinking straight, so I might do something stupid that I'll regret later on—like, say, filing a lawsuit against my own therapist."

"You're threatening me, aren't you?"

"_What?_ I would never do such a preposterous thing!" He continued, "But I might be able to think more clearly with your help."

That was his nice guy act to say: I'm blackmailing you.

Two peas in a pod indeed.

"What do you want?" I asked.

He said, "You're friends with the owner, right?"

"Yes..."

"I want you to put a word in with your friend."

"Why do you want a job at Amazon anyway?" I asked. Didn't he already work at Paeonia? Even if that wasn't the case, his lover was the owner. Why did he even want to work in a nightclub dancing for God knows what kinds of people? "It's not asking too much to have Yue take care of you financially. Don't tell me the man is that cheap."

"You don't need to know why," he said shortly. "I would keep my distance with Yue if I were you."

"What? Are you jealous or something?"

He snorted. "Yeah, I am."

I was only joking. I didn't expect him to actually answer.

"Don't get way over your head—to him you're nothing more than a substitute," he said. "Get home safely."

He walked away.

What did he even mean by that?

Strange as it sounds, I thought communicating with Yue was much easier than communicating with Syaoran. Yue—despite him being the evil jerk that he was—was straightforward with his words. Syaoran, on the other hand, was a complete mystery.

'Yue' and 'Syaoran.' …Two more things to add to my 'what to blame in case of an early death' list.

O—o—x—o—O

O—o—x—o—O

"So now you're keeping secrets for the both of them?"

I was on the phone with Tomoyo.

"Tomoyo, forget the stupid vault—this goes to the grave."

"I know when to keep a secret. Sheesh, Sakura!" I rolled my eyes. "You're rolling your eyes, aren't you?"

"What? Of course not!"

"Whatever. What are you going to do?" she asked.

I sighed depressingly. "What can I do?"

"Pray that they don't show up tomorrow, and that will be the end to it."

"And if they do show up?"

"Drop on your knees and pray for a miracle."

"Tomoyo, I'm serious! What do I do?"

"Honey, I'm just a fashion designer," she said. "You're the therapist. Now put your noggin to work!"

"Touya said that conventional methods won't work on them... So I have to go with unconventional methods."

"But didn't Yue agree to cooperate?"

"I have a feeling that my definition of cooperating and his will differ by a lot. And Syaoran, well..." I replied. "I'd rather play it safe than be sorry."

"But before you can fix their relationship, you have to know what is wrong to begin with. It seems to me that the task won't be so easy."

"Getting them to talk—by talk, I mean the whole truth and nothing but the truth—is like mission impossible."

"So be a bad doctor!" exclaimed Tomoyo. "Give your patient a prescription without really thinking about their symptoms first. You might prescribe something for stomach pain when it's indigestion they're having, but no one has ever died from that kind of mix-up."

I had to laugh at her analogy. It was... creative.

"Are you suggesting that I should skip step one and go straight to step two?"

"Why not?" she asked. "Touya only said to make their relationship better, right? So what if you do the job a little sloppy?"

I hate to say this but... the girl had a good suggestion going there. Shortcuts are meant to be taken, right? If not, why were there shortcuts in the first place?

"Hohoho!" Uh-Oh. Tomoyo's infamous laugh. Definitely not a good sign. "Why don't you take them on the couples retreat?"

"That..." I started to say slowly, "...is a very, very terrible idea."

Once a month, I would take my patients on a retreat for one whole weekend to give my patients a chance to escape from their hectic every day life. Every person that had been on my retreat found it to be quite effective in mending their relationship together—I'd be damned if I let Yue and Syaoran be the exceptions. Besides, three days and two nights with those two? Not even if my life was at stake.

"The retreat is open to all of your patients," said Tomoyo. "What are you going to do? Convince them not to go, or not tell them about it?"

"Chances of them wanting to go are pretty slim in my opinion," I said. "The retreat is still two weeks away. Besides, I don't even know if they're going to show up tomorrow morning."

"What will you do if they show up?"

"If Touya wants unconventional, I'll give him unconventional."

O—o—x—o—O

O—o—x—o—O

_**Tomoyo Daidouji**__: are they there yet?_  
_**Sakura Kinomoto**__: nope_

I was chatting with Tomoyo on Facebook. It was thirteen minutes till 9:30 AM. A part of me wanted to see them walk through that door in the next thirteen minutes, but another part of me didn't.

_**Tomoyo Daidouji**__: so have you figured out what you are going do?_  
_**Sakura Kinomoto**__: I think... so what are you up to this morning?_  
_**Tomoyo Daidouji**__: the usual, by the way, are you doing anything tonight?_  
_**Sakura Kinomoto**__: why?_  
_**Tomoyo Daidouji**__: dinner with Eriol and me?_  
_**Sakura Kinomoto**__: do you want me to bring wine or dessert?_  
_**Tomoyo Daidouji**__: fudge chocolate cake hmm yummy! :)_

I was about to type my reply when a knock was heard.

"Come in," I called out.

"We're here," announced Syaoran. He and Yue strode into the room with all the charisma in their body, and sat in the same spots as the other day.

"So you've decided?" I asked them.

"We wouldn't be here right now if we hadn't," Yue scolded.

Syaoran beamed me a smile. "I got him out of bed early for you."

"Ah, thank you." I returned his smile.

_Don't be fooled, Sakura. Don't be fooled._

I returned my attention to my computer screen and quickly told Tomoyo that I had to go before logging off.

"So, what's up, doc?" said Syaoran.

Yue rolled his eyes, and I didn't blame him. I was interested in _that_ man?

"Well, I need to confirm that you two know what you are getting into by showing up today," I said and laid two documents on my desk. "These are the terms that you will have to agree to."

* * *

«—**to** **be continued**—»


	6. i'm on a boat

「L ◦ O ◦ V ◦ E」  
_and_  
«—OTHER DISASTERS—»

.◦.  
_Beta-reader_: Sakura-chan Master of the Clow

Chapter 6: i'm on a boat

O—o—x—o—O

O—o—x—o—O

O—o—x—o—O

O—o—x—o—O

Syaoran snorted. "You're joking! Is this really necessary? Ooh, judging from the glare you're giving me, I'm assuming yes."

"What do you mean by '_out-of-office consultations as deemed necessary_''?" Yue asked.

"By signing the paper, you are giving me permission to conduct sessions outside of this office at any time, in addition to our weekly meetings. Of course you will not be charged extra, and the therapist-patient privilege will still be honored," I explained. "However, whether I discuss what we go over out-of-office at our regular meetings or not will be solely up to my discretion. Also, I can consult with both of you or just one of you—whenever and wherever I choose."

"Is that legal?" Syaoran seemed somewhat unnerved by the turn of events.

I shrugged nonchalantly. "I mean, the act is frowned upon but there aren't any laws against it."

"So I could bump into you at the coffee shop and, if you feel like it, that meeting could just turn into one of our sessions?"

"Not without your knowledge, but yes… pretty much." I continued, "And like our regular sessions, the out-of-office sessions will _also_ be recorded."

He smirked. "You're much craftier than I expected."

Yue was being awfully quiet and accommodating.

"Is there anything else you would like me to clarify?" I turned to ask the man.

"Hn."

Without further questions, both men signed the papers. That was much easier than I'd anticipated.

"Well, now that's over," I began. "Let's get started, shall we?"

I pulled out my pen and notepad and, once again, dragged my office chair over to the other side of the room because the two had left me with no place to sit. Not to mention that their overly large sizes made the space seemed much smaller and cramped than usual.

"Why don't we pick up where we left off last time? Before things went wrong… I believe the question was, '_What do you think is complicated about your relationship?_' …Who wants to go first?" I looked up from my notepad, "And no bullshit this time."

Silence.

"Okay, let's hold that question off for now. Tell me what your relationship was like at the beginning, when you've just met. For example, what was your first impression of each other?"

Yue grunted. "He was a little punk-ass brat who followed me everywhere like a shadow."

"Oh, like you yourself was so great," Syaoran scoffed. "As far back as I can remember he has always been his brooding, moody, disdainful self."

I felt like there was a 'but' at the end of his sentence. _But what? But he wasn't as bad as he is now… But I still loved him… But he was very hot?_

"And did you follow Yue like a shadow?"

"I mean, sure, I may have tried to tag along after him, like _most_ of the time, but I wasn't after him _all_ the time." If I didn't know any better, I would say he was blushing. The fact that he _didn't_ follow Yue like a smitten puppy was kind of… cute. "And might I justify my actions by saying that he was always alone by himself. I was only trying to do him a favor."

Yue didn't seem to buy it, and neither did I.

"And you, Yue… what did you think of his _special_ attention towards you?"

"It wasn't special!" Syaoran quickly interjected.

I shrugged him off and focused my attention on Yue. A long silence settled between us. I sighed and said, "Remember our agreement."

I was referring to the agreement Yue and I had made the other night at Amazon, but I was pretty sure Syaoran thought it was the agreement with the paper. And I was also positive that Syaoran was just as eager to hear the other man's response as I was, despite how much he tried to hide it behind a cool face.

"I didn't stop him," the silver-haired finally answered, and although he didn't exactly answer my question, he did give me an answer nevertheless. An answer I was sure made a certain other man feel warm inside.

"Off the top of your head, give me the fondest memory you have of your relationship with each other." It would've been mean of me to ask '_Why didn't you stop him?_' at this point and I didn't want to push the man too much… not yet anyways.

I started to see what Touya had meant by the mushy-feely stuffs not working with these two. At least not when they were in the same room together…

"Forget my last question. Let's talk about sex."

That certainly got a reaction out of them.

"How's your sex life? Did you know that most people can fix their personal relationships by having sex?"

Yue grunted. "I will not discuss my sex life."

Syaoran rolled his eyes. "Not like it's a secret."

"Sex is a natural thing," I stated. "The birds and the bees are a part of life."

"Will you talk about your sex life with Touya around?" Yue suddenly asked.

I shrugged. "He gave me the sex talk, bought me my first contraceptives, forced me to watch horrific BDSM porn when I hit puberty and told me that was how people _usually_ have sex… If I can do anything to make him miserable, then yes… I will actually talk about my sex life with him around."

"I… didn't know he had it that bad." Yue actually looked embarrassed.

Syaoran was laughing. "And how did he react to you losing your virginity?"

"He beat my boyfriend at the time to a pulp then locked himself in his room for a month." I almost felt bad for Touya—keyword being _almost_. "But enough about me… so how often do you have sex?"

"Is this necessary?" asked Yue.

"You'd be surprised by how many problems can be solved easily with sex alone. Most couples I work with just need to find that passion in their relationship again. It was never that they didn't love each other anymore; they'd just lost sight of what was there. Of course that isn't the case for everybody, but studies have shown that sex does have an impact on a person's mental health, how the brain works, and that in turn determines to an extent how the person behaves."

"I haven't… for a while now…" Syaoran muttered under his breath, draping an arm over his eyes as he lay on the couch, feet facing towards me so that Yue couldn't see his expression.

"And how long is _awhile_?"

"I'll answer one of your mushy questions if we stop talking about sex."

"If it isn't working…" Yue started to say.

"It is working just fine!" Syaoran snapped. I hope it was working. It would've been such a shame if it wasn't working—such a damn shame. "You're the last person on this planet I want sex advice from."

"Not cute at all…"

"And you, Yue… I'm assuming because he hasn't in a while, you haven't either?"

The man raised one eyebrow and replied haughtily, "Why do I have to stop just because he can't?"

"I resent you for saying that!" Syaoran shouted, clearly annoyed. "I can too!"

I sweatdropped. "I don't think that is what matters right now… Syaoran, you're okay with him sowing wild oats?"

Yue snorted. "What century are we in?"

I ignored him.

"I… yeah…"

Lie. I knew it. He knew it. And even Yue knew it.

"Let's call it a day. Please give the secretary your preferred contact number on your way out so I can get in touch with you for the out-of-office consultations. In fact, I'm planning to meet up with you some time over the weekend before our Monday session," I said. "The next time I see you, I would like you to answer these questions for me. _Why haven't you left already_? _What do you hope to gain by staying_? And finally, _what will make you happy_?"

"So you're just going to call us out of the blue?"

"I'm not an unreasonable person, Syaoran. I will work with your schedule."

When they left, I felt like a huge boulder had been taken off my chest. The meeting had gone a lot smoother than I'd anticipated. I started to think that maybe it wouldn't be so bad… maybe I could do this after all.

A knock came at the door.

"Come in," I said.

It was Syaoran standing in the doorway. "I may have dropped my phone on the couch."

"Oh, okay."

He closed the door gently behind him and walked over to the couch. He started to search through the cushions. He then said, "Your friend called and turned me down."

I sighed. "Give me a good, honest reason why I should let you work at Amazon as a stripper."

"Entertainer," he corrected. "I'm not stripping."

I rolled my eyes. "Is that what you were _not_ doing the other night?"

"What if I promise to keep my clothes on?"

"Syaoran, I want a good, honest reason."

He stopped fumbling with the cushions. "Forget it. I'm sure some other place will hire me."

"Wait you—" I was cut off by the sound of a phone going off.

He reached into his front pants pocket and took out his phone. "Yeah, I found it. I'm coming down now."

"Syaoran, this conversation isn't over." I said to him just as he was walking out.

And the boulder was back on my chest…

O—o—x—o—O

O—o—x—o—O

"You look like you went to hell and back… twice," Tomoyo laughed upon opening the door to see my face. "Come in."

"Sorry I couldn't make it to lunch today. I brought cake." I paused as I noticed a pair of red pumps on the guest shoe rack by the door. I handed her the box in my hand. "Guest?"

"A very close friend of Eriol from law school," she explained. "They were both mentored by Nakuru."

"And?" I followed her down the hallway into the kitchen.

"And what?" the black head replied nonchalantly, "There is no 'and', Sakura."

I rolled my eyes. "Oh, come on, Tomoyo! You're my best friend _and_ we're cousins. I've known you for years! And don't you make me use the therapist card, because I do carry a wallet-sized copy of my degree with me everywhere, just so you know."

She laughed.

"Okay. Well—" She paused and gestured for me to come closer. "It's just that—she is so beautiful, and I don't mean the kind of 'beautiful' people throw into a compliment out of obligation. I mean—she is beautiful."

"Okay, so I'm assuming you are saying that she is better looking than you." It came out more of a question than a statement.

"Yes."

"Tomoyo, I hardly think Eriol will suddenly divorce you because this woman is, as you said, _beautiful_."

She let out a quiet sigh as she checked on the oven. "Do you remember what I told you in the first month that Eriol and I dated?"

"You said something about him never once having a serious relationship."

"But he had a long, very long unrequited love," she added.

"And you think it's her?"

She started to toss the salad. "I can't explain it, but I just had this gut feeling when I first saw her. I just knew it."

"Tomoyo, that was years ago," I tried to comfort her. "Eriol married you because he loves you."

"I just don't understand why she's suddenly here. From what he told me, she moved out of the country right after they graduated from law school." She went on with the salad, unseeingly. "They hardly kept in touch, if at all. I mean, I get that she is in the country now because she has business to take care of. I'm not saying she can't be in the country. Just, why _here_—in _our_ home?"

She stirred the salad more vigorously still. I noticed one of the eggs disintegrating. I knew I had to put a stop to her hysteria before there was going to be no salad for dinner.

"Tomoyo," I quickly moved to grab her hands. "Tomoyo, stop… stop, honey, just stop!"

"Oh, Sakura, I hate feeling like this!" She started to cry. "I know I have nothing to worry about, but the green-eyed monster inside of me won't go away. I just… I…"

I was thankful that Eriol chose that very moment to walk into the kitchen. He'd rushed over from the door before I could even count to one.

"What happened?" he asked. If Tomoyo couldn't see the truth in his eyes, I really needed to slap some sense into her, literally.

"I'm just letting you know that you won't find another girl like me!" she shouted before throwing herself into his arms.

I took that as my cue to leave. Besides, I had to check out this 'beautiful' chick. I had never seen Tomoyo look down on her own looks before—I mean her name appeared in one of those 'most beautiful' lists like every year for God's sake! Tomoyo had always known she was _that_ much better-looking than the average women, she didn't flaunt this fact in anyone's face, but she didn't hide the pride that she felt either. So for the amethyst-eyed, black-haired beauty to feel slightly threatened by another woman's looks, the woman had better looked like Aphrodite.

She smiled warmly when I entered the living room.

"Oh! You must be Sakura-chan! Li Meiling." She extended her hand out to me and continued, "What luck it is to meet you tonight! I've been meaning to meet up with you before I leave the country."

Tomoyo was right. This woman was _beautiful_. She had long black hair and velvet-lashed, almond-shaped eyes. Her figure was lean but generously curved in all the right places, not to mention that she stood at nearly six feet with pale, porcelain skin. No doubt people mistook her for a supermodel all the time. She could've given Aphrodite a run for her money.

I returned the smile and shook her hand. "Eriol and Tomoyo will take a while. But, I don't get what you mean. How would you know about me?"

_Wait… what did she say her name was?_

Li Meiling…

That name and that level of good looks could only mean one thing…

I almost wished a hole would suddenly appear out of nowhere and swallow me up. Was the world this small?

"Are you, by any chance, related to Li Syaoran?"

"We're cousins. I heard from Touya that he left Syaoran and Yue in your care until he gets back." She gave me a sympathetic look. "I can't imagine them giving you an easy time."

I just smiled politely.

"To tell you the truth, when Touya told me that he would be going on vacation—with the situation being like this and all—I was pissed. I swore at him for being selfish, but after having had enough time to cool down, I truly believe he made the right decision by going away. If Touya has faith in you, Sakura, then so do I."

I… was confused. What was the situation? _Damn_. After hearing what she said, how was I supposed to tell her that I had absolutely no idea what to do with Syaoran and Yue? They were more complicated than a hundred women going through menopause combined. I didn't know what my brother was thinking by leaving them with me. Did he honestly think that I could help their relationship?

O—o—x—o—O

O—o—x—o—O

"Are you sure, Sakura?"

I was on the phone with Naoko the next morning while waiting at a café for Li Meiling to show up. Right before we parted the previous night, she asked if I could meet up with her to discuss some matters concerning Syaoran and Yue.

"Yes. He seems intent on working at a nightclub, and don't ask me why," I said. "I figure since he'll just try another club, might as well let him work at yours where you can keep an eye on him for me."

"Oooh!" the other woman squealed enthusiastically on the other line. "I'm so glad you said that! To be honest, I was bummed out about losing such a good money-making opportunity."

"Naoko, there are rules. He is not allowed to take his clothes off—ever," I added for emphasis. "He is not to have _clienteles_. I'm sure you know what I mean. And he is only to be scheduled to work on days you are there to watch the club. That also means you are not to leave and go on one of your rendezvous while he is working."

"Whaaaaaat! Sakura, t-that's too much!"

"Those are my terms," I firmly stood my ground. "You will do it, won't you?"

She sighed heavily into the phone. "When you say it like that, how can I refuse you? You're evil, Sakura."

"Oh thank you, thank you, thank you! I owe you big time!"

"BUT..! Only if you agree to watch the club once in a while so I can have my fun."

I giggled. "No problem."

"By the way… I heard it through the grapevine that _he_ is coming back soon."

My breath hitched.

"Sakura, are you there?"

"Has it been a year already?" I said.

"How are you feeling? I'm worried what will happen to you when he comes back."

I could hear the concern in her voice.

"I'm fine. Don't worry about me. He and I can still be friends," I replied.

She spoke after a short pause. "You were sex friends for five years. Forgive me for being blunt, but it's impossible for you two to be just friends. You know that right?"

"I know what you mean, but… I want to believe that we can still be _just_ friends."

"I'm just worried about you, Sakura—we all are. The girls and I don't want to see you go back to that kind of life again."

"I know," I said. "Don't worry. Never again will I wear my heart on my sleeve."

"So you're okay?"

I didn't know if I was okay. How I felt then and how I was going to feel much later were two different things. I didn't know time could go by so fast… A year had passed by so quickly.

I would never forget that night.

"_I'm leaving tomorrow," he had said._

_I pushed myself up from his chest. "Where are you going?"_

_He let out a hiss and grabbed for my hips. "Don't stop."_

_I smacked his hands away and quickly slid off the bed. He caught me by the waist and threw me back on to the bed, quite effortlessly might I add. I landed on the soft mattress with a yelp, and before I could react to roll to the other side to escape, he'd already pressed his body firmly on top of mine. Being twice my size, his weight was overbearing. I wiggled around for a bit then decided to give up._

"_You didn't even leave me any room to knee you in the balls," I said in protest._

_He laughed… the sound deep and rich._

_He leaned down and gently kissed my forehead. Then he said, "Marry me."_

_My heart skipped a beat._

"_W-What are you…?"_

_He shushed me. "When you can't find that special man who will love you unconditionally… when you don't want to be alone anymore… when you just __**can't**__ be alone… then marry me. I'll be with you, 'til death do us part. I'll make you the happiest woman in the world."_

"_Yuichi…"_

"_But know that the happiness I speak of will be nothing but an illusion—a very elaborate lie."_

_I wanted to cry._

"…_Is it so hard?"_

_He rolled off of me onto his back. "I can't commit to one woman, Sakura. You've known this since the beginning."_

"_You're not your father…" I said to him. "You're not that man, and I'm not your mother... You're not fated to hurt everybody around you or be alone. Can't you see that?"_

"_The apple doesn't fall far from the tree, Sakura."_

"_You aggravating man…!" I grabbed the pillow from under me and whacked him hard in the face repeatedly. "Why must you be so stubborn and hardheaded?"_

_I hit him in the chest, taking out my anger and sadness on him, while the tears I fought to control started to fall. He let me hit him, as he knew he deserved it. The hitting went on for a good half hour, until he could tell I was beginning to lose my strength and I finally broke down into loud, gut-wrenching sobs. He held me in his arms and let me cry against his chest._

"_I love you…"_

_I must've said those words to him at least a thousand times over the years. Each time, he would kiss me softly on the lips and then whisper into my ear, 'I love you too.'_

_That night, however, he did not._

"Sakura? Hello?"

I snapped out of my thoughts. "Oh, sorry… I dozed off for a minute."

"You're not okay, are you?" Her voice sounded sad and almost pained.

"I'm okay, Naoko. Please don't worry too much, I'll be fine," I tried to reassure her. "Anyways, back to Syaoran, I'll be relying on you."

"Yeah, yeah… For all this trouble, he better bring in some serious dough."

"Well, I'll let you get back to sleep," I said. "The person I'm meeting is here. I'll see you later."

Meiling looked breathtaking, if not even more beautiful than the last time I'd seen her, and she was only wearing an _extremely_ simple white sundress. God… I hated her. Not hate—like _literally_… you know.

"Sakura-chan, sorry for being so late!" She was all smile and sunshine. "I hope you didn't have to wait long. I had to take care of some business before coming here, I'm so sorry. I would've called, but I forgot to get your number last night."

It was hard not to smile back at her. "It's okay. I didn't wait long, and besides, the weather is so nice I'd be crazy to complain!"

We started off with polite small talk.

"What was it like having Nakuru as a mentor?" I'd asked.

She scrunched her nose. "Truthfully…? Eriol and I nicknamed her 'The Witch'."

"What! Noooo!" I laughed.

"I can't imagine what Eriol was thinking to _want_ to have her as his boss. I ran as far away from that woman as possible after graduating. Why do you think I moved back to China?" If not for the quick wink at the end, I would've thought she was being serious. "But don't tell her."

Li Meiling was starting to grow on me. I could see why Eriol had such a long unrequited love, and why a woman like Tomoyo would feel _threatened_; I wouldn't want Li Meiling on my turf either.

"If you don't mind me saying," I began slowly, and waited for the server to give Meiling her drink while behaving like a boy in primary school smitten by his first crush. I thought he was going to melt into a puddle from her smiling at him. I continued once he was gone, "I have a hard time believing a smart woman like yourself would be oblivious to a very close friend _liking_ you for so many years."

She took a sip of her drink and smiled. "I knew. Eriol knew that I knew, and I knew that he knew I knew, so perhaps that is the reason why neither of us did anything about it. Besides, I'd already liked someone before we even met. While he was holding an unrequited love, so was I… You can see why we're such good friends now. So please tell Tomoyo she has nothing to fret over."

I chuckled. "Did she have it written all over her face?"

"I think it's an endearing trait," she said. "To be so expressive, that is."

"So what did you want to talk about?" I asked, getting to the heart of the matter.

"How is your progress with Syaoran and Yue?"

"To be honest with you, I don't know how to answer that," I smiled sheepishly. "I didn't know how to handle them until yesterday, and even so, I still don't know what I will do with them."

"I see… They can be very difficult people."

I took the opportunity to ask, "Do you know what went wrong in their relationship? From what I've been observing, they obviously care for one another, and they have a very close understanding of each other so I can't say that they have a _bad_ relationship at all."

"I'm afraid there isn't a whole lot I can tell that you don't already know." Seeing a confused look on my face, she quickly added, "When I contacted Touya for help, I made sure to transfer all of their files from past psychologists."

Oh… right, their files… the information contained within a certain manila folder that was accidentally fed into the shredder… by me. I'd forgotten everything about that.

_Note to self: Replace files._

I just had to sneak into Touya's office and gain access to the patient records database on his computer, and then print out a new copy. Easy, right?

I was doomed.

"They both think the other person is better off without them. You can see how your brother was my last resort, although I was very reluctant…"

"If I'd learned anything in my years of being a couples therapist, it is that the single most stupid thing people can do is try to be gallant," I sneered. "Giving up without even trying does not equal to 'sacrificing' for the better good. That kind of people is cowardice in my opinion—I rather dislike them very much."

Meiling was surprised by my reaction. "Sakura-chan?"

Naoko just had to tell me about _him_ returning soon.

I forced up a smile. "It's nothing. How was Touya your last resort?"

The woman stared so intently at the cup of coffee in front of her with such contempt burning in her eyes, for a minute I thought perhaps the cup would suddenly explode. "He's not exactly my favorite person… you wouldn't like someone who stole the person you love either, would you?" She chuckled slightly. "Then again, I am probably just very petty and can't let go of a grudge. But don't get me wrong—I don't hate your brother, Sakura-chan."

_Stole the person… love…? Nakuru…?_

"Meiling-san…"

"Oh please leave out the honorific! Plain old Meiling will do," she smiled. "But ah, I'm getting off topic, aren't I? I would like to request a favor from you, Sakura-chan. I know you have to look into their past to help them, but if it is possible, can you stay within the past ten years? Don't ask either of them anything beyond ten years ago."

"Why?" I asked. "If it's important to their relationship, then it's very beneficial if I—"

"It's not important—" she quickly interjected; sounding a bit peeved. "—I'm sorry. It's history. Whether you bring it up or not, I don't think it will make much of a difference given the circumstances, doing more harm even…"

I really couldn't wait for the month to be over so I could get my normal life back, a time when everything made perfect sense like black and white.

O—o—x—o—O

O—o—x—o—O

"Ohh! This is delicious! Yukito, you have outdone yourself yet again!" I exclaimed, happy as a clam, even if said man wasn't present in the room. "This," I said in between bites, "is the best cake I've ever eaten."

"You said the exact same thing after tasting the other cakes," drawled Yue lazily, snorting. We were sitting in his _very_ big office.

Apparently Meiling had taken care of all her business and her plane was leaving soon, so we said our goodbyes after she made her strange request. Then I decided to go to Paeonia and get the out-of-office consultations with Syaoran and Yue over with. I was arriving just as Syaoran was leaving—well, more like running to his car. I didn't bother to chase after him since I'd planned on meeting with them individually anyway. However, I had hoped to meet with Syaoran first… he was just easier on the eye… whereas Yue looked stoic all the time. No matter how good looking he was, and he was _extremely_ good looking, there was only so much of him I could handle."It's like eating pineapples," I explained to the man when he casually remarked that I seemed disappointed that Syaoran couldn't be there. "Pineapples are delicious, but the acidity gets you after you've eaten so much and your tongue stings like a mofo."

He didn't seem at all impressed by my analogy. We were about to go into another bicker when Yukito came in to remind Yue that they still had to decide on the desserts menu for the hotel. I discovered that Syaoran was normally in charge of the hotel's menu, but since he was out at the moment and they really needed to settle on the new menu soon, the task of taste-testing the desserts fell on Yue's shoulders… who abhorred sweets, judging from the disgruntled look on his face. He'd just sat there and stared at the untouched plates of sweets for an hour before I decided to save the day.

"Well, then this one is better than the ones before it," I retorted. "Isn't that obvious?"

"Hn." He rolled his eyes. "Don't just sit there and eat like a pig."

"How am I supposed to help decide which pastries to put on the menu without tasting every one of them first, huh? For someone who always acts like he's so smart, you sure are stupid." I took a bite of another pastry, and I let out a deep moan as an uncontrollable surge of pleasure shot through me. "Ohh, God… this is Heaven. You have to try some!"

He looked like I suggested eating a dog or something, "No."

"It won't kill you." I looked at him suspiciously. "Or will it?"

"Just do your job," he grumbled.

"One bite… You have to try this one at least!" I pressed; holding one of the petit fours to his lips. "Come on, open up!"

He nearly slapped my hand away but just when he opened his mouth to protest, I took the opportunity to shove the pastry into his mouth. He choked and immediately spat it out onto the floor. He gargled a big gulp from my glass of water and spat everything on the floor as well.

"You are cleaning that up," he deadpanned.

"You are impossible." I marveled at his extremity. "It's your loss then, more for me. You don't know what you're missing. A life depraved of sweets… no wonder you're so emotionless."

I reached for an éclair and took a bite, the chocolate and cream melted so heavenly in my mouth.

"Honestly it's a sin for pastry to taste so much better than sex." I hadn't meant to voice my thought out loud. Yue gave me a very amused smirk. "What?"

I took another bite of my éclair, and because I wasn't paying any attention to the man sitting across the desk from me, I didn't notice him moving—well, _leaning_ over. When I did notice, it was already too late. The man had his mouth over mine, and his hand was firmly placed behind the back of my head. I didn't know which was sweeter, the éclair or him. His scent filled my nostrils and all I could do was breathe him in.

His smell was damn intoxicating.

He pulled back, his face mere inches away from mine; the irritating smirk still plastered on his face.

"Hn. What do you know? I didn't die after all," he mused.

If that was his attempt at humor, I could finally understand why he preferred to wear a stoic expression all the time.

"What was that?" I demanded to know.

He shrugged. "I wanted to see if it was indeed better than sex."

The slap across his face echoed through the silent room like thunder during a midnight storm. He stared at me as if I'd gone crazy. God… if there wasn't a desk separating the two of us, I would've delivered a deathly blow to his family jewels. There were so many hot emotions running through me the desk probably wouldn't have even mattered if it had come down to that. Right then I just wanted to shred his handsome face to pieces.

I was seriously contemplating on doing just that when his next words left me completely stupefied.

"You want to have dinner with me?"

* * *

«—**to be continued**—»


	7. rock the boat

Special thanks to my new beta-reader: **Sakura-chan Master of the Clow** ! Thanks for your hard work! :D

* * *

「L ◦ O ◦ V ◦ E」  
_and_  
«—OTHER DISASTERS—»

Chapter 7: rock the boat

O—o—x—o—O

O—o—x—o—O

O—o—x—o—O

O—o—x—o—O

"You want to have dinner with me?"

I had to make sure I'd heard him right so I asked, "Did you hurt yourself in the head today or something?"

"What?" I didn't know if he was trying to act like he really didn't know what I was talking about, or if he was really… truly _that_ irritating.

"Why are you asking me out on a date?" I questioned, staring down at my lap because I was too embarrassed to look at the man directly. My ears picked up a little cough and I snapped my head in his direction, frowning when I observed that he was attempting to suppress a laugh. His smile was hidden behind a fist, but I could still see it. Annoyed, I was ready to snap at him when he spoke up.

"And why are you assuming it's a date?" he calmly retorted, not bothering to hide the amusement in his voice. "_Did_ I ask you on a date? If my memory serves me correctly, I said _dinner_."

"Dinner, lunch, coffee—they're all the same!" I mumbled under my breath. _You have to be an idiot to not know they all mean only one thing…_ "… And you kissed me."

I slapped a hand to my mouth when I heard the words come out. _Stupid, stupid, stupid!_ I sounded like a giddy high school girl being asked to the prom.

"Come here," he suddenly said.

"What?"

He pushed his chair back and stood up.

"Come here. I want to show you something out the window," he explained upon seeing the skeptical expression on my face.

"I don't think that's necessary," I insisted. "I'll just sit right here."

He motioned for me to come over with his index finger. His eyes had _that_ look—you know, one of those '_come here or I'll drag you over_' looks. I sighed and reluctantly walked over to him. It suddenly dawned on me how tall he really was, and somehow it made me feel even smaller in more than one way. The last time I was this close and personal with him was at Tomoyo's shop, but he had bent down to my eye-level the entire time, so seeing his true height at such a close distance was quite intimidating. He towered over my five-feet-five self like the Empire State building over New York City. I didn't doubt for a minute that he was the perfect man in the eyes of most women on this planet. And he knew it too.

He leaned down and whispered into my ear, "If I could make you come with just one finger, imagine what I can do with the rest of my body."

I shivered a bit and spoke, "Well… what did you want to show me?"

"I was going to show you what a _real_ kiss is like." He sat back down in his chair with a condescending chuckle. "But I'm afraid you might just rip my head—or something else—off."

I frowned at his revelation. I glared him down and started to come closer to him; no doubt he thought I was getting ready to slap him again. He was toying with me, and it pissed me off. Hell, everything about him made me want to grind my teeth and punch the wall or him in the face, preferably the latter. But no, I was going for a different approach this time.

When he was unprepared, I took the opportunity to straddle him on the chair. He tried to pull down the hem of my skirt because it had risen up when I was situating myself on his lap. I forced back the smile that threatened to spread across my lips from seeing such an awkward gesture coming from him. It was… oddly _cute_. I leaned forward and pressed my breasts against his chest, tracing my index finger up and down his Adam's apple very lightly.

"You're not the only one with a bag of tricks." I took his mouth in a kiss that demanded about a thousand things, a kiss so carnal it would leave him breathless, so sensual and passionate his toes would curl, so possessive that his heart would throb—a kiss so calculated, so manipulative, so… _like him_.

_He_ had always kissed me in that manner.

A picture of hazelnut eyes gazing warmly at me was lurking at the back of my mind, and I felt as though I was holding locks of light-brown hair in my fingertips once again.

_What am I doing?_

I pulled away from the kiss slowly. When did I start crying? I hadn't cried in so long, I didn't know I was capable of such a thing anymore…

"Tch. There's a reason why you don't play with fire, stupid." A sour expression rested on his otherwise handsome face—although he was still pretty darn handsome. "Little kids shouldn't play with big toys."

"Pssh! I hope you're not insinuating what I think you are." I wiped my tears and tried to force up a smile. "Don't get too conceited. I just remembered an unhappy event. It has nothing to do with you."

"Are you done with your revenge?" he asked monotonously. "My thighs are getting sore, and you're not exactly light."

I pounded my fists against his chest. "I'm not playing with you anymore."

"Is that what you were doing?" He slapped my _derriere_ just as I was getting off of him, and pulled me back into his lap. "You still haven't answered me."

I had to think for a bit which question he was referring to.

"Dinner?"

"My, my, my… are you asking me on a date?"

I couldn't help it. I laughed.

"Not a date?" I asked.

"Not a date."

"… Tonight…?"

"I have wasted enough precious time on you today," he responded in his usual _holier-than-thou _attitude. "I have too much work to play with you tonight."

The man was a dick… A very charming dick.

"Leave tomorrow night free on your schedule," he said, or rather commanded.

I rolled my eyes.

"What about Syaoran?" I hadn't lost all senses yet. "Are you forgetting that I'm your therapist?"

"What about him?" I couldn't believe how easily those words had come out of his mouth. I was tempted to slap him again, this time for Syaoran's sake. "He and I will go our separate ways… sooner or later… What does it matter?"

"But… but isn't it better to try than not try at all?" I found myself saying.

He lifted my chin so that I would look at him. He leaned closer and I swear his voice dropped an octave. "And what do you think I'm doing here?"

O—o—x—o—O

O—o—x—o—O

"He wants you," were Tomoyo's words of wisdom. "He's your only laid in a whole year since, well, _him_—whose name shall not be mentioned in my presence, or I swear I will look up which plane he will be flying on and blow it up. It sounds to me as if their relationship is going to end anyways, so why not?"

"My integrity," I reasoned. "That's why not."

"Oh come on, Sakura! It's time to think about _your_ own happiness once in a while." Chiharu had Tomoyo's back apparently.

"I will not date one of my patients while I am trying to save their relationship!"

"He said it isn't a date," Naoko pointed out.

The other girls started scoffing.

"He wants you," Tomoyo said again.

I sighed. "Rika, what do you think? Be my voice of reason."

"Sakura, I understand where you are coming from… and you are right. It isn't right for you to date Yue at all under such circumstances—you will be wronging Syaoran, and we know your conscience won't let you sleep at night." I knew if any of the girls could see the most right thing to do, it would be Rika. "That is what I would say if I was a stranger. But as a friend who knows what you've been through, I must say that I desperately want you to be able to move on with your life—you haven't desired for any man since _he_ left, and from what I'm hearing, you want _this_ man. So if you must take someone else's lover, I will bear the guilt with you if it will finally make you happy. I will find this Syaoran, get on my knees and apologize to him. I will beg him if I must."

I knew my friends were disturbed by my relationship with Yuichi, but I hadn't known the extent of it. I felt horrible for putting them through such angst. I was truly thankful for being blessed with such good friends.

"Thank you…" I choked back the tears. "Thank you… I love you guys so much."

O—o—x—o—O

O—o—x—o—O

"So what made you change your mind?"

I couldn't believe it. I was sitting in one of them fancy-schmancy restaurants that cost like ¥15,000 per person, and that was just the starting price—of course Yue had to go above and beyond. He'd picked me up in an expensive looking two-door sports car and taken me to a super-duper expensive restaurant. I was expecting dinner at a small local bistro or something along that line, not a night of royalty. I felt like a pauper next to him. It didn't help that everyone else, minus the restaurant's employees, looked filthy rich as well—hell, the employees probably earned more from tips than I did working for Touya! And not to mention that they were all looking over at our table.

He noticed my uneasiness and asked, "What's wrong?"

"Do you always draw so much attention wherever you go?" I whispered quietly to him.

The other customers quickly looked away when Yue sent bone-chilling daggers in their direction. He wagged for our waitress to come over and whispered something into her ear. She left momentarily and came back with a middle-aged man in a suit; I assumed he was either the owner or manager of the restaurant. Yue said something to the man—I couldn't hear or make out the words from reading his lips—well, whatever he said, the other man seemed troubled but he eventually bowed politely to Yue and walked away. The man then went to all the other tables, and was bowing to the other customers as every single person got up to leave, after they sent yet more curious glances in our direction that is.

"What did you do?" I finally asked when it was just the two of us dining in the entire restaurant.

"I bought out the place for the night," he had said it so casually, like it was no problem at all… like it was nothing out of the ordinary, and he was used to buying out expensive ass restaurants like every other night or something just for the heck of it.

I didn't know whether to be amazed or annoyed.

"You are unbelievable…" I muttered.

"Thank you."

"It wasn't a compliment," I grumbled. He really was unbelievable. "Why are we even eating here when you have a five-star chef at your hotel?"

"Your brother said the same thing, back when we were in college. He always asked why I had to go out and eat when there was a French cook back at my place."

Honestly… the more I learned about him, the more I hated just how _rich_ he was. But I perked up at the mention of my brother.

"Oh yeah, you and Touya were very good friends apparently," I remarked. "Why didn't he ever bring you home? Or tell us about you for that matter…"

He merely shrugged. "He said he was embarrassed."

I was surprised to hear that. "Of our family… because we're poor compared to _you_?"

"No." He shook his head with a low chuckle. "Of me. He said I was too weird—that I was from another world completely."

I didn't know how to tell the man that he was kind of like a being from another world. He was too cocky, too much of an asshole, too rich, too _fucking_ good-looking—he was just _too_ much of everything to be an inhabitant of Earth. It wasn't normal. I'd be embarrassed to be seen in public with him just because being next to him could really make any person look like shit if they weren't _that_ rich, _that_ good-looking, and pretty much everything that he was. My mother probably would've taken Touya out of the family registry and replaced him with Yue if she'd met the man—let's just say Okaa-san adored men who look like they'd just fallen right out of a shoujo manga or Asian drama show, God bless her.

I mean, Syaoran was better-looking than most men, but he wasn't so good-looking that he would be seen as "too good to be true." Even Touya had been called extremely handsome by a lot of women and he failed in comparison to Syaoran, so for Syaoran to be less good-looking than Yue, you know the silver-haired man had to be abnormal… and an alien.

Yes, that was the only logical conclusion.

"You never answered my first question," he interrupted my train of thoughts. I stared at him blankly. "What made you change your mind?"

_Ohh… that!_

"I didn't see any harm in having dinner with you. After all, this isn't a date, like you said… And besides, I didn't get a chance to actually carry out our out-of-office session," I lied. I couldn't have possibly told him the truth—that I was only trying to see if he could be the one to help me move on with my life… to finally be happy again.

"Why haven't I left already? What do I hope to gain by staying? And what will make me happy?"

"What?"

"The questions you told us to reflect on," he answered. "I haven't left already because I can't… at least, not yet. I don't hope to gain anything, because I'm not staying. And what will make me happy? I want something I can't have, so I suppose happiness isn't in my reach."

"What do you mean you are not staying?" I questioned. "If you two are so set on leaving, why are you even going through counseling? I don't understand you two at all."

"He wants something I can't give." He took a sip of his wine. "And I have a void he can't replace. It really is that simple. If you must know, we didn't volunteer ourselves for counseling."

At the beginning, they did mention that it was Meiling's idea…

"How many years have you had these thoughts?" He didn't answer. "Then let me ask you…" I looked directly into his eyes, "What are you doing with me? If you have a void he can't replace, do you think I can?"

"What about you?" he retorted. "Weren't you thinking of someone else while kissing me?"

I laughed bitterly. "What is this? You lick my wound and I lick yours? Is that how it'll work?"

"Hn…"

"You're a really hateful man," I murmured so quietly, I didn't know if he'd heard me. He didn't show any sign that he did, for he didn't say anything. We continued to eat in silence for a very long time. I didn't know how much time passed.

I just kept eating and eating and eating in order to fight back the tears. I didn't know what was wrong with me. Why had I become such a crybaby all of a sudden?

Then out of nowhere, "I wouldn't want you to love me…" It came almost as a whisper.

So he had heard.

"You're just like _him_," I was saying that to myself more than to him.

I didn't regret having dinner with Yue. The experience had opened my eyes and allowed me to see what was there, well _wasn't_ there to be exact. I knew that I was physically attracted to the man—Lord, who wouldn't be? He was sex on legs.

But there was nothing beyond that attraction.

I didn't want another Yuichi…

I didn't want to love somebody who didn't love me back.

The rest of dinner had been strangely quiet, except for when the check came and I insisted on seeing it. After a few minutes of bickering, I finally wrestled the check from his hands, and I nearly fainted upon seeing the total—there were eight digits, eight _freaking_ digits. I didn't even earn half of that in a year!

"I told you it would not make you feel good," he scolded matter-of-factly once we were in the car, and he was driving me home.

"How rich are you?" I asked.

"It's impolite to ask someone about money."

I snorted. "Come on! Tell me! Are you like the richest man in the country or something?"

It actually seemed like he was thinking about it. After a while, he finally answered, "No. There are a lot more people who are wealthier than I am."

"Really? That's a surprise… and here I thought you could probably rule the country."

"Even I have my limits."

I laughed. "So you do have some human qualities after all!"

I decided that I did like the man after all—the normal kind of 'like' that is. He wasn't such a horrible man… surprisingly. I didn't realize 'til that night that I had been waiting for the same old thing… that I hadn't changed at all from the person that I was at the time that my heart was cruelly shattered into a million pieces… that I was still standing at the airport, waiting for his plane to miraculously turn around, for him to come back and pick up the pieces. All this time I'd been waiting for someone else to mend my broken heart.

But no more… No more… _I'll mend it myself_.

So in a way, by realizing that there would be nothing in the future for Yue and me, the man had given me the courage to move a step forward with my life.

"Yue…?"

"What is it?"

I leaned over from my seat and kissed him on the cheek. "Thank you… for a very wonderful night."

"I thought you said this wasn't a date."

"It's not," I played along. "That's why I kissed you now and not after you've walked me to my door."

"So I have to walk you to your door?"

"Only if it's a date… but it's not, right?"

Even in the dark, I didn't miss the smirk on his face. I wondered what he could be thinking that very moment.

I looked out the window and took in the night view. The city of Tomoeda was especially beautiful at night-time with all the lights, people wondering the streets even at this hour, and the late-night street vendors. I wondered if Yue would agree to stop and walk around for a while. I laughed at the idea—of course the man would mind. _After all_, I thought while smiling, _this isn't a date_…

We were at a red light when I noticed a strangely familiar figure in the crowd of people on the sidewalk. He was trying to get away from someone. A man in a hoodie was following closely behind him, and he was holding something in his hands. A weapon…? No, that wasn't it. Syaoran had now turned to the man and was yelling at him while gesturing for him to go away.

"Hey…" I tugged on Yue's arm to get his attention. "Isn't that Syaoran?"

Yue leaned over and looked in the direction I was pointing.

"Those damn dogs!"

He let out a few more curses and quickly put the car into park before getting out of the car and storming over to where Syaoran was standing. Syaoran stopped yelling at the man that was following him when he saw Yue approaching. The other man also turned his attention to Yue and started to ask him something, but the silver-haired man walked completely past him without a single care. In one swift movement, Yue took off his blazer and covered Syaoran's head with it. The stranger then took the opportunity to snap photos of Yue and Syaoran together. _Paparazzi_…? Yue grabbed for the camera and smashed it onto the ground, and then he lunged at the paparazzi. He punched the man in the face again and again and again. Syaoran tried to pull Yue away to no avail.

I didn't know what to do.

Cars started to honk like crazy behind me and Yue looked like he was going to kill the man. Then the paparazzi pleaded for dear life—well at least that was what it had looked like to me, I really couldn't tell but he was on his knees and clinging to Yue's legs and everything. Yue grabbed the man by his throat and said something before turning his attention to Syaoran. They seemed to be arguing with each other. Yue suddenly pulled Syaoran into a warm embrace and kissed him on the forehead in such a loving way that if I'd been a yaoi fangirl, I would've died on the spot from hotness overdose. Yue then led Syaoran away from the scene, the blazer still over his head and Yue's arms wrapped around his shoulders protectively while passersby started snapping photos with whatever mobile devices they had with them.

I had no idea whether to call Yue a knight in shining armor or compare him to the Hulk.

I got out of the car when they came closer, knowing full well what I had to do. I held the passenger door open for Yue to guide Syaoran in.

"I'll call you a cab," Yue offered.

Syaoran added, "We'll wait with you."

"Don't worry about it," I assured them. "I can catch a taxi on my own, you two better get out of here before the crowd starts piling up."

Syaoran gave a little nod and closed the car door. Was he trying to give Yue and me a little privacy?

"You better go," I said to Yue. "You're causing even more of a scene by lingering."

He brushed a strand of hair from my face before bending down and whispering into my ear, "You know… I never said I couldn't love you."

"I just know that you can't." I smiled at him and then looked at Syaoran briefly. "You should go."

"I'll call you," he promised right before leaving.

He didn't call.

I had known he wouldn't.

And I was grateful that he hadn't, because if he had called, I was afraid that whatever strengths I'd discovered within myself that night would vanish into thin air at the sound of his voice. I didn't want to succumb to that weakness anymore—the weakness of relying on a man to bring me happiness.

O—o—x—o—O

O—o—x—o—O

They didn't show up for Monday's session.

I was expecting to see a headline with their picture on the cover of a tabloid magazine or something, considering the event from the previous night, but nothing. Maybe the paparazzi tried to sue Yue for punching him? Maybe they were hiding from even more paparazzi? But it was weird… why was the paparazzi tailing Syaoran? Was their relationship a secret?

"Should I go to the hotel? But what good is that? Not like I'd be able to do anything." Honest to God, I really needed to stop watching Asian drama with my mother because I'd started develop a habit of talking to myself. "Now… what is Touya's stupid password?"

I was in Touya's office, trying to hack into his computer. I'd tried like a thousand passwords—none of which worked, obviously. Not to mention that he had set such a stupid secret hint too. How was '_forget me not_' supposed to help me come up with the password? Pssh, stupid brother…

"Sakura-chan," Miko poked her head through the door. "Your lunch is here. Do you need any help with your research? Maybe I can help. Your brother has a lot of books but he never organizes them, so they're all over the place and out of order."

I told the secretary that I had to research something in one of Touya's books in order to explain why I had to go into his office because I knew the girl reported everything to my brother.

"It's fine," I said. "I'll manage. Do you know his login?"

Miko shook her head.

"Yeah… I didn't think so. Well, thanks, Miko. Go enjoy your lunch."

_I give up_, I sighed in defeat. I was indeed doomed. Well, there was a Plan B, but it was really risky. Plan B involved calling my _pregnant_ sister-in-law while she was on vacation and asking her for Touya's password. The possibility that even she didn't know the password and the fact that Nakuru had the worst case of mood swings didn't make Plan B a very smart alternative—_Yeah, I think I'd rather deal with Touya's punishment_.

My cellphone rang and I answered after looking at the caller ID. "Yes?"

"A night is long enough right? Or do I actually have to wait three days before calling?"

I laughed. "Only if you are dating. Are you guys okay?"

"There are matters I have to tend to so I'm out of the country for a while—two weeks at least," he continued. "And I've already let your brother know of my situation so you don't have to worry about the missed sessions."

"What if I call you? Or you can call me when you have free time." Knowing the man, I quickly added, "For a consultation, not other things…"

"What other things?"

"Oh, you know…" I leaned back in my seat and propped the phone against my shoulder. "Things like the weather. But you said you are out of the country, then what about Syaoran?"

"He's still in Tomoeda."

I frowned. "You didn't just _leave_ him, did you?"

"You make it sound like I'm never coming back."

"Just make sure that you do." I was tempted to add '_for me_' at the end just to mess with him, but remembering what my parents always said about pulling the cat's whiskers, I decided it was probably wise not to start something I couldn't finish. "And you sound really exhausted. Don't overwork yourself—you're only human."

There was a long pause. I could hear him breathing on the other end of the line. An odd feeling churned in the pit of my stomach. When the man wasn't making my life hell, it almost felt as if he and I had this strange bond with each other… like we could understand each other without even having to say anything. I knew what he was thinking about at that moment because I, too, had the same thoughts the moment that I heard his voice, and I waited patiently for the words to come out.

"I won't be calling you again."

I murmured quietly into the phone, "I never expected you to call."

He chuckled on the other line. "It is better if I go back to hating you after all."

"Did you actually _hate_ me?" I asked. "I mean, I got the feeling that you didn't _like_ me, but why would you hate me? I'm freaking lovable!"

I could picture him smirking and snorting at the same time.

"That's a tale for another day," was all he said before hanging up.

"Pssh, irritating man," I stuck my tongue out at the phone. "To think I was worried about you for a minute."

_Seriously… stop watching drama_.

But I had to wonder, _if Yuichi and I had been able to draw such a clear line in our relationship, how different would things be today_?

O—o—x—o—O

O—o—x—o—O

And somewhere in Heaven or hell—or, well, _whatever_—someone decided it was time to dish out another disaster in the life of Kinomoto Sakura.

I rolled over and looked at the time. It was only 4:27 A.M. I was used to the occasional late night calls from some of my patients—mostly the women—but who in their right mind would call at such an ungodly hour? Couldn't they have waited for a few more hours after the sun had rose? Jeez!

I finally picked up the phone and growled rather too viciously, "You had better called at this ungodly hour to ask me for help getting rid of a dead body or else."

"This is Officer Konno Hiroshi calling from the Tomoeda Police Department. Am I speaking with Kinomoto Sakura?"

I buried my face into the pillow and let out a very unhappy groan. _Shit!_

"Miss Kinomoto?"

"I don't know anything about a dead body!" I quickly screamed into the phone and started rambling. "I was just sleeping, and then you called, and then I was pissed, and then it just came out—I swear I'm not an accomplice!"

"…I don't know what you're talking about," he said. "I'm sorry for calling you at this hour but we have Yanagisawa Naoko, Wu Shun, and Li Syaoran in custody."

All of a sudden, I was wide awake.

"You're shitting with me."

"They were arrested for public indecency, using an illegal substance, inciting a riot, resisting arrest, assaulting and sexually harassing a police officer."

I nearly choked on my own spit.

"Did you just say '_sexually harassing a police officer_'?" I didn't know who to pin that crime on—all three of them were crazy enough to do such a thing, which was the scary part.

"Their court date has already been set, so they are free to go; however, we need someone to come down to the station to post bail. Yanagisawa Naoko said to contact you."

I rubbed my temple, hoping to stop the headache from kicking in. "Can you tell me how drunk and stupid as shit they were?"

"Ma'am…" he started then paused momentarily before continuing, "When we arrived on the scene, they were doing a rain dance in a parking lot… _naked_."

* * *

«—**to be continued**—»

**A/N:** Aww, Yue "won't be calling [Sakura] again"—if you know what I mean ^_^ I really do think he's my favorite character. From now on, I'll do my author's notes at the end unless I have to address something really important that you need to know before reading a chapter (like, say, smut? Soon, I promise… **-coughs-**_like next chapter kind of soon_**-coughs-**).

And it is so good to see some of you again, along with some new faces as well! Take care till next update, hugs and kisses~!

Remember, starting next chapter, the rating will be **M**.

Oh, and a happy, happy birthday to **becomeafan**! Hope you have an amazing one, dearie~! **X3**


	8. sinking ship

I lied—smut next chapter. -_runs away_-

* * *

「L ◦ O ◦ V ◦ E」  
_and_  
«—OTHER DISASTERS—»

.◦.  
_Beta-reader_: Sakura-chan Master of the Clow

Chapter 8: sinking ship

O—o—x—o—O

O—o—x—o—O

O—o—x—o—O

O—o—x—o—O

"So, let me get this straight…"

Three idiots stared back at me, mouth agape and eyes wide as saucers, like they'd been caught going through the cookie jar after being told not to.

"Syaoran, you were having a headache so you went to ask Naoko if she had any medicine but you couldn't find her, so you went to Shun instead. And Shun,"—I looked at said man, who perked up like a puppy at the mention of his name—"you took him to Naoko's office to get the medicine, but when you were going through her purse, you two found what you _thought_ were her birth control pills and for some _stupid_ reason I can't seem to understand, you double dog dared each other to take one. And finally—"

I turned to Naoko who lowered her head, embarrassed.

"—explain to me why you had to take a pill as well. Did it not occur to you that perhaps it wasn't such a good idea to _have fun_ with your two employees who were already high as kites?"

"I tried to explain to them that it wasn't birth control pills and they had to get checked out at the hospital, but they weren't listening so…" she murmured quietly.

"Uh-huh," I said. "Keep going."

"If you can't beat them, join them?"

I honestly did not know how to respond to that.

"Why were you even in possession of ecstasy?" I quickly added as an afterthought, "Actually, forget I even asked. I don't think I want to know the answer. So how did you go from being happy as a clam to naked as the day you were born?"

Naoko and Shun wasted no time pointing their fingers at Syaoran.

"You don't understand how hot it was," he whined. "I ran out of the club for fresh air, but it was _still_ hot."

"So you took off your clothes and proceeded to do a rain dance in the parking lot. Why did you join him instead of stopping him?" I reprimanded the other two.

Shun pouted. "It looked really fun!"

"And we were high…" Naoko added in defense.

"Can I kill them?" I said to the officer standing next to me.

He chuckled. "I'm afraid I can't let you do that without having to lock you up as well."

"Sakura-chan, please hurry up and get us out," begged Shun.

I rolled my eyes. "You can leave as soon as you three apologize to everyone here for the trouble you've caused, _especially_ Officer Konno and Officer Aizawa."

Officer Aizawa smiled and opened the cell. "That isn't necessary. And I doubt Konno-san would want to see them."

"Should I get them checked out at a hospital or anything?" I asked.

"We had a medic look at them," he replied. "They are fine. They are coming down though, so you might want to keep an eye on them if it was their first time."

"Please accept my sincerest apology," Naoko said to the man before giving him her business card. "I'm single and ready to mingle."

I was mortified. "Naoko!"

I took them home before I could die of embarrassment. And by 'home', I meant my apartment because the last thing I wanted was to have them catch the Tuesday blues.

It was almost seven in the morning when we got back to my place. Naoko and Shun called dibs on the guest bedroom and Syaoran crashed on my bed. I took the opportunity to call the office and explained the situation to Miko, who offered her condolences and asked if she should call Nakuru—after all, there had not been a case my sister-in-law couldn't win. Calling Kinomoto Nakuru one of the best lawyers in the city of Tomoeda would be an understatement; she was, perhaps, _the_ best lawyer in the entire country. Okay, so I might be exaggerating just a little—but Nakuru was the best lawyer I knew, that much was true. And Lord knows the three needed the best lawyer to get them out of this mess.

I told her it was fine since their court date wasn't for another two months, it was probably better for everyone's safety if no one interrupted Nakuru while she was on vacation. After speaking with Miko, I sent a mass text to the other girls to meet at my apartment for lunch. I went to check on the other three to see if they wanted something to eat or drink. Naoko and Shun were out like a light. Before leaving them alone, I made sure to snap a picture of them spooning on the bed.

I snickered and texted the picture to the other girls.

Syaoran was wide awake when I went into my room to see how he was doing.

"I thought you went to sleep," I said.

"Couldn't fall asleep," he answered.

I walked over to the "night-table" and pulled open the drawer.

"What the— It's a mini-fridge!" he exclaimed.

I laughed.

"That was my reaction exactly when I bought it. Here," I handed him a bottle of water. "Stay hydrated."

"How are the other two?"

"They're sleeping like babies. Want to see something good?" I took out my phone and showed him the picture of Naoko and Shun spooning. We had a good laugh from it. He then pointed out to me that Naoko was going to kill me. I smiled wickedly. "Ah, but she isn't going to find out about the picture. I sent it to the other girls with the memo 'For her wedding day'."

"So, are Nao-chan and Shun like an item?"

"Nao-chan?" I gave him a teasing look. "Well, aren't you guys overly familiar with each other now?"

"She's not so bad. A little perverted though…"

"I do not want to hear that coming from _you_ of all people!"

He shrugged his shoulders like he didn't know what I was talking about. "I certainly do not touch my employees inappropriately. So what's the story with those two?"

"It's kind of complicated."

"Try me." He gave me a challenging look and patted the empty space next to him on the bed.

I climbed onto the bed and swatted his side. "At least give me a pillow. You don't need both pillows."

"Sorry but I do need both pillows," he said. "I have to sleep with eight pillows arranged into a hill formation to support my head, and since you only have two pillows, I'm suffering already—not to mention that your pillows aren't 360 thread count and 100% Egyptian cotton."

"Oh, just go to hell!" I yanked a pillow from under his head.

"My pillow!"

He gave me a little shove and grabbed the pillow back. I watched in disbelief as he rearranged the pillows to his satisfaction and lay back down with the biggest smile on his face. I really, _really _wanted to push his spoilt self off the bed. Actually, I did. He landed on the hardwood floor with loud thump. I messed up the pillows so that he would have to rearrange them again.

He picked himself up from the floor with a groan. He rolled his eyes, not at all appreciating what I'd done.

"Very mature."

I chose not to respond and, instead, slid off the bed.

He stopped fluffing and rearranging the pillows to ask, "Where are you going?"

"Out," I replied. "I want to watch TV, and you have to rest."

"There's a TV in here," he pointed out. "Stay a while? I can't sleep."

I grabbed the remote from the "night-table" and hopped back on the bed.

"I can't believe you're not tired at all after the night you've had," I said, sitting up with my back against the headboard. I turned on the TV and flipped through the channels for something to watch, but nothing caught my eye so I settled on a re-run of a drama.

Syaoran uttered a disgusted sound. "I already feel shitty enough. Please save me the torture of watching this garbage."

"If you're tired then rest," I stated matter-of-factly before turning up the volume just to spite him.

"I already told you," he said. "I _can't_. A thousand thoughts swarm my mind every time I close my eyes, but the longer I stay awake, the shittier I feel. I wish I could just fall asleep but I _can't_."

"Congratulations on your first Tuesday blues," I chuckled. "Was it your first time getting high?"

He gave me a weird look. "You sound like you've been high before."

"I was a bad—no, a _very_ bad girl in college," I said with a wink.

He laughed. "I should've known. Let me guess, you were one of those sheltered girls from an overprotective family who went wild after the first taste of freedom. Typical."

"Not even close."

He rolled over to look at me with curiosity. "You're not going to tell me, are you?"

"Unless you have something of equal value to share, then no, I'm afraid not."

"Tch. Spoil-sport," he muttered under his breath.

"So what sorts of thoughts are keeping you awake?" I decided to ask, hoping he wouldn't catch on to my intention.

But, of course, he was too smart to fall for my little ploy. "Am I to assume this is our out-of-office session? If the answer is yes, when you take in the fact that we're both lying on your bed, don't you think one might take this the wrong way?"

"I did say wherever and whenever in the contract."

"So was that a yes?"

"No," I said. "I really am just doing it from the good of my heart."

"You're too kind," he drawled, sardonically.

I let out a fake sigh. "Yeah, I've been told many times that I'm just too gosh darn nice. What can I say? It's both my virtue and vice."

"Oh, yes. You're a Saint."

"Takes one to know one, doesn't it?" I flashed him a very sweet smile. I then changed the subject, "So why were you being followed by the paparazzi?"

"You're talking about the man from the other day? He isn't exactly _paparazzi_… But he is one of the many journalists from China who have been tailing after Yue and me for months now."

"So are you like important or something in China?"

He looked at me like I was stupid. Instead of answering me, he asked, "Were you disappointed that it didn't work out with Yue?"

His question irritated me. Not because there was a hint of mockery in his voice, but because his tone told me that he hadn't cared. He hadn't cared at all that Yue had gone to dinner with me, and it wasn't the _I-don't-care-because-I-trust-my-lover_ kind of 'not caring'. It was the ever so familiar feeling of _I-don't-want-to-care-because-I-don't-want-to-face-reality_.

"Why would you ask me something like that? Weren't you at all bothered by the fact that he had gone out with someone else?"

"I'm not a child—something like that can't bother me anymore."

"So you just let him do whatever the hell he pleases?" I hadn't meant to raise my voice or snap at him. "That isn't right! He should be devoted to you only, regardless of whatever situation you're in. You continuing to act like you don't care will only enable him, making you just as much at fault for your crumbling relationship as he is."

He suddenly grabbed the remote from my hand and turned off the TV.

"Go watch your TV outside," he said, turning his back to me. "I'm tired."

"No, not this time… I won't let you off that easily this time. He talks in riddles and you don't want to talk at all— Frankly, I'm sick of dealing with you two! Did I ask to have you two thrown into my life? NO!" By now I was already too riled up to care that I was not using an indoor voice. "You're both nothing but cowards!"

He faced me and said, "Just leave me the fuck alone. You don't know what you're talking about."

"Oh, yeah? Then explain it to me! If you're not a coward, then what are you, Li Syaoran?"

"BAGGAGE! I'M HIS EXTRA BAGGAGE! ARE FUCKING HAPPY NOW?" His voice cracked just a little but he quickly regained his composure. "He'd left me once… but he came back when my parents passed away. He didn't come back because he _loved_ me. He felt obligated to come back for me, because he knew I had nobody else."

"…And do you stay with him for the reason that you have nobody else?" When he showed no intention of answering, I continued very quietly, "But you're wrong… You might think that he is the only person you have in this world, but I bet there are other people willing to pick you up when you're down. I know Meiling would. Also, I don't know as to why he came back to you, but I know what my eyes can see. And I can see that he cares a lot for you. So don't lower your self-worth by convincing yourself that he'd come to you out of pity. And you should not let yourself be defined by a man."

He jeered. "You are good at your job, aren't you?"

I hugged my knees to my chest. "I've felt that way once—whatever you're feeling now. I thought he was the most important person in my life, that I couldn't live without him. He was my addiction… and I'm not speaking metaphorically. He was, _literally_, my addiction. You wanted to know what happened to me in college. Well, here's my answer: _he_ happened."

"Who?"

"My first boyfriend… and only love so far," I said. "I was a freshman in college—young, naïve, and very foolish. He was a fallen angel from Heaven—handsome, suave, and _bad_ to the core. Girls called him the dark prince, one kiss and you will be ruined. I was ruined the moment our eyes met. I remember being on cloud nine when he asked me to be his girlfriend. The ten months we dated had felt like a dream, probably because it was indeed too good to be true. I caught him in bed with, not just one, but _four_ other girls."

"Four?" he snorted. "I've beaten that number once or twice. Stop making him sound like he's the most wanted man on the planet."

I scowled at such a confession. "Men are pigs. And I should remind you that back then, I did not know a man like Yue even existed."

He grimaced slightly. "Are you trying to say Yue is the most wanted man on the planet?"

"Can you argue otherwise?"

"What did you do after catching him cheating on you?" And of course he would change the subject.

I was beginning to be able to read the man like an open book. He wasn't at all as complicated as I'd thought. I smiled to myself at such a marvelous discovery.

"We broke up. I told myself I was done with him."

"But you weren't."

"At first I was, but then I started to think back on our relationship. I wanted closure. So I asked him why he hadn't tried to have sex with me again after the first time we did it. He said I was the one _good_ thing in his life that he hadn't already destroyed, and asked me not to take that single trace of humanity away from him. We agreed to be friends, but then the more that I discovered about the demons he carried around inside of him, the more my heart broke and I just wanted to make everything right for him… so desperately." I took a minute to keep myself together. "He started to push me away. By the second half of sophomore year, he'd become an entirely different person—I didn't even recognize him. My mother had always said that I have a habit of bringing home injured animals. I couldn't bring him into my world, and so I entered his. Parties, alcohol, drugs—I became a crack addict. For a year, my family and friends didn't know about my addiction, as I doubled my efforts to keep up with school so they wouldn't be suspicious, I guess that also added to my bottled up stress. My friends and family only knew that he and I were friends with benefits."

"How did they find out about your addiction?"

"I was careless and overdosed… I've made a lot of stupid mistakes in my life, and I have a lot of regrets—but the one thing I can never forgive myself for is putting my love ones through such a terrifying situation, not just once… but _fucking_ twice."

"Was the other time an accident?" he asked slowly.

I felt ashamed answering him. "…No."

"You can cry, ya know…"

I forced out a chuckle. "Yeah, I know. I just once promised myself that I won't cry for him anymore."

Syaoran sat up and wrapped an arm around my shoulders. I rested my head on his shoulder. It was comforting to have a shoulder to lean on while letting out what I'd never been able to tell anyone—not even my family or friends.

"They didn't understand," I found myself saying out loud. "They all thought I was with him because of the drugs. My family put me through rehab, and I was clean for a while. My life was back in order, and for a minute it seemed like nothing had ever gone wrong to begin with. Well, on the outside anyways. I felt dead on the inside. I went through many relationships but nothing… At that point I was practically living off of antidepressants, and when it got to a point where the medications just didn't do anything for me, I turned to crack again. But even it didn't do anything for me, I hit rock bottom. Then he came back into my life and saved me from my own misery—with heroin. I began to distance myself from my friends and family. It was just me and my needle, against the world."

"What about him?"

"He came and went. He didn't commit to anyone, but I was the one girl he would keep coming back to. Perhaps it was the drugs doing all the thinking but I deluded myself into believing that I was special. He would go away for a short period of time—anywhere from a day to a week—seeking company in the arms of other girls. And every morning that I woke up to an empty bed, a bottle of heroin and a note that said '_When you need me, I'll be there_' waited for me on the night-table. He always left me just enough to go through a day, however."

"That son of a bitch!" Syaoran shouted angrily.

"His mother actually was a bitch. And didn't I tell you that he was, _literally_, my addiction?" I continued, "He always waited for me to go through a withdrawal before coming back, and he would make me beg for more—_for him_. Our sick relationship lasted for quite a while, and then… when my brother called to tell me that our mother tried to kill herself with sleeping pills because she blamed herself for my misery, I broke down. I remember asking him if he'd even loved me right before leaving him. It was the first time I'd ever walked away from him. I begged my family for their forgiveness and I promised myself that I would not touch drugs, ever again. I went into rehab for the second time, and…"

"And?"

"And he was there."

"And, let me guess, you fell back in love with him."

"What can I say? I was young and so in love with _love_. We were still only friends with benefits though, but he didn't sleep with anyone else—that I knew of, at least. My family and friends didn't approve of my relationship with him, but as long as I was clean and being my normal self, they tolerated his existence."

"I can't imagine your brother letting him off so easily."

"Well, Touya had to stop trying to kill my 'friend' after a restriction order was put on him by a judge after he tried—well, not tried… he actually _did_ run Yuichi over. Touya claimed he was reversing and didn't see the other man standing behind the car. And before that, we were having a barbeque and Touya _accidentally_ spilled a gallon of propane on Yuichi, not to mention that my brother was holding a lit match in one hand. Mother put him on time out."

"Were you happy?"

I smiled. "I was…"

"What happened?"

"Out of nowhere, he told me he was leaving indefinitely," I said.

"Did he ask you to wait?"

"No. By telling me the night before, he was letting me know that was the end of whatever we had. And yet, I'd gone to the airport to see him after waking up at the break of dawn to an empty bed in his apartment. I didn't know which flight he was on, so I waited at the entrance of the airport for many hours. When I saw him, he had a breathtakingly gorgeous woman in each arm. He never looked at me once. He didn't even turn around when I screamed his name out in vain." My voice started to shake and tears slowly streamed down my face. "I didn't know what had gone wrong… We'd spent every waking second of every minute with each other, and he'd told me so many times that he loved me—we were _happy_. When I got back to my apartment, there was a bottle of heroin sitting on the coffee table. There wasn't a note—just the bottle and a needle. I asked myself so many times how could he have been so cruel. I locked myself in my room for a whole week, no food, no water, and no sleep. For an entire week, I lay in bed with the bottle in one hand and the needle in the other, and just stared at the ceiling—this very ceiling."

Syaoran didn't say anything. He just gave my shoulder a squeeze.

"Tell me you didn't…" he whispered.

"I'm sorry… I'm so sorry." And for the first time in one year, I cried—like _really_ cried. I poured out my heart and soul. "When I woke up in the hospital, my very first thought was, why… Why didn't God let me die? I couldn't look at my parents, my brother, or my friends. I was too ashamed. And I'm still too ashamed to tell them the story of my life. I don't know where I'd gone wrong, I just know that it was already too late when I found out I was walking down a destructive path. I could only look at his back and follow him to the end of the world."

He asked, "Why did you tell me your story?"

"My family and friends blame Yuichi for everything, but the truth is, I was responsible for my own demise. I allowed myself to be hurt while knowing that I could only get hurt. You are letting yourself be defined by one man," I said. "Just like me, you can only see his back. Stop following him, Syaoran."

"You and I are kind of pathetic, aren't we?"

I smiled and said, "Just a little. So what's your story?"

He chuckled. "Maybe another day—I'm too tired."

"Physically or emotionally speaking?"

"Yue never misses a meal," he said out of nowhere.

"What?"

"At our last session, you asked for our fondest memory of each other."

I pulled away from his shoulder and gave him a weird look. "And your fondest memory is that he never misses a meal? I mean it's good that he's eating three meals a day but… yeah, I don't see it."

"No matter how busy his schedule is, he will put everything on hold to have a meal with me—and might I add that he would just walk up to me, even if I'm in the middle of something important, and demand that we eat. Don't ask me why, till this day I have not gotten an answer out of him. And even if he leaves me by myself at night, he always makes sure to come home for breakfast."

"What about when he's away on business trips?"

"He texts me the word 'Eat' whenever he's eating and expects me to actually _eat_."

I decided that Yue had a very unusual way of showing he cared… or he was just strangely obsessed with eating.

"He doesn't like sweets, but he will eat my birthday cake. The man thinks that by being around me all the time when I'm sick, he will catch whatever I have and I'll magically get better, but unfortunately, it's been proven that he has an immune system of steel."

For someone who acted like he was the smartest man on the planet, Yue surprisingly… lacked common sense.

But then again—love makes everyone stupid.

I let Syaoran dish out all the various things about Yue that he found irritating or endearing 'til I grew tired and fell asleep on his shoulder.

O—o—x—o—O

O—o—x—o—O

Tomoyo was the one to point it out.

The other girls came to my place for lunch like planned, and I introduced Syaoran to them. Chiharu ogled him like a piece of meat in a butcher shop window, until she remembered that he had a male lover that is, and the saddest, most pathetic expression could be found on her face. Rika patted the girl's back sympathetically and said, "You have a husband—it wouldn't have worked out anyway."

I went into the kitchen to prepare drinks for everyone when Tomoyo followed me. "What's up?" I asked, thinking something was wrong.

"Doesn't Syaoran remind you of _him_?"

"Him who?"

Tomoyo rolled her eyes. "Sakura, don't make me say his name."

"Ohh, _him_!" I looked into the living room through the bar window. "I mean, they both have brown hair and brown eyes, and they're both really good looking and tall, but I would say the similarity ends there."

"Syaoran!" Tomoyo yelled through the window. "Can you give me a smile?"

Said man looked confused. I didn't blame him. He smiled nevertheless.

Tomoyo turned to me and said, "Don't you tell me you didn't see it."

I didn't dare to answer her, because I _did_ see it.

"Remember what you said to me on the phone right after you met him?" she continued. "You said it was _love_ at first sight. I know not to take that seriously but it shows that you were attracted to him."

I sighed quietly. "What are you getting at, Tomoyo?"

She looked at me suspiciously. "You haven't forgotten Yuichi at all, have you?"

Tomoyo would never ever mention Yuichi's name unless she was either extremely angry or terribly sad. When I took longer than necessary to answer, Tomoyo stormed out of the kitchen and grabbed her purse from the living room. The sound of the front door slamming was the only indicator of her sudden departure. Rika, Chiharu and Naoko rushed in to check on me.

"Sakura, what happened?" asked Chiharu. "I've never seen Tomoyo look so angry."

"I've never actually seen the two of you fight," Naoko added. Rika slapped her arm. "Ow!"

"I'm sorry," I said and quickly ran after Tomoyo.

Luckily, she was stuck waiting for the elevator and hadn't gone far. She turned her head away, giving me the cold shoulder when she saw me approaching.

"I have nothing to say to you," she huffed.

"What do you want me to do, Tomoyo?" I asked, my voice weakening. Everyone else was gathering behind us. "Do you want me to fall on my knees and cry my heart out while telling you how much it still hurts to think about him? Even mentioning his name feels like millions of tiny needles are stabbing at my heart. Do you want me to admit that I'm _fucking_ terrified at the idea of him returning? I don't want to go down that path again… but I don't know if I'm strong enough. The memories of him scream at me all day long every day without pause at how hopelessly worthless I am and how I can't possibly live without him. You think I want to hold onto the memories of him because I want to? You think I want to remember all the shitty mistakes I've made? You think I want to bear the guilt of disappointing you, my family, and everyone else in my life? It's been only a year, Tomoyo—I can't throw away six years of pain and misery in just a year."

"Sakura, I've never expected you to do such a thing. You know I've been waiting patiently for you to finally come to me and tell me what happened to you. Till today I didn't even know why you started doing drugs or why you tried to kill yourself. I'm your best friend—but even more than that, I'm your _family_. And yet… him—" Tomoyo looked at Syaoran. "Who is he? _What_ is he? He's nobody!"

"Tomoyo—"

"I came by a few hours earlier," she said quietly. "We all kept the fact that Naoko does the occasional 'high' from you… so I was worried that her situation might've reminded you of your own experience. When I came, I overheard you two talking. You are too selfish, Sakura. I sat in the car for almost three hours thinking. You chose that _bastard_—you chose someone who would not love you over everybody else that did. Admit it, Sakura, you can't let him go because you don't want to. Deep down inside, you've been waiting for him to come back, haven't you? Wake up, Sakura! He never loved you, and he never will! Don't be so stupid! Must you push your mother to kill herself for a second time—will that make you happy?"

_SMACK_!

Tomoyo held a hand to her cheek.

"And must you push her to into a corner?" Syaoran snarled at her. "You are no different from him."

The other girls and I rushed over to check on Tomoyo, but she pushed us away and ran off.

Chiharu turned around to slap Syaoran in the face. "What is wrong with you? You should never ever hit a girl! Didn't your mother teach you some manners?"

"Chiharu!" I shrieked.

"Sakura, you can't possibly defend him after what he's done to Tomoyo. He doesn't look at all remorseful for his action!"

"Now isn't the time to discuss that," I said. "We have to go after Tomoyo."

Rika held onto my arm. "It's probably best if you don't see her for a while. Give her time to cool her head. Please understand she didn't mean to hurt you in any way, Sakura. More than any of us, Tomoyo has always blamed herself for not being able to do anything for you."

"I know…"

"She'll come to you when she's ready. Don't worry, okay? We'll go talk to her." Naoko then turned to Syaoran and said, "I'll deal with you tonight."

"That means she's going to kill you," Shun was kind enough to let Syaoran know. He gave me a comforting a hug and whispered into my ear, "You may think you're weak, but you're the strongest person I know, Sakura-chan."

When they all left, I turned to kick an unsuspecting Syaoran in his family jewels making him hunch over in pain.

"What the fuck is wrong with you!" he barely managed to choke out.

"That was for laying your hand on my best friend," I said, unsympathetically. "I know you did it for my sake, but I also know that Li Syaoran is a much better man than that—or at least I would like to believe that."

After a few more minutes of groaning and writhing from what I assumed to be excruciating pain, he bellowed, "FUCK!"

"Come on, let's go," I said, helping him stand up and walking us back into the apartment. I left him on the couch and went to grab a bag of frozen peas from the freezer. I threw the bag onto his lap. "This should help. And I'm sorry."

He shoved the bag down his pants and exhaled a sigh of relief.

"No, you're not," he stated.

"You're right. I'm not sorry for hitting you, but I am sorry for not being sorry."

"Should I ask how you're feeling?" He sent me a side glance.

I plopped down on the couch and lay my head on his shoulder. "It's been a horrible morning. I don't want to talk about it anymore."

"I have a sneaking suspicion that you're treating me like a gay best friend."

"I wouldn't mind being friends with you," I said, while turning on the TV. "And you're gay. Two out of three—I say that's good enough."

"Your logic is admirable." He leaned back on the couch, propping his feet on the coffee table and hissing slightly from moving his… well, you know.

We watched TV in silence for the rest of the day, never once moving from our spot, except to go into the kitchen or use the restroom. For reasons unknown, we went from sitting next to each other with my head on his shoulder to lying on opposite ends of the couch with our legs in a scissor position like it was the most normal thing in the world. Well, in our defense, we were in a spooning position first but that was just plain awkward.

He nudged me with his foot and said, "Make some popcorn."

"No, it's your turn! I refilled our drinks last."

"No, you refilled the drinks before I got the ice cream," he argued. "So it's your turn to get snacks."

"Can't I wait for the commercial?"

"No."

I groaned. "Fine!"

When I came back with the popcorn Syaoran was looking at his phone.

"Eat?" I couldn't help teasing him.

He had an irritated look on his face as he put his phone away. "I was just looking at the time on my phone."

"I was talking about this." I set the bowl of popcorn on the table and looked at him slyly. "What did you think I was referring to?"

He merely grunted.

"So…" I lay back down on the couch with a grin. "Waiting for a text, aren't we?"

He threw a handful of popcorn at me.

"No, so shut up."

O—o—x—o—O

O—o—x—o—O

Nearly a week passed before I saw Syaoran again. It was a Monday night and I ended up having to keep an eye on Amazon for Naoko while she got some _excitement_ into her life after such a long tiring week. When I arrived at the club, Syaoran was sitting at the bar with a middle-aged woman, who was practically _molesting_ his thigh. They were both laughing quite heartily.

I approached the other end of the bar and asked Shun, "What's going on?"

"His punishment from boss lady for hitting Tomoyo-chan," the other man explained while looking at his watch. He took a nearby dry erase board, wrote the number thirteen on it, and held the board in the air. A young looking brunette then walked up to Syaoran and the middle-aged woman that was talking to him suddenly left.

"Yeah… you're going to need to give me a little more than that," I said.

"He's speed dating."

I rolled my eyes. "A little more, Shun."

"On a normal night, all he has to do is dance on stage with the girl dancers so he is protected from the grabbing and groping, as we have a 'look only' rule. As punishment, Nao-chan is making him sit down with any woman who is willing to pay ¥4000 for a five-minutes-up-close-and-personal _date_. Of course I have to keep an eye on them to make sure the women don't rape him."

"¥4000 for a five minutes chat? Who's crazy enough to do that?"

"One hundred and seventeen… That's _one hundred and seventeen_ crazy people, to answer your rhetorical question," he said. "Considering how we're only open for five hours, fifty-seven people won't get a turn, so tomorrow night will be their last opportunity. I can already imagine the brawl fest that'll take place."

"So that explains why there are at least ten women setting camps outside the club," I mused.

"Already?"

"But how is this punishment?" I said. "He actually looks like he's enjoying all the attention… and groping… and ear licking— Oh my god, she just stuck her tongue into his ear! That is disgusting!"

Shun laughed and handed me a drink. "Oh, trust me, he is suffering. Since you're not doing anything… please be the babysitter? These other idiots are lost without me running the bar."

He slid the dry erase board towards me with a puppy face.

"Yeah, yeah." I grabbed the board and walked over to Syaoran. I sat down next to him and said to the brunette, "I'm sorry but your time is up."

She gave me a dirty look before leaving.

Syaoran visibly shuddered when she was gone.

"So what is allowed and not allowed?" I asked him.

"No kissing. My clothes have to stay on—all zipped up and buttoned. No groping my crotch. And no putting my hands on her or his body parts."

I gave him a questioning look. "_His_?"

"There are a few guys." He then added, "I actually prefer the men over the women."

Well, of course he did.

"I wonder why…" I mumbled under my breath. I was about to hold up the board to call for the next person when I noticed Eriol heading in my direction. Even in the dim light of the club, I could see Death in his eyes. My first thought was that he'd come to yell at me for making Tomoyo sad.

"Where is he, Sakura?" He didn't just sound angry—he was murderous. "Where is this Syaoran person?"

Before I could speak, Syaoran—completely missing the fury etched clearly on the other man's face—let out an exasperated groan and said to Eriol, "Look. If you want to talk to me, you'll have to take a number and wait like everyone else."

Eriol turned to the man sitting next to me. "So you're the bastard—"

"Wait!" I quickly hopped off my seat and jumped in front of Syaoran. I tried to reason with the black head. "There's no need for violence. Chiharu slapped him, and I kicked him really hard in the balls. Not to mention that Naoko is already punishing him in the worst way imaginable. What if he gives Tomoyo a really heartfelt apology?"

"Sakura, he fucking hit my wife—my _wife_!"

Well, when he put it like _that_…

I stepped aside and let Eriol pummel the daylight out of Syaoran.

O—o—x—o—O

O—o—x—o—O

Officer Konno was not happy to be back at Amazon.

Apparently, some—okay, almost _all_ of the women went hysterical and called the cops to '_save [their] dear Syaoran'_. The police department actually sent out ten squad cars of officers with tear gas on hand— "_Just in case_," Officer Aizawa had said with a smile.

Unfortunately for Eriol, there were at least a hundred women pointing fingers at him for starting the fight. But fortunately for Eriol, Officer Konno still hated Syaoran's guts from the previous incident so he let Eriol off with a warning and a pat on the back. The officer then turned to Syaoran and said, "The next time I see you—run. Run far and run _fast_."

I spoke shortly with Eriol before he left.

"Is Tomoyo still upset with me?" I asked.

"She was upset with herself rather than with you," he said to me. "She's too embarrassed to come to you at the moment. I wouldn't have known about her getting hit if Chiharu didn't tell Takashi, who called me during dinner. I told Tomoyo I forgot something at the office in order to leave the house without her knowing of my intention."

I pulled him into a tight hug. "I wish there were more men like you, Hiiragizawa Eriol."

"Sakura, my left rib cage…" he hissed in pain.

"Oh, I'm sorry! But should you go home like this? Maybe you should go to the hospital first."

"I'll be fine," he said. "I'll see you later."

And he limped his way out.

Shun came up behind me. "There goes a dead man…"

"Yeah," I agreed. "Tomoyo is going to kill him. Where's Syaoran?"

"In the lounge."

"How's he doing?"

Shun shrugged nonchalantly. "I'd say fighting with Eriol has put him in a much better mood. He's been moody the last few days, always checking his phone and cursing to himself."

"Oh, _reeeally_?" I smiled at the revelation.

Shun's eyes twinkled with curiosity and asked, "You know something?"

"Don't forget the idiots are lost without you running the bar." I patted his back and went to the back of the club where the employee lounge was located.

Syaoran was too busy staring at his phone to notice me entering the room.

I cleared my throat to get his attention.

"Whatcha doing?" I asked.

He put his phone into his pocket.

"Nothing," he said.

I looked at him skeptically. "Okay, if you say so."

I walked over to the fridge and pretended to look inside while I carefully retrieved my phone from my clutch and sent Syaoran a text message. I turned around to observe his reaction once I'd sent the message. Seeing how quickly he whisked the phone from his pocket as soon as the '_Ding_!' went off _almost_ made me feel bad for playing a trick on him.

"So it's nothing, huh?" I said teasingly.

He huffed and shoved the phone back into his pocket. "You must think you're _so_ funny."

I shrugged and turned to look inside the fridge again.

His phone once again '_ding__ed_'.

"Second time is just asking for it," he said, a hint of threat in his voice.

I looked over my shoulder. "What are you talking about? That wasn't me."

The scowl slowly disappeared from his face and his eyes softened a bit as he reached into his pocket for his cell phone. And then the most beautiful smile graced his face. His eyes lit up, and the small dimple that formed on his right cheek was enough to turn my legs into Jell-O.

"Want some yogurt?" I asked with a smile.

"Sure."

O—o—x—o—O

O—o—x—o—O

"Sakura?" Tomoyo was both surprised and irritated when she opened the door. "It's almost three in the morning. What are you doing here?"

"Sorry, it's so late. I had to watch Amazon for Naoko tonight and closing took a while. Is Eriol still alive?"

Tomoyo rolled her eyes exasperatedly. "Hardly breathing after I was done with him."

"If you're not terribly tired… I have our favorite ice cream, an eight-pack, and a box of tissues—" I held up the plastic bag in my hand. "—if you want to listen to my tale of woe, that is."

She giggled. "Only if you recite it in iambic pentameter or I shall fall asleep. Come in."

I told her everything, from beginning to end, every thought that had went through my mind. Tomoyo went through a roller coaster of emotions—she had been angry, then sad, then angry again, then happy, back to sad, angry all over again, confused at one point, and expressionless at another. But when I was done telling her my story, there was only love and understanding in her eyes. I didn't sense pity from her anymore, and I could finally let myself cry in front of her.

"I'm sorry you thought you had to be strong for us—" She, too, cried. "—and I'm so sorry you felt like you couldn't cry on my shoulder."

"I'm sorry for making you wait," I said.

The next morning, Eriol found us sleeping in each other's arms on the living room floor and woke us up.

I groaned and asked, "What time is it?"

"It's nine o'clock," he answered.

"Shit! I forgot to set an alarm!" I shot up and looked for my clutch. "I hope my phone isn't dead because I didn't charge it all night."

My phone indicated that I had a missed call. Miko was going to kill me, I just knew it.

I went to my call log to call the girl back and froze.

Miko hadn't called.

I stared at the screen in confusion.

Missed call—_Kazuki Yuichi_.

* * *

«—**to be continued**—»

* * *

**OMAKE**: _A day in the life of a police officer_… (Crack)

O—o—x—o—O

O—o—x—o—O

Konno Hiroshi, an officer of the law for nearly 10 years, is a thirty-year-old virgin. Okay, not really. But he hasn't been laid in so long he might as well be count as a 'virgin'. Konno doesn't ask for much in life; in fact, he has only ever prayed for one thing every day for the past ten years.

"Please don't let me die today," he prays daily before the family altar when leaving to go to work.

"Our ancestors will watch over you even if you don't ask them to," a voice says, exasperated. His mother stands nearby with a broom in one hand and a shovel in the other. Konno cringes. So much for his plan to skedaddle before his mother has the opportunity to give him yet another _do-you-want-me-to-die-without-grandchildren_ speech. "If you have been just as diligent asking them to help you find a wife, you'd be married by now. You know Aizawa-san down the street? Her son just gave her a _third_ grandson this past weekend!"

"_Gave_?" Konno raises an eyebrow. "What—he decided he didn't want them brats anymore and just threw them at her? But what I want to know is what he did with the wife. If you had explained marriage to me in terms like that, I would've gladly picked up any woman from a street corner to get you off my back."

His mother charges at him with the broom and shovel. Konno quickly runs out of the house.

"Hiroshi!" his mother yells after him. "I'm not letting you back into the house until you've decided to settle down!"

Konno scoffs under his breath and keeps running. When will his mother learn? Apparently, of the two of them, only he remembers the other seven or eight times she has kicked him out and taken him back in within a few hours.

o—x—o

"Your mother called me. Why don't you just tell her you don't want to settle down because you don't want to leave her alone?" says the elderly man sitting across from him. "Ever since your father passed away, my sister has turned you into the center of her universe. Once you marry, you'll have your own family to take care of. I mean, isn't that the real reason why you don't want to marry?"

"Chief, is that all—"

"How many times do I have to tell you? Although you're my subordinate, you are my only beloved nephew first and foremost. So don't be so formal—call me Oji-san! Ever since you started to work under me, you only ever call me Chief."

"Chief—"

"Oji-san!"

"...Oji-san…"

"No, no, no! Say it like this… OJI-SAAAN—you know, with the heart at the end."

"Chief," Konno deadpans, "the next time you call me into your office, please have something important to say. Or I'm filing a complaint against you for harassment."

"Your new partner is arriving today." The chief's expression turns serious all of a sudden. "Hiroshi, he is an extraordinarily talented police officer, that's why I'm pairing him with you. Now keep that in mind before you act like a dick towards him. You may go back to work."

Konno has no idea what his uncle is implying.

Okay, so he is known at the office as 'Conan' the barbarian because his overly large physique intimidates just about anyone. He wears a serious face half of the time and a frown the other half. He has a scar on his left cheek that nobody knows the origin of—the Chief scolds anybody who has tried to ask. It is rumored that Konno Hiroshi fought a group of yakuza single-handedly and won, but when one of the yakuza captured a girl as hostage, he jumped in to save the damsel in distress and in the struggle with the yakuza, Konno's handsome face was scarred. Another rumor says that Konno got the scar from back in the old days when he was the leader of a yakuza gang—a girl had betrayed him and he lost everything in one night, thus explaining his current aloofness, superficiality and indifference towards other people; it is believed that Konno sleeps with a knife under his pillow and a gun in each hand because he can't trust again. Konno can't bother to disclaim either rumor—they both make him sound pretty bad-ass actually.

The female officers choose to believe the first rumor and the male officers claim the second one is more realistic. Neither, of course, is close to the truth. No one knows the source of said rumors—no one but Konno, that is. After all, who else can it be other than the Chief with his sick sense of humor?

Konno doesn't actually mind telling the real story behind the scar—if someone would just _effing _ask. One day, he was walking with a pair of scissors in his hand and he tripped…

Okay, so maybe he shouldn't _ever_ tell the real story.

"Ah, you must be Konno-san! My name is Aizawa Kouichi—Kou for short."

_Oh, dear Lord_…

And the single one fact that everyone _does_ know about Konno Hiroshi?

He is a homophobe.

o—x—o

His eyes are impossibly round and large, not to mention too damn blue for his own good.

His lashes are long and thick…

His lips full and pouty like it is begging to be ravished, and his God damn hair—Konno reaches over to grab a chunk of the other man's hair in one hand. His suspicions are correct. It is smooth as silk and as bright as the sun.

"Konno-san, what are you doing?" the blond asks, trying to keep his eyes on the road but it's kind of hard when his new partner is pulling and tugging at his hair out of nowhere. Konno has not said a word to Kou since the introduction. When they received an assignment to get some crazy lady off the roof of someone's car, Konno just threw Kou the keys and walked off. Kou asks again when Konno doesn't reply. "Konno-san?"

Konno is staring at the blond with such analytical eyes that Kou is beginning to think perhaps the rumors about the other man are indeed true—you know, the rumors that Konno Hiroshi masterfully kills his partner and hides the bodies. Why else would all of his old partners resign by sending in letters and not come in person? After all, where there's no smoke there's no fire, and if the _Chief_ of the department feels the need to warn Kou himself, then there has to be a sound reason. So maybe Konno is trying to figure out the best way to kill Kou?

_My new partner is a fruitcake_, is what Konno's thinking actually.

The man looks feminine. He sounds feminine. He even has a delicate feminine smell to him.

"Why do you have blond hair and blue eyes?" Konno asks.

"Is that what you were thinking about?" Kou laughs. "My little sister goes to cosmetology school. She uses anyone within grabbing distance as guinea pigs, even our poor old mother. So don't be surprised if I show up to work one day with pink hair—it has happened before. And you don't want to know about the blue contacts."

"How long have you—" Konno stops midsentence to marvel at the sight before them as they near their destination. "WHAT THE FU—?"

There are hundreds of people crowding the parking lot of the nightclub Amazon. Konno turns on the siren but no one budges from their spot. They both get out of the car and try to fight through the crowd to get to source of the commotion—that is, the woman dancing on top of a car in the distance. When they get to the source… they both wish they hadn't.

The woman is naked, like as in head-to-toe naked. Even in the dark Konno can tell Kou is blushing like beetroot. What's even more shocking is that, a few feet away, there are two naked men dancing in circles. Well, it looks like they are dancing…_ish_. One might argue that they look like they are having a seizure more than dancing.

"What do we do?" Kou asks Konno.

"You handle the woman—but don't touch no matter what," Konno says. "I'll deal with those two."

Konno decides that it probably wouldn't be a good idea to let Kou go near the naked men, because—well, him being gay and all…

"Excuse me!" Konno tries to get the men's attention. He has to shout a few more times because the crowd is overwhelmingly loud. When nothing works, he finally bellows, "YOU FUCKERS, OVER THERE!"

Okay, _that_ everyone hears.

"What did you call me?" the taller of the two men walks towards Konno—well, not really _walk_… Hell, Konno doesn't even know if there is a word to describe it. It's like a mix of a penguin waddle, the infamous pimp walk, and a freaking _dougie_. "Why you be trippin', foo? Back da fuck up, G! What? You wanna fight? You wanna fight, huh? Let's fight! I'ma kick yo ass back to yo momma's -beep-, beeeetch!"

Oh, God… This is embarrassing.

The other man quickly rushes over to pull his friend back. "Syaoran, he's a popo!"

Konno snorts. At least one of them is sane.

"But, Shun, he be looking at me funny." The one called Syaoran starts to shove Konno. "I'm all up in your face. Whatcha gonna do huh? Punch me. Go ahead, punch me, mutherfu—"

"Syaoran, shut up!" the one called Shun—ahh! Too many names… Konno decides to refer to them as Idiot #1 (aka the "gansgta") and Idiot #2. So Idiot #2 covers Idiot #1's mouth and smiles apologetically to Konno. "I'm sorry, officer. My friend is a little drunk."

"He doesn't _look_ drunk to me," Konno observes. "Are you high?"

"What? High? Noooooooooo!" Idiot #2 replies.

Yups. They are high.

"I'm sorry but you'll have to find your clothes and come with us to the station. You, your friend here, and Idiot #3 over there," he says, gesturing to the woman a few feet away behind them.

"Officer," Idiot #2 lets go of Idiot #1 and is getting closer to Konno—_too_ close. "It's been a long night. We're just having fun, there's no harm done here. Can't you let this slide? I'll be real sweet to you…"

Konno steps back cautiously when said idiot puts his hand where it isn't welcomed.

"AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"

Konno turns around in time to see Idiot #3 jump off the car, landing right on top of Kou. She is clawing at him and yelling at the same time. "Rape! Rape! Rape! Rape!"

_Oh, shit_… is Konno's first thought. He hopes Kou hasn't done anything stupid.

"Nao-chan, did he try to rape you!" Idiot #2 shouts to Idiot #3.

"No, I'm trying to rape him!" Idiot #3 shouts back.

Konno feels sorry for Kou. It's only his first day of work… And if he wasn't gay before, there is no way he will be straight after tonight.

Gay or not, a partner is still a partner…

Konno prepares to lend Kou a hand. He takes about one step when someone suddenly jumps onto his back and tackles him to the ground. Konno finds himself wrestling with Idiot #1, who is surprisingly strong.

"Oh no! Syaoran, don't get hurt!"

"Be careful, Syaoran!"

"Syaoran!"

Women all around them start to cry and wail.

"SHUT THE FUCK UP!" Konno yells at the top of his lungs.

"You shut up, you big ape!"

"Yeah! Why are you picking on Syaoran?"

"Don't you dare hurt him!"

The women are all talking at once. His uncle was wrong—_this_ is the reason why he doesn't want to get marry.

Konno should be paying attention… Too bad the women are getting on his last nerve and he is focusing more on telling them to shut up, because Idiot #1 successfully pins him to the ground—arms, legs, body, everything. The women break into cheers.

"Syaoran is so amazing!"

"Beat him up!"

Konno wonders if anything will shut them up. Luckily, he doesn't have to wonder much longer… The whole parking lot goes dead silent. Konno would've thanked the Lord… but his brain has fried itself and his mouth is, unfortunately, occupied by Idiot #1's.

Of course, nothing lasts forever. The moment of quiet and peace is quickly replaced by horrific screams and cries of women everywhere.

"NOOOO!"

"You big ape!"

"Why are you defiling my Syaoran! Get off of him!"

They begin to shove and push each other while trying to get to the two—you know, to get Konno off of Idiot #1. Funny how a woman's perception works…

Idiot #2 comes to the rescue and pulls his friend away from Konno. "What were you thinking?"

"Well, my hands and legs were all occupied, so all I had to attack him with was my mouth," is the idiot's reasoning.

Konno takes the opportunity to throw a _very_ hard punch at said idiot's face when he is off guard.

"No, no, no!" Idiot #2 starts to shriek like a girl. "His money making face! If his face is damaged in any way, you better watch your back!"

Before Konno can respond to that, a swarm of females come charging at him with claws, purses, heels, and whatever weapons they have with them.

"Revenge! Revenge! REVENGE!" Idiot #3 is shouting from on top of a car. "Nobody touches our Prince! Let's kill the bastard!"

"Nao-chan, this is madness!" Idiot #2 cries out.

"No, this is Sparta!"

Five hours later (after it took reinforcement from nearly the _entire_ Tomoeda Police Department to control the crowd)…

Konno is lying in the coffee lounge, scratch marks all over his face, his uniform—if you can even call it that anymore—looks like it's been through a shredder… twice. Ten years of duty, never has he ever thought this job isn't worth it. Until now anyways…

Women are scary.

Konno knows that he would have to marry one day to make his mother happy. But once again… women are scary.

Kou walks into the room.

"How are you feeling?" He hands Konno a can of beer. "Chief says you deserve to have one."

"Thanks."

"Well, tonight certainly was some experience…" chuckles Kou.

"How do you become gay?" Konno suddenly asks. "Like… do I just decide I'd rather be gay and then I'm automatically gay?"

Kou blushes and sputters, "W-Why are y-you asking me? H-H-How w-would I know?"

"Well, then how did you do it?"

"Konno-san," Kou tries to say as calmly as possible. "I'm married…with four kids—three boys and a girl. Whatever made you think I was gay?"

The other man glances over Kou from head to toe. "Go look in a mirror."

"Konno-san, that is very insulting," Kou censures, but he isn't mad at all. Konno decides that the man is too good-natured for his own good. "My mother lives four houses down the road from you! I've been over to your house twice! But each time you would grunt and go into your room before we could even be introduced."

"Oh…" Okay, so Konno occasionally ignores people and forgets they're even there. Who doesn't have a bad habit? "Ah, so you're _that_ Aizawa, the one who gave the third… So, what did you do with your wife?"

"…Excuse me?"

"My mother keeps bringing you up every time she nags me to find a wife. All she ever talks about is how you're always giving your mother your kids, so how do you get rid of your wife?"

Kou is starting to think that all rumors about Konno Hiroshi are exactly just that—rumors. In fact, he sees exactly why every single one of Konno's old partners resigned within a week of working with him.

The man is stupid.

_So_ stupid, in fact, that it hurts to look at his face while knowing _none_ of the terrifying rumors that have made Kou respect the man are true.

Konno Hiroshi is a walking lie.

Kou starts to cry for no reason, and Konno has no idea why.

His old partners also cry for no reason every time they are alone with him.

Is he _that_ scary?

o—x—o

"Have you decided to get married?"

"No—" His mother shuts the door before he can finish.

Konno rings the doorbell again.

She opens the door and says, "I already told you, Hiroshi—marry or else."

"I've decided to become gay."

Konno catches his mother before her head can hit the floor.

**THE END.**

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**A/N:** Sorry if I've destroyed your image of Syaoran. But I hope you liked the omake! I added it to lighten up the mood of this chapter a little bit. Till the next update~! I can't promise that it'll be next week or any time soon, but I will try!


	9. cheese and wine

Due to FFN's recent purging of M stories and how one might interpret "_detailed descriptions of physical interaction of sexual or violent nature_", I'll be keeping the content on this site T-rated.

You can find the smut version on the website—www **dot** aesha **dot** me **dot** pn **slash** 9**dot** html

**Please Note**: Just for future reference, I'm not putting quotations around the word _smut_ this time around like I did with Plumber, so that should be a warning in itself (perhaps not with this chapter, but later on down the road C: hehe).

* * *

「L ◦ O ◦ V ◦ E」  
_and_  
«—OTHER DISASTERS—»

.◦.

.◦.

Chapter 9: cheese and wine

O—o—x—o—O

O—o—x—o—O

O—o—x—o—O

O—o—x—o—O

I was just staring at my phone.

Staring…

…staring…

…and staring.

I'd been staring at my phone all day long; it was all that I _could_ do. _Why did he call? Should I call him back? Will he call again? Should I answer if he does?_ The questions kept coming.

Of course, those thoughts were pretty fuzzy in my mind as of now, seeing as how I had chugged my way through a giant glass of margarita and was working on my third shot of tequila.

"Waiting for a phone call?"

I jumped out of my seat with a yelp and started to cough uncontrollably from almost choking on the tequila. _Oh god_—my throat burned. And not so wonderfully, too.

Syaoran then rested his chin on my shoulder. "Why are you here again tonight? Where's Nao-chan?"

"She called me down here and went off somewhere," I replied; tapping him to get off of me.

"Why does she always call you and not your other friends?"

"Cause the other girls aren't stupid enough to answer her calls," I said.

"Calling yourself stupid now?"

"Everyone else does it."

He grabbed the shot glass from my hand before I could pour myself another drink. "Well, you _are_ acting pretty stupid right now."

I regretted telling him about Yuichi's call. Hell, I didn't even know why I told him.

"Oh bugger off." I drank from the bottle instead. But, of course, he had to grab that away from me as well. "That's mine! Give it back!"

"No. This,"—he held the bottle of tequila above my head—"belongs to the club. _You_ need to go home."

I jumped for the bottle, to no avail. Curse his stupid height.

"How tall are you?" I asked; going completely off subject.

He rolled his eyes but answered anyway, "185 centimeters."

"And you're shorter than Yue?!" I looked at him incredulously. "He must be a giant!"

Syaoran seemed a bit peeved. "He's _only_ ten centimeters taller than me. According to scientific studies, I can still catch up to him."

My mouth formed into an 'O' shape. "Wow," I marveled. "Was Yue created in a lab or something? Jeez."

"Sakura—" Syaoran looked at me exasperatedly. "—_Go home_."

I lowered my eyes to the floor and admitted in shame, "I'm afraid to be alone with my thoughts tonight." I sat back down. "Rika is busy with the wedding, Chiharu is trying to conceive, Tomoyo just took in my life story last night, and Naoko is just… well, Naoko. So, _please_, don't judge me."

He ruffled his hair and let out a frustrated sigh, walking off and taking the bottle of tequila with him. He came back a few minutes later, the bottle no longer in his possession.

"Let's go," he said.

"Go where?"

He grabbed my wrist and tugged me to my feet. "Let's go before Shun realizes that I'm not doing my job."

Someone suddenly called out his name. Standing a few feet away was a woman _stylishly_ dressed in a red mini-dress that barely covered her rear end. Syaoran tugged on my arm again, a desperate cry for help apparent in his eyes. He pulled me along behind him to the back exit.

"Syaoran, you can't just skip work. Naoko will kill me!"

"Didn't you say that you were afraid to be alone tonight? Well, I'm volunteering to keep you company," he said. "You can thank me later."

I rolled my eyes at his arrogance. "Or maybe you should thank me."

He stopped to look at me. "Care to elaborate?"

"No, no." I faked an innocent smile. "But you didn't have to drag me to the back. My car is parked up front."

"You don't think I'm going to let you drink and drive, do you?"

"I'm fine," I insisted. "I'm not _that_ lightweight."

He gave me an irritated look that said we could stand there and argue all night long if that was what it would take to shut me up.

"Okay, fine," I said, exasperated. Yanking my wrist free, I pushed the exit door open and stomped into the parking lot. It didn't take me long to find his car, even in the moonlight; after all, only one car stood out from all the others. Diamond in the rough, indeed.

"I know what you're thinking," he said as he opened the passenger door and waved me inside.

I slipped into the sleek vehicle. "Oh? And what am I thinking?"

"You're thinking, '_Sweet ride_'. And a sweet ride you shall get." He flashed one of his cheeky grins and closed the door, leaving me befuddled and somewhat amused.

He walked around to the other side, and I waited for him to get into the driver's seat before asking, "Was that supposed to be dirty?"

He let out a low chuckle and turned to face me, his hand suddenly brushing my ear and then down the curve of my neck to my collarbone. His eyes lingered on my lips the entire time, making me shiver involuntarily. Lord. That look could make any woman burn with desire.

He chuckled again and gave me a knowing smile.

I couldn't hold back the laugh in my throat. "Oh, you are _good_." I told myself not to let my guard down too much around Syaoran. It was one thing to let him distract me from thinking about Yuichi but a whole different story to actually fall for his ploy.

"I'll take that as a compliment." He smirked and put the car into motion. "My place or yours?"

I leaned my head against the window and said, "Yours."

"Do you need to get a change of clothes for work tomorrow?" he asked.

"I'll go back really early in the morning."

He took his eyes off the road long enough to gaze at me with a questioning twinkle in his eye, but he left it at that and the rest of the ride was relatively quiet.

O—o—x—o—O

O—o—x—o—O

"You can take Yue's room," said Syaoran when we got back to his place.

I was not thrilled at the aspect of sleeping in Yue's bed…again. "If there's no other room available, I'll just take the couch."

"I would tell you to sleep in my cousin's room, but she's kind of anal about people entering her bedroom. Housekeepers aren't even allowed to go in there."

"Really? I didn't get that impression from Meiling at all."

"You've met my cousin?" He disappeared down the hallway and I looked around since I didn't get a chance to stop and admire how luxurious everything was the last time I was here, and gosh, was their penthouse suite luxurious. The place looked like it was ripped right out of a magazine with its elegant contemporary decor. But then I started to notice that they hadn't added any _personal_ touch to the place. Not a single photo of Syaoran or Yue was in sight. Everything looked _too_ picture perfect—it didn't feel at all homey. Syaoran came back into living room a few minutes later with a set of nightclothes in his hands. "You should be able to fit into Meiling's clothes."

"Thanks," I said, taking the clothes from him. "But, yeah, I met Meiling last week. Remember my friend Tomoyo? Her husband and your cousin are good friends. Where's the restroom?"

"Down the hall, first door on the right."

I left to change my clothes, and came back to find blankets and pillows already laid out on the couch.

Syaoran patted the spot on the floor next to him.

"What's all of this?" I walked over to join him. On the coffee table were two tall wine glasses, a bottle of red wine, and a cartoon of vanilla ice cream. He scooped some ice cream into a glass and filled it up with the wine. I mused, "This is new to me. So are we drinking to a broken heart, or are we eating our broken hearts?"

He handed me the glass. "Who said my heart was broken?"

"I don't know… Is it?" I sent him a side-glance as I took a big gulp of my drink.

He smiled knowingly. "Drop it, Sakura."

"So we can talk all about me but not a single thing about you? That's not fair."

"Only one of us is truly doing it from the goodness of his heart."

"Should I pay you then?"

"With money? I think you'll have to try harder than that." He waved a hand in the air as if telling me to take a good look at my surrounding.

I snorted at such a gesture. "You are so full of it."

He poured himself a glass of wine and said something about him being really impressed with my persistence. "Most shrinks would've given up by now. More wine?"

"Sure," I replied, holding my glass out to him as I continued, "And I imagine I'm quite different from the other therapists you've seen. Much cuter, I presume?"

He filled my glass and said with a slight smirk, "Well, what do you know? Arrogance _is_ contagious. I'm afraid you might've been spending a little too much time with me."

"Finally admitting that you are arrogant?"

"I never said I wasn't arrogant," he retorted. "You make it sound as though being arrogant is a bad trait, and I don't agree with that."

"So arrogance is the new humility," I quipped. "You and Yue suddenly make all the sense in the world now."

"Wisecrack," he snorted under his breath.

"You're sleeping out here?" I asked when he suddenly hopped onto the couch and started to climb under the blankets.

He paused to look at me momentarily. "You don't have to sound _that_ surprised. It's a huge blow to my character if you think I'm the kind of man to let a woman sleep on the couch while he sleeps comfortably in a bed."

"Whatever happened to eight pillows in a hill formation?"

"My couch is a lot more comfortable than your bed," he simply said. And might I add that he sounded pretty smug about it. "My room is the last door on the left by the way."

"You're sleeping already? I thought you were going to keep me company."

Rolling over on his side, he turned to me and grinned. "You don't want my company. Remember?"

His words threw me off for a second and it took a while before I finally got his meaning. Then my eyes dropped to the glass of wine in my hand, not sure how I should be handling the implications of his words. I could laugh it off but that would just be a lame attempt on my part and he would've seen right through me. I could press him harder but something told me that would only shy him away even more, prompting him to put up yet another barrier. I could accept his company—if he was so willing to offer—but I knew that I would be going to hell if I did.

He interrupted my trail of thoughts with a chuckle. "You're doing it again."

I looked at him curiously. "Doing what?"

"I don't know—whatever it is that you shrinks do." His hand suddenly reached out to wipe something from my upper lip. "Foam," he explained and continued, "So… What's on your mind?"

"I'm thinking that you've mastered the art of changing the subject. What? Are you surprised that I've actually caught on to you?"

"You're not as dumb as you look," he said.

"Was that supposed to be a compliment?" He grinned smugly and I had to mentally kick myself in the ass for playing right into his hands. "You're trying to go off topic again, aren't you?"

He feigned ignorance, looking to the side as if in deep thought for a while. "What were we talking about again?"

"Don't give me that crap!" I placed my drink on the coffee table and moved to the couch; sitting against him, my back to his chest, his back to the couch. "Come on, Syaoran. Tell me something about yourself. Anything—doesn't even have to be about Yue."

"Okay. Let's see…" He tucked both arms under his head as he shifted to his back "My birthday is July 13. I'm a Cancer. I enjoy long walks on the beach and—"

I slapped his arm. "Ha Ha. Very funny. Seriously though, you pique my interest."

"How so?"

"How so?" I pondered the question in my head. How _did_ he interest me? There were so many answers; most of which had to do with his looks more than anything else. "This is going to sound extremely cheesy—but you're like a puzzle piece."

"So you're trying to figure out where I fit in?"

"Something like that."

"And have you figured out where the puzzle piece goes?"

I frowned at him. "You're mocking me, aren't you?"

"No. I really want to know what conclusion you've drawn about me in the few weeks that we've known each other."

"You have an inferiority complex," I said. "Your temper and charming smiles are nothing more than a defense mechanism, a cover, if you will. And… you have a _very_ delicate situation."

His head suddenly snapped up. "What?"

"Oh, you know, how you're—" He didn't flinch as I inched my face closer to his, till our noses were almost touching. "—180 degrees shy of heaven," I finished.

He looked at me with a deadpanned expression and cupped my head in his hands, forcing me to meet his eyes.

"Are you drunk already?"

He probably thought I lost my marbles, but really I was only trying to make a point on what I'd said earlier about him having an inferiority complex. And, as far as I could see, he reacted as I'd expected.

I told him that I wasn't drunk.

"Good," he said, pushing me onto my back before I could put two and two together.

There was a hint of challenge in his voice, just enough to remind me that fire burns. Oddly enough, there was something so familiar in the way he looked at me. Perhaps it was his eyes, or his overly confident attitude. Perhaps it was the way locks of brown hair fell over his face as he leaned down towards me. Or perhaps it was my mind playing tricks on me. Well, whatever it was, it felt nice.

"Then you'll remember this tomorrow morning," were his last words. And his lips came crashing down on mine.

Okay. _That_ I did not expect.

I marveled at how soft his lips were.

His kiss was rough and demanding, yet gentle at the same time—it was as if Kami-sama had taken what I liked about Yuichi's kisses and combined it with Yue's to mold Syaoran's kisses into my idea of _the_ perfect kiss. And his kiss was just that: perfect. The way he bit and nipped at my bottom lip was both deliciously painful and unbearably pleasurable, and the gentle way in which his tongue teased its way to my lips made me want to melt into his arms. His tongue lightly grazed against mine, shredding what little inhibitions my conscience possessed, and all my senses went out the window. I felt him smiling—scratch that, _smirking_ into the kiss when I arched upward to deepen the kiss.

He placed one hand behind my neck and tilted my head slightly sideways, lowering his lips to the base of my throat. Shivers ran down my spine every time his mouth found all the right spots. His other hand drew circles up my inner thigh and finally rested at its destination, and I could feel him massaging me through the thick, denim fabric of my jeans and my breath hitched in the back of my throat. I tried to hold back a moan—only half successful—unsure why I tried to hold it back, why I even felt a need to feel embarrassed; as if I hadn't already stepped over the boundary.

His lips found mine again as he put more pressure into his caress.

_Shit_.

But just when I thought he was going to drive me over the edge, he suddenly drew away. No more touching. No more kissing. Only his face hovering over mine, his breath slightly uneven and his lips caught somewhere between a grimace and a grin.

"Now is the time to regain your senses," he said, his warm breath feathering over my lips, sending a wave of goosebumps along my skin. _His mouth is right there_, a tiny voice in my head said. _Reach for it and it's yours._ And as if he'd heard my thoughts, he added in a low whisper, "Or else I'm not going to stop."

Seriously, it was all those drinks I had…

… because a sober Sakura in her right mind would've known better—_that_ Sakura would not have kissed an already taken man, much less a gay one.

But I was drawn to him like moth to a flame, even if I knew that flame could very well be my demise.

You really can't teach an old dog new tricks.

I let my eyes close and allowed myself to enjoy the moment wanting now, more than ever, to feel something I hadn't felt in a very long time: _pleasure_.

"Give me a minute," he said, hopping off the couch and hurrying to—what I assumed to be—his bedroom. I could hear drawers opening and slamming, followed by Syaoran's uncensored curses. "I'm going to kill her!"

"_Her_?" I asked with curiosity.

He came back out a second later.

"Meiling—" he replied, not pleased with whatever the heck was going on, "—took all of my condoms."

"Did she need _all_ those condoms?"

"No. She kind of forced me into an agreeing that I won't sleep around until this inheritance thing is over. You wanted to know why I haven't had sex for a while—well, now you know."

"Doesn't Yue know?"

"Meiling wants me to pretend I'm behaving myself, at least until I turn twenty and take over the family business."

It felt like my heart stopped beating, and I couldn't breathe for a minute (not the good kind of breathlessness might I add). I played his words over in my head for like a hundred times—he most definitely did say what I thought he did. I tried remembering if I'd ever asked for his age. Nope. Since he and Yue were together, I'd assumed he was older than me, somewhere around Touya's age to be more exact.

_Oh…my…God._

I almost had sex with a guy who was nearly five years my junior.

"This cannot be happening," I mumbled.

Well, it was only a five years difference—it wasn't like I was robbing the cradle, so God would forgive me…right?

"W-Wait… if you're 19…and you said you and Yue have known each other for nineteen years…" I did the math in my head. "…_oh fuck_."

"What?"

"Okay…I don't know how to say this," I started very slowly. "But oh! I have the funniest story to tell you."

"Really now?" he said, wryly, "I just love a good laugh."

"So, like I have this friend, she's also a couples therapist. She's been having the impression that her new patients are a lesbian couple, which I can't really blame her, but as it turns out, they're not a couple and could possibly be sisters. Don't you think that's funny though?" I tried to laugh as naturally as possible.

"My parents weren't old enough to have Yue and then me twelve years later, if that's what you're going at." Well, he sounded very calm. That was a good indication. Right?

"Oh…" I quietly said. "…So… What's your relationship?"

He arched an eyebrow delicately at me. "Oh, _now_ you ask? But if you must know, he's my uncle. Shouldn't you already know this? No, wait, I remember you feeding our file to the shredder. No wonder some of your questions sounded really weird. I thought it was just your method of doing things."

He started to laugh, his head falling back and his shoulders shaking.

"…you find it funny too, right?" I asked carefully.

"No, I'm laughing at the thought of Yue throwing your dead body into the ocean," he said. "Whatever gave you the impression that he and I were together?"

"What else? I'm a couples therapist!" I said. "Touya told me to work on your _relationship_. All of my questions and your answers, and the signs—there were lots of signs!"

"That you obviously misinterpreted."

"Not to mention that you two openly admitted to being gay—well, bisexual, but whatever, potayto, potahto."

"Do you like men?" he suddenly asked.

"What?"

"Do you like men? It's a really simple question."

"Of course I like men," I answered, exasperated.

"I, too, like women. Does this mean we _like_ each other?"

"Okay, so I made a huge mistake, but I'm coming clean and admitting that I screwed up. Can we move past that?" I said. "If not for the sake of whatever the heck that was about to happen between us then at least for all the secrets I've never told anybody else but you. My heart was in the right place, and I really was trying my best to help you two—though not in the way that you'd expected."

"Sakura, save your speech," he said, rather stoic and unmoving. "I could care less if you mess up or succeed. Yue, Meiling, and your brother are the ones you'll have to beg for mercy from."

"That's why you should fill me in!"

"Oh, no, no, no, no, no. You are on your own. You're lucky I'm not telling Yue this very minute."

"B-But…I tried to hack into my brother's computer to print out a new file but it didn't work! There's nothing I can do now except come clean to him and accept the death penalty. Leave it to my brother to come up with something as stupid and vague as 'forget me not' for his password hint. I mean, gosh! You'd think he would make my name or birthday his password, considering how _obsessed_ he is with me."

Syaoran suddenly looked like he'd swallowed something bad. "Are you kidding me?"

"What?"

"Oh, this is fucking rich."

"What?" I asked again.

He ignored me and went over to the coffee table. Grabbing the wine bottle, he chugged a good bit down his throat and then said, "I can tell you what your brother's password is, but I'm not sure you'd want to know."

"You're playing with me," I said. "How would you know his password?"

"_Forget-me-not_ is a type of flower," he said. "It also happens to be Yue's favorite flower. Given their history, it doesn't take a rocket scientist to put two and two together."

"H-History? W-What history are you talking about? Weren't they just friends? Why would my brother make his password—oh... oh? _Ohhh_! EW! EW! EW! That's so disgusting!"

"You have something against it?"

"YES!" I didn't care that I was screeching at the top of my lungs. "Anyone can be gay except for my brother! He can't be gay—he's married! And he has a kid on the way! And you're talking about Touya and _Yue_—my brother can't bottom!"

"_That's_ what you're concerned about?"

"You're doing that thing where you trick me into talking about something else so you don't have to tell me what I really want to know, aren't you?" Oh gosh, how I wished that had been true. "Tell me this is a joke."

"What's the big deal? Is it so terrible to find out your brother used to date another man?"

"Yes! It's—it's unnatural!" Okay, that came out wrong. I meant to say the idea of Touya and Yue together was unnatural, not two men being together. "My brother's not supposed to have a whole other life his family doesn't know about. It is so hypocritical of him! What if they're still seeing each other? He's going to ruin everything—his marriage, his life, his reputation, his career!"

Syaoran scoffed. "I think you're thinking too much out of this. Your brother was the one to break it off. I doubt he'll suddenly have a change of heart and 'ruin everything' like you said."

"Touya broke it off? Why?"

He shrugged nonchalantly. "He stopped coming over altogether—I was fourteen at the time—and Yue didn't mention him after that. I don't think they saw each other again till Meiling contacted your brother. Don't tell him, but of all Yue's playthings, I hated him the least."

If what Syaoran was telling me was true…then my brother had been involved with Yue as a married man. He and Nakuru got married during my senior year of high school, but according to Syaoran, Touya and Yue didn't break it off till around five years ago. I didn't want to believe that my righteous brother, Mr. Always-doing-the-right-thing, did something like breaking his wedding vows.

"…Are you okay?" Syaoran sounded genuinely concerned. "Sorry. If I knew it was going to hit you so hard then I wouldn't have told you."

"What time is it?" I asked.

"Almost two. Why?"

"I-I should go home," I said as I scrambled off the couch. "Can you call me a cab?"

"You sure? It's late, and I thought you didn't want to be alone with your thoughts."

"Yeah, well, now Yuichi is the last thing on my mind—thank you, you've been a huge help." The words came out a little sharper than intended.

"Next time give me a heads up so I can get out of your projection zone," said Syaoran.

"Sorry," I apologized. "I didn't mean for it to sound like that. I just need to be alone and slowly process this new startling information. But thanks for having me over, I really appreciate you trying to help. I'll call you tomorrow or something because we still need to talk."

He rolled his eyes slightly. "Please don't start acting like them too."

"Like who?"

"Everyone else—just because I'm younger, you all treat me like a brat. Don't use that adult tone with me."

I smiled slightly.

"What?" he said; annoyed.

I didn't tell him that knowing his age now explained so many things about him and his actions as of late.

He walked me to the front when my cab was ready.

"What do you think your receptionist is thinking right now?" I whispered to him jokingly as we passed the front desk.

"I think you've become my Pretty Woman."

I snorted at his reference. "Oh, puh-lease! You're no Richard Gere."

"Let me know when you get back to your place," he said, opening the car door for me.

I stepped into the cab, and just as I was turning to him to say something along the line of forgetting whatever the heck that was about to happen between us, he had already—I wasn't entirely sure when—leaned down, and my lips was unexpectedly caught between his.

"What was that?" I asked after he pulled away.

"Nothing," he answered. "I made my point—didn't want you to forget it, that's all. Goodnight." With that, he shut the car door and made his way back into the hotel.

He was a brat after all.

The driver asked me where I wanted to go, and I started to give him my address but stopped myself halfway and told him the address to the office instead. I didn't think I could wait a whole night to verify whether what Syaoran had said was true or not; I knew that I would've turned back and forth in my bed until I couldn't take it anymore and picked up the phone to call my brother—yelling at him probably. I didn't want that kind of confrontation.

O—o—x—o—O

O—o—x—o—O

I didn't know how long I'd been sitting in my brother's office, staring at the login screen on his computer. It was awful—the feeling that was building up inside of me. My hands were on the keyboard but my fingers wouldn't move.

"It's just three letters," I told myself. I only had to type in three very simple letters and hit enter.

Well, what did it mean?

What if I was able to successfully log in to my brother's computer?

What then?

Did it prove that my brother was a lying, cheating hypocrite? What could I do? Nothing. I didn't have the heart to tell my sister-in-law and possibly wreck their marriage, and I most definitely did not have the courage to tell our parents that their son had been hiding an earth shaking secret for so many years. The only option left was to confront my brother. But that opened a whole can of worms of _weird_ I'd rather not add to our perfectly normal relationship.

So wasn't it better not to pry further?

But then again… I owed it to my job to set things right with Syaoran and Yue.

I started typing: _Y-U-E_… and Enter.

It went through.

My brother was still in love with Yue.

My happily married—wait… _Was_ he 'happily' married?

Why did he marry Nakuru when he clearly had feelings for Yue?

"Okay, stop." I had to remind myself that this was more about Syaoran and Yue's relationship than my brother and Yue's. I'd have to set aside my brother's can of worms and wait for the right timing—hopefully that would be like never.

I didn't have much trouble finding Syaoran and Yue's files in the records system; I just didn't expect them to have so many. The folder Touya had given me had been so thin compared to the hundreds and hundreds of files that appeared on the screen. So my brother was withholding information from me?

I opened up a file titled ~_Sakura's Copy_, assuming that was what Touya had given me. The file listed the patients' name, date of birth, yadda yadda yadda, the general stuffs—everything I needed to know to do my job. Exiting out to the main folder, I clicked on the next file on the list: _Li Yue_.

Last Name… First Name… Date of Birth… yadda yadda yadda.

_Ah!_

Father: Fang Zhengwen

Mother: Fang Lele

Both were deceased. His mother passed away from child birth, and soon after he lost his father to leukemia; he was then adopted by Li Xueyou and his surname changed from Fang to Li. It was listed that Yue had an older brother—well, an adopted older brother. Li Jie.

_Lived in the Li's branch house_.

"Branch house? What the heck…" I decided that it was a rich people thing, something I would never understand in this lifetime.

_10th grade – Transferred to Tomoeda High._

I made a mental note to myself to find out why he'd moved to Tomoeda of all places. It seemed so random.

The man graduated top of his class and was accepted into some of the most prestigious universities in the country, but somehow he ended up going to Tomoeda University. I grimaced slightly; the thought of Yue possibly giving up those one in a lifetime opportunities in order to stay with my brother kept my stomach churning, rather unpleasantly.

He was working on his MBA but dropped out of school to take over the Li business when his brother passed away from a car accident. He was named Syaoran's sole guardian and interim leader of the Li clan—_seriously, what is up with these people?!_ Clan!? _Clan_?! Was that a nicer and much cleaner version of the '_mob_' or something?

"Lived in Hong Kong for a year…then moved back to Tomoeda in 2003…yadda yadda yadda."

Why did I feel like I was reading a PI's report?

I didn't understand why my brother had to give me a separate copy. Everything I'd read so far didn't mean anything—okay, they all meant something, but none of it were what one would consider _things-Sakura-doesn't-need-to-know_. Then there it was… On the very last page was a set of links referencing to various records of Yue; whoever prepared this clearly organized everything down to the last detail. Clicking on the first link opened a different file in a new window; it was a transcript of a session between Yue and a social worker, dated back to 1993. I skimmed through the first few pages, knowing that none of it was important, till something caught my eyes.

_X. Lin: What do you like to do for fun?  
Yue: For fun?  
X. Lin: Like, do you go outside to play, have friends over, go to the movies—what do you do to pass time?  
Yue: I garden with Wei.  
X. Lin: Your guardian? You two must have a very close relationship.  
Yue: He looks after me.  
X. Lin: Are you often alone with Wei at the house?  
Yue: Well, we're the only ones living there.  
X. Lin: Yue… do you know why you're seeing me right now?  
Yue: ...Where did those men take Wei?_

He'd sounded _so_ innocent—something tugged at my heart, a kind of pain that wasn't too entirely foreign to me.

I'd never forget the moment when Yuichi had told me, _"I was left alone a lot with my stepdad…"_

The disgust… the loathing… the hatred… the contempt… and the murderous rage that had bubbled from deep down inside of me then were now resurfacing. I struggled to read on; like how I'd struggled to listen to Yuichi tell his tale. I had to remind myself that this wasn't about me _or_ Yuichi.

There weren't any more information on this Wei person after that. I went from one file to the next, but he wasn't mentioned again. I wondered what had happened to him—probably punished by the law, or at least I hoped that was what had happened to him. It still angered me that Yuichi's stepdad had died from alcohol poisoning. It only seemed fitting that the piece of trash should've been stabbed to death in prison. In my opinion, Kami-sama had given him too much of an easy death. It wasn't fair.

I didn't realize I'd been up all night till I heard the elevator ding, followed by the sound of heels clacking.

"Miko?" I called out. Only she would come to work _this_ early.

She stood in the doorway a few seconds later with her mouth agape; clearly shocked that I'd actually came to work early and not on the dot for once.

"Are you unwell?" she asked. "Have you gone to see a doctor? Do you feel feverish?"

"I'm kind of insulted."

"What are you doing?"

"Oh, just some research," I replied shortly. "Can you make me a cup of coffee? Black this time."

"Sugar?"

"Please and thank you."

I looked back at the computer screen. Letting out a sigh, I leaned my head on the back of the chair and closed my eyes; I hadn't even started on any of the files related to Syaoran—heck, I wasn't even half-way done looking at Yue's stuffs. And let's just say the man had a lot of '_stuffs_'. In fact, his life story made mine look like a fairytale.

His adopted father passed away in a tragic fire accident when he was sixteen, and the place he called 'home' was also burned to the ground. Despite all of that, he was given a new house instead of being moved into the Li's main house. It was that same year that he moved to Tomoeda—though I still had no idea why he'd chosen Tomoeda of all places. From some documented letters, it seemed like that Yue had a good relationship with his adopted brother despite their ten years difference and the two kept in touch often.

I quickly opened my eyes when a knock suddenly startled me. "What are you doing here?" I asked the man—er, _person_ standing in the doorway.

"I told you to call." Syaoran had an irritated look on his face as he walked into the room carrying a cup of coffee in one hand. "You could've at least answered my messages. I thought the cab driver had taken you to a deserted place and raped you or something."

I pulled out my cellphone from my purse. "Dead," I told him. "How did you know I'd be here?"

"Wild guess I suppose," he said sarcastically, handing me the cup of coffee. "So…"

"So?" I looked at him questioningly while sipping the coffee.

"Didn't I tell you so?"

Lord. He was such a brat.

"I think I like it better when I thought you were an immature thirty-something-year-old man," I said. With him being _only_ nineteen, I couldn't tell him to grow up and act his age because he was already acting his age.

"I should feel insulted."

"Yet you don't?"

I could tell by the smug expression on his face that he had the perfect comeback at the tip of his tongue; thankfully Miko interrupted before the battle could start.

"Black coffee with—oh!" she paused at the sight of Syaoran. "Sakura, I didn't know you're starting your morning appointments again. Oh gosh, did you tell me and I'd somehow forgotten?"

I chuckled. "Relax, Miko. He's only visiting."

"Oh! Speaking of that, you have a visitor," said the other girl. "I seated him in your office."

"Did he state a name or what business he has with me?"

"No."

"Oh, okay. Thanks, Miko." After she left, I started to turn off my brother's computer before turning to Syaoran and asking, "Was there something else that you needed, or were you just _that_ worried about me?"

He snorted. "I only came to alleviate myself of any guilt or burdens that may result from telling you what you weren't ready to know."

"In other words, you're worried that I'll tell my brother that you told me his deep dark secret and he'll come after you."

"Let me make myself very clear: I am _not_ afraid of your brother."

"Yeah, right." One had to be either crazy or stupid to not fear Touya—and I meant _extremely_ stupid. "Come on, I'll walk you to the elevator."

"You're so kind to go out of your way," he drawled. "I mean the elevator is on the way to your office."

We started bickering again—well, I wasn't too sure if _bickering_ was the right word, for we weren't exactly arguing over petty things like Yue and I normally did in the presence of each other. Syaoran's and my _thing_ was more like a duel…with words. Verbal_ fencing_?

We were at the elevator and I would've followed Syaoran to continue our conversation until I got the last word, if not for the voice that had called out my name. It was a voice I still remembered very well, much to my surprise.

I gazed at the man standing before me; his messy brown hair, warm hazelnut eyes, and trademark grin. He was as irresistible as the first day I'd met him.

"Yuichi…" His name slipped so easily off of my tongue, I started to fear that I was going down that destructive path once again.

From the corner of my eye, I saw Syaoran tensing up beside me, his fists clenching. I thought his reaction was because of the things I'd told him about Yuichi and he was getting riled up on my behalf.

"This is a surprise," Yuichi said before I had the opportunity to ask what business he had with me. He walked towards my direction, and I really thought he was heading for me. The corner of his lips lifted into a smirk as he stopped in front of Syaoran and his next words had me gasping in horror. "Hello, brother."

* * *

«—**to be continued**—»

**A/N**: …and there's Yuichi -yayness!- I'm guessing Syaoran and Yue are not in a relationship after all? -snickers- I bet you're thinking 'As if we didn't know that already, Aesha!' ;)

This chapter hasn't been proofread yet so don't mind the mistakes ^^ Sorry it took so long to get this out! I'll probably go back and edit a few things later on, not really satisfied with this chapter—but oh well. I hate to be the bearer of bad news but it seems like I won't have time to work on the story, at least until my winter break in December (check out my profile for my rambling as to why not). Hope this chapter has answered some of your questions, but at the same time will keep you guys on your seat for the next chapter, whenever that'll be C:


	10. chains and whips

「L ◦ O ◦ V ◦ E」

_and_  
«—OTHER DISASTERS—»

.◦.

_Beta-reader_: Sakura-chan Master of the Clow

Chapter 10: chains and whips

O—o—x—o—O

O—o—x—o—O

O—o—x—o—O

O—o—x—o—O

"Hello, brother."

My head immediately snapped from one to the other. Okay so before I'd thought Syaoran shared similar features to Yuichi, but looking at them now, those two faces were the spit and image of each other. The only difference being Yuichi had about six years on Syaoran.

I'd met Yuichi's late mother, and he looked nothing like her. This could only mean both boys took after their father. If only that man was alive to see the scene that I was seeing. Oh the irony.

Yuichi then turned to me and asked how I'd been.

"I see you haven't changed at all," I said quietly. "I wonder what it'll take to wipe that smile off your face."

"_Hime_—"

"Do not call me that," I growled at him. "_Ever_ again."

I hated that despite the words that were coming out of my mouth, my heart had fluttered from the nickname and how endearing it had sounded coming from his lips.

O—o—x—o—O

O—o—x—o—O

_Before the night even started, I knew I shouldn't have agreed to go out with Tomoyo. Parties just weren't my thing._

_But Tomoyo had really wanted to go to this particular party for some reason, and I didn't have the heart to turn her down so I'd agreed to come. This guy came up to Tomoyo at the entrance when we arrived at the party, and from her reaction I knew almost immediately that he was the reason why she'd wanted to come so desperately. So I quietly left the two alone and found an empty corner to sit down, hoping to mind my own business until Tomoyo was ready to go home._

"_Hey, Princess—" I looked up at the boy standing before me. "Sitting all alone again?"_

_I didn't know him personally but I knew of him—_everyone_ on campus knew of him. His name was Kazuki Yuichi, and he was a notorious womanizer. He spoke to me all the time but I'd never actually talked to him. All my friends had all warned me to run in the opposite direction if I ever saw him, and that was what I usually did—turn tail and run._

_But there was nowhere to run here._

_He'd caught me in a corner, and I was helpless._

"_Go away, Kazuki." Tomoyo came to my rescue. "She's not part of your buffet lineup."_

"_Relax, Tomo-chan—I just thought she looked lonely sitting by herself. No ulterior motives, I swear."_

"_I'm warning you. Leave my friend alone," said Tomoyo. "Now shoo! Shoo!"_

"_Okay, okay! I'm going!" Before leaving, he turned to me and said with a smile, "Later, Princess."_

_Once he was out of sight, Tomoyo sat down next to me with an exasperated sigh. "What did you ever do to get _his _attention?" she asked._

"_I don't know," I replied shortly. "He just started talking to me one day."_

"_And what's with the 'princess' thing?" I shrugged my shoulders and she continued, "Well no matter. Just stay clear from him, guys like him are trouble."_

"_Guys like him?"_

"_You know he's known as 'The Dark Prince', right? They say one kiss from him and you're done for."_

"_Really?"_

"_I wouldn't know. Haven't kissed him yet," said Tomoyo._

_I raised an eyebrow at her choice of words. "Yet?"_

"_One should never say never." After we calmed down from laughing our heads off, Tomoyo said to me, "Sorry I left you by yourself…again. I'm usually the one dragging you out to these parties so it's my job to make sure you have fun, but I'm failing miserably, aren't I? I feel really bad, I really do, Sakura. Please forgive me!"_

_I loved that about Tomoyo—she was always thinking of me. She was the greatest friend I could ever ask for, and we shared everything with each other. That's why when I caught sight of a very good looking guy in my intro to psychology class, I'd literally run back to our dorm to tell Tomoyo. Of course she then told me I had to find a new eye-candy because he was the poison apple that killed Snow White—and, yes, she did say that, word for word._

"_So who was that guy?" I asked._

_She quickly avoided my gaze. "What guy?"_

"_Tomoyo…"_

"_Oh, you mean the guy I was talking to? He's the host. He invited me to the party, so I just wanted to thank him."_

"_You mean he's _just _the host?"_

"_Okay. So you know how I wait at the library for you to finish your evening class? Well I met him there on the second week of school and we've been sharing the same table ever since. His name is Eriol and he's a second year law student. He's really nice, funny, smart…and he smells really good."_

"…_Tomoyo…" I tried to word my question as best as I could without freaking the girl out. "Do you, by any chance, _like _him?"_

"_What?! Sakura, you're crazy! He's just a friend!" she declared, looking in said boy's direction._

_To be honest, I was actually surprised to see that _this _was the party Tomoyo had desperately wanted to go to. For sure I'd thought it was going to be some wild best-party-of-the-year kind of deal. Not counting the music that was playing in the background, this was a pretty chilled party; people were just standing around chatting, no one was drunk and the topics of discussion were politics, business, academia, and pretty much anything that required a person to use their brain, something you do not expect at college parties._

"_Besides…" Tomoyo continued slowly, "He's not exactly my type…and he's almost as old as Touya—yuck!"_

_This Eriol guy most definitely was not Tomoyo's type. She had been captain of the cheerleading team back in high school, and she'd always dated jocks and guys with half a brain but looks that could kill._

_On the other hand—my eyes moved to the boy standing beside Tomoyo's new friend—Kazuki Yuichi fit Tomoyo's ideal man down to the letter T. And I was sure that Tomoyo knew that, so I was stormed by the fact that she hadn't gone after him already. Sure he had a bad reputation, but Daidouji Tomoyo had always liked challenges, especially if she came out on top. And she would always come out on top._

_I flushed when Kazuki Yuichi suddenly caught me staring at him. He smiled slightly and I quickly diverted my gaze. Oh gosh, how embarrassing._

_When I was sure that he'd looked away, I stole another glance at him. What was he doing at this party anyway? I knew for sure that this wasn't his kind of scene, but he made it seem as though this was a regular occurrence to him. He was standing on the other side of the room with a large group of people, and they were talking about foreign politics, the upcoming U.S. election to be more precise._

_I began to notice that he smiled every time he talked and a dimple would appear on his left cheek._

_Kami-sama…he was so handsome._

_Our eyes met, but for some reason I didn't turn away this time._

_He smiled again, and the strangest thing happened…_

_I smiled back at him._

o-x-o

_The following day he sat next to me in class._

"_So you've finally acknowledged my existence?"_

_I looked at him but I didn't respond to his question. It was a mistake for me to return his smile at the party. But it wasn't like I'd wanted to smile at him. I was just caught up in the moment. I mean, he had a very infectious smile—anyone who had seen him smile would attest to that._

"_Oh I see not," he said. "You're certainly hard to crack, Princess."_

_I really wanted to know why he kept calling me 'Princess'. But I decided not to._

_A professor walked into the room and announced that today's class would be a study session because our regular professor could not make it. I promptly opened my notebook to start going over my notes. From my peripheral vision, I saw Kazuki Yuichi laying his head down on the table and folding his arms in front of his face. I didn't care that he was sleeping instead of using the time wisely to study, but the thing was…he _wasn't_ sleeping. I could feel his eyes staring straight at me from behind his bangs._

_I started to lose my concentration and the words on the pages became a blur to me._

"_Stop it," I finally said to him in a low whisper._

"_Stop what?" he answered back._

_I looked at him, exasperated. "Stop staring at me."_

"_I can't."_

"_And why not?"_

_He propped his head on one elbow and said, smiling, "You're really pretty."_

o-x-o

"_What's going on with you and Kazuki Yuichi?" Tomoyo and the girls questioned me during lunch one day._

"_Nothing," I replied._

"_He's been walking you here every day after your psych class," Naoko remarked casually. "Kazuki Yuichi simply does not walk girls. He only picks them up and drops them."_

"_He's…different than I thought he'd be," I said. Four forks dropped to the table simultaneously. "I know what his reputation is, I'm not that stupid."_

"_Then stay away from him," said Chiharu._

"_Sakura, we're not trying to tell you who you can or cannot see, but we just don't want to see you get hurt," Rika said. "If you want to be friends with him, that's perfectly fine, but try to keep your heart on guard. He's the school's number one womanizer for good reasons."_

_The table became very quiet afterwards._

_I didn't know how to tell my friends that my heart was already in danger._

_I knew that I should stay clear of Kazuki Yuichi and shouldn't even think of him romantically, but he was so…so…he was nothing I'd experienced before. Sure I'd dated a few times in high school, but I didn't consider that to be _real_ dating. I hadn't considered any of those guys to be my 'boyfriend' because we hadn't been serious enough for me to call any of them that._

_Kazuki Yuichi made me so aware of the fact that I was a girl and he was a boy._

"_Anyway…" Chiharu was the one to break the silence. "Takashi is throwing a birthday party on Saturday. We're all going so you better figure something out now if you have homework or studying to do for Monday, because I promise that you will not be able to get out of bed Sunday morning."_

"_Oh! Would he mind if I bring a friend?" asked Tomoyo._

"_Eriol?" we all voiced at once._

"_We're just friends," she said. "He's not my type."_

_She was so in denial._

_At least I had no problem admitting that I was attracted to Kazuki—well, admit to myself that is._

o-x-o

_At Takashi's party, I left the girls to use the bathroom. They didn't make much of a fuss with me going on my own since it was Takashi's place and everyone knew I was like a sister to him. No one was stupid enough to mess with me while on Yamazaki Takashi's turf unless they wanted the school's baseball team going after them._

_I decided that the bathroom in Takashi's room was probably a lot cleaner than the guest bathroom downstairs so I started to make my way upstairs. I pushed my way through the crowd of people who were just hanging out in the hallway, some were smoking and drinking, some were making out, while some were just passed out on the floor._

_I seriously contemplated hiding in Takashi's room until the party was over._

_I was just about to reach Takashi's room when a hand suddenly grabbed onto my wrist and I was jerked backward, my body slamming into my captor's._

"_Hey, guys, look! It's Kazuki's new toy," the unknown person said, his breath reeked of alcohol. "She's a cutie, ain't she?"_

"_Dude you're making your deathbed," someone yelled out._

"_What? I ain't scared of him!"_

"_Care to say that to my face?" Kazuki was just standing a few feet away, a menacing look on his face, a look I'd never seen before. It was the first time I'd seen him without a smile on his face._

_My captor laughed. "Don't tell me you actually _care _about this one!"_

_Kazuki looked like he was about to the answer the question. But before any word could come out of his mouth, I'd already taken advantage of my captor's distracted state to twist my arm around and knee his groin as hard as I could. One might say that the biggest advantage to having Touya as my brother was learning to defend myself against someone much larger than me._

_After freeing myself I continued with my original quest: bathroom. Too bad I really had to pee because I would've loved to stay there for a few more minutes and savor the expression on Kazuki's face._

_He was sitting on Takashi's bed when I came out of the bathroom._

"_What were you thinking going off on your own?"_

"_It's Takashi's place, I'm pretty safe here," I said._

_He scowled. "Then what was that a moment ago?"_

"_He was just a drunken idiot. If he had half of his brain, he wouldn't have even tried to touch me. And clearly I was able to take care of myself," I retorted._

_Running a hand through his hair, he let out a sigh and said, "You're one surprise after another, Hime."_

"_Why do you call me 'princess'?" I asked, sitting down next to him._

"_Are you sure you really want to know?"_

"_Yes. I mean, if I remember correctly, I never talked to you or did anything for you to give me that nickname."_

"_I sort of met you last year…" he said._

"What_?!"_

"_Well, not exactly _meet_ per se," he continued. "It was at the movies. I bumped into a friend of mine in the men's room and he started complaining how his date's older brother tagged along—" My face paled at those words. "—and forced everyone to watch some princess movie. I thought it was fitting to think of you as the princess and your brother the dragon."_

_So his nickname was just a way of poking fun at me._

"_I'm glad my suffering amused you."_

_I turned to leave the room but he grabbed my wrist and pulled me towards him, catching me as I fell onto his lap._

"_It has become a kind of endearment really," he said with a chuckle._

"_I am not your toy, Kazuki."_

"_You're not."_

_His face came closer to mine._

"_Please stop it."_

"_Don't make me feel like this again," he said. "I don't know what I'll do next time."_

_And closer…_

"_Feel like what?"_

"_Jealousy—it's a nasty feeling."_

…_And closer…_

"_Why would you be jealous?"_

"_I don't know."_

…_Till our lips finally met._

O—o—x—o—O

O—o—x—o—O

"Go home, Syaoran."

Said boy looked at me with an irritated look on his face. "Why are you only telling _me_ to go home?"

"Syaoran, just go home," I said, pinching the bridge of my nose. "You don't actually think he's here to see me because he misses me, do you? That is too unlike him. So the faster you leave, the quicker I can get rid of him."

"You—" Syaoran jabbed me with his index finger. "Just keep repeating in your head: _Syaoran looks better than this guy, Syaoran looks better than this guy, Syaoran looks better than this guy_. And you'll be fine."

"B-Baka! Just get out of here!" I shouted and stomped all the way to my office.

…But in all honesty, I couldn't hold back the small smile on my face. He was certainly something.

"So you two seem relatively close for a therapist and patient," Yuichi coolly remarked upon entering my office, shutting the door behind him.

I observed him quietly from behind my desk. "Oh, we're close enough."

He flinched slightly at my words.

"Brothers huh?" I asked.

"Funny thing, isn't it? So how close?"

"What's your definition of _close_?"

A frown appeared on his face. "As much as I'd love to continue this conversation, I'm here for an entirely different reason."

"Of course," I said, putting on my professional voice. "So what can I do for you, Kazuki-san?"

"I need to speak to your sister-in-law," he said. "Tomo-chan's husband—Eriol, was it?—isn't too ecstatic to see my face. I was hoping you could give me Nakuru's personal contact number."

"And may I ask what for?"

"It's a need to know basis, and you don't need to know."

"You don't sound like someone who's asking for a favor," I said dryly.

"I'm sorry. Did I forget to say please?" he countered; smiling.

"You can call the law firm and leave your contact information with Nakuru's secretary. If I happen to speak with Nakuru any time soon, I'll let her know that you're trying to get in touch with her. Please leave if you don't need anything else, I have to get back to work."

"You haven't changed yourself," he said, walking towards the door.

I glowered at him. "And what's that supposed to mean?"

"It means—" He paused in the doorway with a peculiar smile on his face. "—I'm back, Princess."

O—o—x—o—O

O—o—x—o—O

_This morning, like most mornings, I got up and took a long hot shower. I paid no attention to the other (unoccupied) side of the bed; I'd learned to ignore the slight indentation in the pillow and wrinkled sheets. Of course, even if I did want to pretend that _it _didn't happen, nothing was ever in my control._

"_Please tell that horrid person to use the fire escape outside your room from now," said Tomoyo when I came out into the living room. "Or text me if he's spending the night. I'd rather avoid seeing his face altogether."_

"_All-nighter?" I asked, eyeing the scattered sheets of paper all over the floor._

"_I have to present a sketchbook of my designs to the teacher today," she explained._

"_I thought you already completed your sketchbook."_

"_She told me to go back to the drawing board—think outside of the box and my comfort zone, that kind of thing."_

"_Ooh, she's a tough one. Want coffee?"_

"_Sure."_

_I went into the kitchen and prepared a pot of coffee. While the coffee was brewing, I pulled a mug out from the cabinet and went to open the fridge. The shelves were practically bare; obviously I needed to go shopping soon. A half empty gallon of milk and a few cups of yogurt were all the food we had left. I shut the fridge after grabbing the milk. Luckily I noticed the expiration date on the carton right before opening it. Great—just great._

_I left the milk and mug on the counter as they were and walked back out into the living._

"_The coffee is brewing. It should be done soon," I said, grabbing my keys off the side table. "But we're out of milk so you'll have to drink it black."_

"_Oh, okay." Tomoyo sounded kind of confused. "Where are you going?"_

"_I'm meeting with Touya for breakfast," I replied shortly. "I'll see you later."_

o-x-o

"_Is everything okay between you and Tomoyo?"_

_I put down my blueberry muffin—suddenly losing my appetite—and looked at my brother questioningly._

_He went on, "Mom said Aunt Sonomi mentioned something about Tomoyo eating out all the time now and not having to split the utilities anymore."_

"_Oh that. I feel bad because she's at our place probably like once every two or three weeks, it's not fair asking her to pay half, so I've insisted that she doesn't."_

"_She's living with four-eyes?"_

"_She's officially moving in with Eriol next semester," I said. "I'm not supposed to say anything to the family yet, so don't tell Mom or Auntie."_

"_Next semester? What are you going to do with an entire apartment by yourself?"_

"_That's assuming if I have the money for rent, but it's not like I can ask Mom and Dad to pay the other half of rent either. Maybe Rika will want to move in with me, or I can just get a part-time job. Or—"_

"_You are _not _moving in with that bastard," growled Touya, his mouth full of food._

_I let out an exasperated sigh. "That hasn't even crossed my mind. And would you please stop calling him 'bastard'? It's really mean and hurtful."_

"_Good," he said with a snort. "It's meant to be."_

"_You are hopeless, Onii-chan. But I was going to suggest that I could find a much cheaper place."_

"_Forget it. Cheap places won't give you the kind of security that you have now," said my brother. "Nakuru and I will take care of your rent, including the half that Mom and Dad are paying now."_

"_I can't let you do that."_

"_Just shut up and say thank you." Touya then grimaced slightly. "But if you really want to thank me, you can break up with that bas—fucker."_

"_We're not dating," I told him._

"_Stop seeing him then."_

"_Haven't we had this conversation before?"_

_He grunted in displeasure, his lips forming a series of silent curses directed at the absent object of our discussion. My brother had always been strict and very opinionated when it came to the subject of me dating. And although his over-protectiveness annoyed me every now and then, for the most part I'd always taken his impressions of the guys I dated into serious consideration; in fact, I'd always dumped a guy if my brother didn't find any likeable quality in them. Yuichi was an exemption. And that bothered Touya all the more; the fact that there was even an exemption._

"_So Tomoyo is rarely at the apartment?" Touya asked. "You better not be having a certain _guest _over every night. I swear if you get knocked up—"_

"_Onii-chan, I really don't want to have _the talk _with you again!"_

"_I'm just refreshing your memory."_

"_I get it, okay? Moving on now, please!"_

"_Well, do you get lonely? You know you're welcome to stay with us every now and then."_

"_Onii-chan, I'm fine," I said._

"_Kaijuu—"_

"_Gosh—I'm fine, so just drop it already! S-Sorry…I didn't sleep very well," I lied. I hadn't meant to raise my voice. I just didn't want to admit it to my brother—that, yes, I found myself very much alone in that apartment._

_I didn't blame Tomoyo or anything. I mean, I was happy that she got to spend every waking minute with her boyfriend, and that the two of them were so in love with each other. They'd been dating for almost a year and they were _still _in the honeymoon stage._

_It was just… sometimes, I wished there was someone to talk to at night, someone to spill all of my day's stress and frustration to. I just…I missed having her _there_. I missed knowing that she was sleeping right down the hall. I missed coming home after school and watching variety shows with her. I also missed getting ready for school in the morning with her, like how she would always do my hair and makeup and tell me what she thought of the outfit I'd picked out. I missed my best friend._

_I was fully aware of the fact that Tomoyo's life didn't revolve around me, and I didn't expect it to be like that either. I also knew that Tomoyo and I were still best friends no matter what._

_I just didn't like that we had been almost inseparable one day and the next… Well, that's life for you. I didn't have any right to complain._

"_Are you eating properly?" asked Touya. "You look like you've lost some weight."_

"_Yes, I'm eating properly," I said. Whenever I felt like eating anyway. Of course I couldn't tell him that. Knowing my brother, he would flip out._

_I didn't have much of an appetite nowadays. I didn't starve myself or anything. I had lunch with the girls every day, so I was eating at least one meal a day._

"_You know, kaijuu," my brother started saying. "You can come and talk to me about anything—even about that jackass. He makes my blood boil, but you are my sister, and despite how much I am against your relationship, on some level, I actually do understand where you are coming from. To like someone who you know you shouldn't be liking… I—I…"_

"_Onii-chan?"_

_I thought my brother was acting kind of weird._

"…_Nothing. Perhaps another day," he said. "What time's your class?"_

"_Ten-thirty," I answered and looked at the time. "I still have half an hour and it's only a 10 minute walk from here. By the way, have you found out where you'll be going for your residency yet?"_

"_Not yet, but it's most likely going to be Tokyo. I'll be surprised if they match me up with any other place."_

"_So you and Nee-san will basically be separated for four years?"_

"_Don't say 'separated'—it gives the wrong impression."_

"_But isn't that what it is? You two are such workaholics. Mom and Dad are dying to have grandkids, but I think they've given up on you so the responsibility falls on me apparently."_

"_Nakuru and I aren't in a position to be having kids. I'll be starting my residency and she's working to become a partner in her law firm. Not to mention that I was finishing up med school when we married, there hasn't been any time."_

_I snorted. "You finishing your undergrad in two and half years is enough proof of your workaholism."_

"_Yeah, yeah, whatever… Well, I'm going to go. Call Mom and Dad more often, even if it's just to say hello," he said. "They worry a lot you know. They try not to make you feel cornered, but they're still only parents and you'll always be their little girl. Your boy-toy situation doesn't make them sleep any easier at night. Put yourself in their shoes, Sakura."_

"_Okay, I—" I stopped._

_Oh, God. I'd known that campus was small, but why did he have to suddenly appear here of all places? There were plenty of other restaurants near campus. Really, fate was too cruel._

_Touya turned around to see what had caught my attention. His eyes turned murderous within a second, and without a moment of hesitation, he strode over to the entrance where Yuichi and another girl were standing—they were clearly _too_ familiar with each other; at least my brother thought so, judging from his reaction._

"_You—" Touya grabbed Yuichi by the collar. "Outside now."_

_I went after them. "Onii-chan, stop it!"_

_Once outside, Touya shoved Yuichi up against the wall and held him by the neck. I yelled for him to stop again and even attempted to put myself between the two of them, but Touya just pushed me aside. My brother was physically larger and stronger than most guys; if he wanted to, he could've probably killed Yuichi then and there._

"_I don't care what sort of agreement you two may have with each other," growled Touya, his grip on Yuichi tightening, "but if you dare to parade your toys in front of my sister again, I will make you wish that you were never born. I swear on it."_

_Touya let go and Yuichi was left gasping for air._

"_Onii-chan…I—I…"_

"_Right now you're probably telling yourself that you're happy with just being near him—to talk to him, to see him smile, to hear him laugh—that nothing else matters so long as you can be with him." I didn't understand the look on my brother's face. He was looking at me but it felt like he was looking at someone else. "But I assure you, one day…one day you'll want more, and when you come to the realization that you can't have more, you'll hate yourself for being so…fucking…stupid."_

O—o—x—o—O

O—o—x—o—O

"The world is seriously too small," I concluded after recollecting the events in the last 24-hours of my life to Tomoyo. "I really want to move somewhere far, far away—where I know no one and no one knows me. I'll miss you terribly though, Tomoyo. And your delicious cooking—screw it, I'll take you with me!"

She was sweet enough to bring me food after I told her on the phone that I couldn't come over for dinner because I was going to stay back at the office. She leaned over my shoulder and briefly skimmed through the content that was displayed on the computer screen. I quickly turned off the monitor.

"I love you and all, but I can't let you do that," I said to her. "Confidential information—you know that sort of thing."

Tomoyo rolled her eyes. "You're no fun. So what are you going to do now?"

"About what?"

"Everything."

"There's too much to handle all at once," I said. "I have to speak with my brother, decide what I'm going to do with Yuichi, catch up on the Yue and Syaoran situation, fix their relationship, and more importantly, stay away from Syaoran."

Tomoyo raised a slender eyebrow in the air and asked, "Is the last one hard to do?"

I knew what she was implying, and I really shouldn't be encouraging her, but I answered anyway, "Maybe."

"Is it because Syaoran looks like him?"

"I'll be lying if I say that isn't how it is at all," I replied, quietly. "And that's why I need to stay away from him. He…he's just a kid."

"He's nineteen," said Tomoyo. "That's _hardly_ a kid in my book. Nakuru is five years older than Touya—I think you can find some sort of ironic play by fate there."

"Speaking of Nakuru, what did Eriol tell you?" I asked.

"Eriol said that he called security the second that he saw what-his-face," said Tomoyo, beaming. "I'm so proud of my hubby."

"Of course you are. Thanks for the food again."

"Don't overwork yourself."

"I know," I said. "But there's no helping it. Touya comes back in like two weeks. I have to at least _do_ something by then."

"Okay, but at least go home tonight. You look like you could use a good night sleep and a shower or two."

I let out a heavy sigh after smelling myself. "Life can't possibly get any worse."

Tomoyo chuckled and patted me on the back. "Don't tempt it."

O—o—x—o—O

O—o—x—o—O

It was around two in the morning when I woke up to my home phone ringing. I hadn't slept for very long either. I'd called it a night and left the office a little after midnight, and I'd fallen asleep as soon as my head hit the pillow; I hadn't known I was so tired.

I debated between walking out into the living room to answer the call and ignoring it completely. I decided to go with the latter, except it was only a second after my home phone stopped ringing that my cellphone started blasting.

I grabbed my phone from the night-table; it was a restricted number. My first thought was, it better not be the police department.

"Kinomoto Sakura speaking," I answered groggily.

"About time you pick up," growled the all-too-familiar voice on the other line.

"Onii-chan? What's wrong?"

"I need you to go check on the brat for me." My brother's voice sounded urgent for some reason.

"What brat?"

"The Li brat. Ask the receptionist for an access card."

"Um…okay… do you mind telling me why?"

"Sakura, just shut up and do it. Call me after you check on him. Do you have something to write with? I'll give you the number to reach me."

"I already have your hotel number."

"…The number is XX—"

"W-Wait!" I managed to grab a nearby pen but I didn't know where to begin looking for a piece of paper so I hurriedly wrote the number on my hand. My brother hung up before I could ask once more why he wanted me to check on Syaoran.

I couldn't tell if I was frustrated or nervous. It was unnerving thinking that another disastrous thing was about to happen, but something didn't feel right at the pit of my stomach.

The receptionist didn't make much of a fuss when I told her that I needed the access card to the penthouse suite; in fact, she'd literally handed the card over to me with a smile on her face and said, "Enjoy your night, Miss."

Even the liftman smiled at me.

Oh gosh…they thought I was Syaoran's late-night call girl. I was so mortified. My current attire did not help the situation either. I'd just slipped a big jacket over my nightclothes and out the door I went. I didn't stop to examine how the jacket made it seem like I wasn't wearing anything underneath.

I got off the elevator as soon as it stopped and practically ran to the door at the end of the hallway.

"Hey, Syaoran?"

It was nearly three in the morning—he should've been home.

"Syaoran?" I called out again after getting no response the first time.

I checked his bedroom but he wasn't there, and I really thought my brother had sent me on a wild-goose chase; I mean, geez, I could've been sleeping in my warm bed. I was about to leave when I noticed that the door to Yue's bedroom was slightly open, it was completely shut the last time I was here. Yue wasn't back, was he?

I pushed the door back very carefully. "Syaoran?"

"Leave, Sakura."

I gasped at the sight before my eyes.

Oh, Kami-sama, what had my brother gotten me into?

O—o—x—o—O

O—o—x—o—O

_I didn't understand what my brother said that day, but I reflected back on his words every now and then—all the time actually._

_Did I want more?_

_My eyes found their way to the dance floor where Yuichi was dancing with another girl, their bodies pressed against each other and his hands on her hips. He was whispering something into the girl's ear, and she threw her head back with a big smile before leaning in to kiss him._

_You'd think I'd be used to it by now._

_But I wasn't._

"_Here." A bartender suddenly handed me a drink. "You look like you could use this—go over there and dump it on his head."_

_I laughed and accepted the drink, but I drank it instead. "I have no right to do that," I told him._

"_You two aren't dating?" He sounded surprised. "I always see you come and leave together. We—" he pointed to himself and this other bartender behind the bar, "—thought you two are like one of those freaky couples who get off by seeing each other flirt with other people at bars."_

"_No, we're not together," I said. "Or freaky."_

_The other bartender grinned and said something about paying up. At the wondering look on my face, he kindly explained, "We made a bet. I said that you're hopelessly in love with him."_

"_I never said anything about being in love with him," I pointed out to them._

_The one who supposedly won the bet walked off with a smug smile._

"_It's written all over your face, hun," said the bartender who first talked to me. "The name is Shun."_

"_Sakura. And is it really? Written all over my face, that is."_

_Shun leaned over the bar top and motioned for me to get closer, which I did. "Like an open book."_

"_How embarrassing," I remarked, quietly._

_A big smile suddenly appeared on Shun's face._

"_You're welcome," he whispered to me before disappearing to tend to someone else._

_Feeling a tap on my shoulder, I turned to find Yuichi standing behind me with his eyebrows furrowed together as his eyes followed Shun's back. "You know him?" he asked._

"_Nope, we just met actually. He gave me a free drink," I explained._

"_Let's dance," he said, pulling me onto the dimly lit dance floor._

_He wrapped his arms around my waist, and I leaned on his shoulder with my arms around his back as we swayed slowly to the music. I saw the girl he was just dancing with a few seconds ago, standing on the side with her hands on her hips as if saying she couldn't believe what she was seeing. I couldn't help but smile smugly at her reaction._

_He only danced the slow songs with me._

_It was moments like this that kept me believing that I was special._

O—o—x—o—O

O—o—x—o—O

He was lying on the bed, bottomless, with his hands tied together by the wrists above his head, as little trails of blood slicked his thighs.

"You'd rather let your housekeepers see you like this?" I went to untie his wrists; trying very hard not to stare at his lower-half. It wasn't till he rolled over to the other side of the bed that I noticed the small blood stain on the sheets from under him. I didn't know much about anal intercourse, but I knew bleeding wasn't a good sign. Actually, none of the signs were _good_. "We should get you to a doctor."

"I'm fine," he said stubbornly. "I just need to take a shower."

"Wha—"

"_Leave_," he barked before I could finish my question.

He limped across the room to the bathroom and shut the door behind him. Minutes later I heard the water running. I wanted to pull my hair and scream; what was I to do? Clearly I was out of my area of expertise.

Remembering my brother, I took out my phone and began to dial the number he'd given me. The line rang twice before he picked up. "Hello?"

"Onii-chan," I said. "What do I do?"

"Is he okay?"

"What's your definition of 'okay'?"

"Is he distressed? Alarmed? Terrified? You're a _counselor_, Sakura—don't make me tell you how to do your job."

"This _isn't_ my job," I snapped at him. "This is _your_ mess that I'm cleaning up."

"What are you trying to say?"

"I'm saying that you should've known better than to become your ex-lover's psychiatrist!"

"H-How did you—"

"Does it really matter how I know?" I said almost bitingly. "Did you know that Syaoran was Yuichi's half-brother? Were you _ever_ going to tell me?"

"Sakura, now isn't the time. I need you to—" I heard a faint voice in the background and my brother's own frustration as he said to the other person, "No, you can't speak with her. I said no, goddamnit!"

"Was that Nee-san?" I asked. "I need to ask her something."

"…Your sister isn't here."

"Well, who is it? From what you said, it sounds like I know the person— ...Oh, God… Touya, where is Nee-san…? And please tell me you're not with Yue!"

"I want to see you in my office first in the morning. And stay with the brat for the night," was the last thing he said before hanging up.

Afterwards, I tried calling the hotel number where my brother and sister were supposed to stay, but I couldn't get a hold of Nakuru.

A storm was coming…and coming fast.

* * *

«—**to be continued**—»

**A/N**: Now you know why I snickered last chapter. Moral of the story: Don't trust Aesha until the fat lady sings (~_^) Why haven't you guys figured that out already?! #totallytrolling C: hehehe. But don't worry, I'll reveal all next chapter—no more mind games. I'm getting bored of charades, as I'm sure you are too C:

Well, see y'all after my final exams! Wish me luck (^_^)!


	11. mind over matter

「L ◦ O ◦ V ◦ E」  
_and_  
«—OTHER DISASTERS—»

.◦.

.◦.

Chapter 11: mind over matter

O—o—x—o—O

O—o—x—o—O

O—o—x—o—O

O—o—x—o—O

Syaoran came out with nothing but a towel draped around his neck, his hair still dripping slightly. How did one flaunt one's self so shamelessly and look wonderful doing it?

"You're still here?" he asked, though he didn't stay to hear my response.

I followed after him, my eyes never leaving the ceiling for I was too afraid to look elsewhere; although, it was tempting.

"You should be nicer to me," I said to him as we entered his room. I let my eyes roam his back, and a tremor coursed through my body. I never did stand a chance against temptation. "It might be the last time you'll ever see me."

He stopped at the dresser and turned his head to glance at me briefly. As if he'd finally learned some modesty, he took the towel from his neck and wrapped it around his waist. Only now I could see little droplets of water trickle down his neck, ever so slowly, going lower and lower till they disappeared under the plush white towel, leaving it to my imagination to piece together what lay south of border.

"Oh?"

I wasn't sure if he was raising his eyebrows at my earlier statement or my equally shameless gawking.

"Don't tell me that you're moving away because _he's_ back," Syaoran said, disdain for the aforementioned man written plainly on his face.

"That's a very good suggestion actually. I should totally move away!" He rolled his eyes at my dramatic display. "—except I'm talking about Touya. He's coming back tomorrow."

"Tch," he snorted. "That was rather quick."

I didn't bother asking what he had meant by that. Knowing him, he wouldn't have answered.

"Do you…um…do you want to—_ahem_—you know, talk about it?" I asked instead.

"No."

"Are you sure? I mean, I promise that whatever you say will stay between us. And I'm not saying this as your therapist but as a friend—well, deep-dark-secrets-sharing-partner-thingy."

He slipped into a pair of pajama shorts and slid beneath the sheets. I waited for a response from him. Nothing.

"Ahem," I cleared my voice.

He responded by clapping his hands, turning off the lights.

Well, if that was how he wanted to play...

I let out an exasperated sigh and climbed into the unoccupied side of the bed, my back facing him.

His head jerked up almost immediately. "What are you doing?"

"Sleeping," I said matter-of-factly, turning my head and looking at him as if asking what else could I be doing. It was late, or early, depending on how one looked at it, and I refused to let his employees see me leave before the sun was even up (again).

"_Here_?"

I almost laughed the incredulous look on his face. Too incredulous, as if he couldn't quite believe that I was there—in his bed, with him, just the two of us. He must've realized that he'd overreacted for he suddenly rolled onto his stomach and his head disappeared somewhere under the pillows.

"So what did he want?" I heard him ask a few moments later, his voice muffled by the way his head was buried under the mountain of pillows. Seriously, did a man need so many pillows?

"Won't know till tomorrow," I mumbled groggily.

"I wasn't asking about your brother."

"Oh, you were referring to _your_ brother. My bad," I retorted, pulling the blanket up to hide my smirk.

"I remember you pushing me off your bed once," he said, an irritated edge to his voice. "Shall I return the favor?"

"Nothing…he didn't want anything—at least, not with me."

"Are you disappointed?"

I rolled onto my back and stared into the darkness. In order to be disappointed, I had to have been expecting something. _Had_ I wanted something? Like for him to tell me that he'd come back for me… that I'd crossed his mind at least as many times as he'd appeared in my dreams… that he'd missed me, and that leaving me was the hardest and most painful thing he had have to experience.

I shook my head with a chuckle. "No," I finally said. "I wasn't disappointed."

"Hn."

"You don't believe me?"

"I believe you."

"Just as much as I believe you should I ask if you are okay and you answer yes," I said.

"Go to sleep," he snapped back.

"Good night, Syaoran."

I realized that I should've been more persistent in getting him to talk about whatever the heck took place…but, honest to god, I just didn't _want_ to.

I mean, Touya was coming back the next morning, wasn't he? _Starting tomorrow this won't be my problem_, I thought to myself. And it was the truth wasn't it? Syaoran and Yue weren't my patients to begin with. So I wasn't able to mitigate the rift between uncle and nephew, but that hadn't been my fault. Okay, it was _partially_ my fault. The fact of the matter, however, was that all of it, everything from Syaoran to Yue to Touya—past, present, future—was beyond my control.

_Control_, I snorted in my mind. I was in way over my head.

Whatever problem between Syaoran and Yue was complicated enough when I thought it was just a family thing, but clearly it was more than that and had nothing to do at all with _family_.

And I had no desire to involve myself in something so complicated. I could hardly handle my own complicated relationship, let alone tackle a _mess_ that even Touya would have to acknowledge that he'd bitten more than he could chew.

I was done with complications.

For once, was it too much to ask for some _simplicity_ in my life?

O—o—x—o—O

O—o—x—o—O

"You were told to stay with the brat, not sleep with him."

I didn't have to open my eyes to know whose voice it was. And apparently neither did Syaoran, because he stirred next to me as he said, "Go away, Touya," and pulled me closer.

_So warm_, I thought as I nuzzled my face into his chest. My eyes shot open, the light blinding me momentarily. Why was I lying in Syaoran's arms?

"What time is it?" I groaned out loud and pushed myself away from Syaoran; instantly regretting doing so because it was suddenly very cold. Too cold. I wondered if it was at all possible for me to sneak back into my previous position without Touya noticing.

"It's almost noon," said my brother, his voice as chirpy as ever (which was never). "You were supposed to be in my office first thing in the morning."

"Yeah, well, anything to stall my execution."

"Get up. We'll talk over lunch."

"Not hungry," Syaoran interjected.

"I'm not talking to you," growled Touya. "Don't you have classes today?"

"Skipping."

Touya merely grunted, "Today only, gaki."

"You're not the boss of me."

"You better count your lucky stars that your guardianship hasn't fallen to me," drawled Touya, "_yet_, that is. I mean, who knows what might happen between now and your birthday. Think on _that_ the next time you decide to be insolent. Kaijuu, be downstairs in five."

"What," grumbled Syaoran after we heard Touya walking away, "did your parents do for him to become the man he is today?"

I smacked him with a pillow. "I'll have you know that my parents are extremely lovely people."

"Then what happened?"

"We lost him for a few years after he hit puberty," I said as I willed myself to get up. "I think he may have been brainwashed and raised by a wolf during that time."

"A _silver_ wolf?"

I smiled, sliding off the bed. "Could have been, I don't know."

"Good luck," he called out as I left the room, "I'll come to your funeral, if I'm not too busy."

"You _are_ insolent!" I found myself laughing. Why? I had no idea. Clearly, I'd lost my mind.

Perhaps it was the nerves of my impending confrontation with Touya, who obviously meant to spend his precious lunchtime discussing whatever it was that we needed to talk about—and call me pessimistic, but if that wasn't the start to a very bad day, really, I didn't know what was.

Or, perhaps, I'd wanted to end our—Syaoran's and mine, that is—_acquaintance_ on a good note. I had no intention of seeing him again. It wasn't like I was going to _avoid_ him. I was just going to, you know, _stay clear_ from him. Now that Touya was back, I really had no reason to see Syaoran again, and I didn't want to see him again. He reminded me too much of everything that was wrong with my life. My old life, the one I wanted to desperately move on from.

Touya could handle it, he could help the boy.

And speaking of my brother… As I approached him, I noticed that he was wearing a scowl on his face, but I could tell it wasn't directed at me since he didn't even notice I was next to him till I asked if we had time to go back to my place for a change of clothes.

"I'll cook us something to eat then," he offered.

"It's fine," I quickly said. "It's not like I'm dressed _that_ inappropriately, so let's just go eat."

"No, I'll cook," he insisted. And I knew I was doomed. "Why do you suddenly look like you want to kill yourself? I'll have you know that I'm a great cook!"

The problem wasn't that he couldn't cook—because he could. In fact, he was a great cook. My dilemma lay in the fact that Touya only cooked when in a reasonably unstable mental state—and I say _reasonably_ because he would prepare a feast that'll feed twenty people, expecting every last morsel to be devoured and snapping like a mad dog if the plates aren't licked clean, and argue that there's nothing wrong with him should anyone try asking what's bothering him.

I groaned inwardly and apologized to my stomach (and my weighing scale).

O—o—x—o—O

O—o—x—o—O

_He's going crazy_, I thought to myself as I looked through the bar window into the kitchen from the living room, watching my brother cook.

I'd never seen him acting like this before, so frantic and disorganized. He was all over the place; dropping utensils, almost cutting his fingers off, and burning himself. Not to mention the food looked like shit—like literally, shit. I didn't understand what was happening.

I just knew that if I didn't stop him soon, he was going to burn down my kitchen.

"Onii-chan?" I called out to him—very cautiously. "You can stop. We'll order a pizza or something, so just come out here and talk to me, _please_."

He let out a string of curses and threw some pots and pans into the sink in frustration. A moment later, he came out into the living room and joined me on the couch. Needless to say, it was one of the most awkward moments of my life.

We sat next to each other in complete and utter silence, except for the clock's ticking.

I stared at my hands, then my feet, then the wall, then the ceiling, then the front door, and then the T.V. Just as I was reaching for the remote off of the coffee table, Touya cleared his throat and said, "Nakuru has moved back to her old condo. Don't tell Mom and Dad."

"…What happened?"

"I don't know." He was laughing as he said this, like he truly didn't know what had happened himself. "I saw his number and then I heard his voice, and it's as if… Oh God, I don't know."

"So you just left Nee-san?"

"What kind of person do you think I am? Of course I didn't leave my _pregnant_ wife all by herself," he said, indignant that I would suggest such a thing. "I brought her along with me."

"Are you _stupid_!?" I yelled at him.

"I thought it was an honest and honorable thing to do! I only wanted to check on him as a friend and I wanted her to see that."

"What you needed to do was make up some stupid lie to go see him alone," I said. "I'm only _listening_ to you talk about it and I'm getting goosebumps from the obvious emotion in your voice. Can you imagine what Nee-san must've felt _watching_ you? Better yet, you shouldn't have gone to see him at all."

"I didn't think I would..." his words trailed off, his expression wistful. I heard the words loud and clear nevertheless. _I didn't think I would crumble at the sight of him_. "I love her, you know. She doesn't believe me, but I do love her."

"But you also loved—_love_ Yue. You still love him. You always have and always will love him. Isn't that right, Onii-chan?" I watched him for a minute—various emotions played on his face, almost like he was trying to fight off an inevitable truth he had known for years but refused to—_could not_ accept. "Why did you leave him?"

"What?"

"Why did you leave him?" I repeated. "From what I heard, it sounds like you had a relationship with Yue until five years ago. By the way, did Nee-san know?"

"She knew," he answered shortly. "My relationship with Yue actually ended ten years ago, a few months before I met Nakuru. What he and I had after that was, strictly speaking, an emotional attachment to each other—I was faithful to my wife, in case you were thinking otherwise."

"_Whaaat_? I would never think that of you! My big brother committing adultery!? What nonsense!" What he didn't know wouldn't kill him.

He didn't seem convinced though, but shrugged it off. He continued with his previous statement, "But that hadn't been good enough for Nakuru. She said that I would never be able to let him go as long as I kept seeing him, so I told him that I couldn't be his friend anymore. Actually, I lied—I was unfaithful to your sister once, a good-bye kiss if you want to call it that."

"It doesn't matter what _I_ call it," I said. "But I am curious to know what you call it."

He shook his head. "It doesn't matter anymore. But enough on my marriage, I'm not in such a wreck that I need to consult a couples therapy, let alone my little sister, for advice."

"Are you sure? I'm good at what I do," I said.

He scoffed with a roll of his eyes. "Apparently so."

"Meaning what exactly?"

"Meaning, you're so good at what you do," he said, "that you end up doing what you're not supposed to do."

"And what wasn't I supposed to do?"

"Why is the brat working as a stripper at your friend's nightclub?" he asked, all jokes aside.

I knew the subject of Syaoran and Yue was going to come up sooner or later, but I had preferred much, _much_ later as opposed to then and there.

"Dancer," I corrected him. "He's a dancer, not a stripper. I gave Naoko very strict instructions. And to answer your question, I really don't know why—he hasn't exactly given me an answer, so if you want to know why, you'll have to ask him yourself."

"Why did you let him then? You should have gone to Yue."

"Did you know there was bloodshed on the first day I sat down with them? If I'd gone tatter-telling to Yue who knows what might've happened."

"Then you should have told me."

"I should have," I agreed with him wholeheartedly. "But I was too worried about my own hide. I messed up, I know I did—but it's not like I did much, so in all honesty, things are almost exactly how you left them."

"_How_ exactly did you mess up?" Well, I had to hand it to my brother. Only he could ask a question so calmly and sound unbelievably threatening at the same time.

"Well," I said, standing up, and quickly pretended to pace the room as a ruse to put a good distance between myself and Touya. "In the heat of things, I accidentally fed their files into a shredder, and till recently, I've been under the impression that the two are lovers."

"So you've been trying to get them to see their feelings…"

"…uh-huh…?" I closed my eyes and waited for _it_.

Five—four—three—two—one—and—!

…Nothing…

No explosions? No curses?

Surely my brother was feeling ill. I opened one eye and looked at him—he was calm. Not like scary calm, but _actually_ calm. I watched him observantly.

"The brat suffers from a serious illness," he started saying. "You might call it an uncle complex. And Yue only has himself to blame for the mess he's in. I'd warned him years ago not to dote on the boy but he didn't listen, and now he's somewhere between hell and purgatory. That fool…"

"Onii-chan, you're losing me," I said. "So I wasn't _completely_ wrong with my assumptions?"

"Your facts were wrong, but your instincts were in the right direction."

"How is Yuichi tied into all of this?" I asked.

"I should probably start from the very beginning," said Touya. "The gaki's grandfather adopted Yue after his father passed away—"

"You can skip ahead," I interrupted. "I already know that much. I'd like to hear about Wei though. Why did Yue live with him and not the Li family if they adopted him? And what happened to the man? There weren't any other details on him aside from the record with the social worker."

He scowled at me. "And where did you get this record?"

I smiled sheepishly. "That's not important at all. You were saying before I rudely interrupted?"

Thankfully, Touya decided to let that matter slide and said instead, "Yue was under Wei's care. I suppose you can call him Yue's protector. Only Li Xueyou knows what happened to Wei."

"I thought he was arrested."

"He was brought in for questioning. Xueyou didn't want to pursue the matter."

"How could he not care that his _son_ had been—"

"It wasn't Wei."

Who would've thought three little words could make a person's head spin so much?

"Yue was adopted by Xueyou because he had no one else—his father was an orphan and his mother was disowned by her family for having an affair with his father and then leaving her husband, who is none other than Li Xueyou."

"Why would he adopt Yue?"

"Yue looked a lot like his mother when he was younger. I actually thought he was a girl dressed in a guy's uniform when I first met him." Touya let out a soft chuckle. "He was also very timid and a lot nicer back then too. Come to think of it… When _did_ he start changing? I can't remember. I think it started around—"

"Touya, please focus," I said before my brother could take a long walk down memory lane. "Back to Syaoran's grandfather."

"Oh, he's probably burning in hell as we speak."

"…so it was him then?"

"Yeah," Touya's voice was quiet, his body slumped against the couch, his feet propped on the coffee table. "Fortunately, the bastard died before he could…"

"The fire?"

"I should probably explain the relationships in the Li family. Xueyou and his wife only have one son, Li Jie. The father-and-son relationship was nonexistent—it was never there to begin with—and the mother-and-son one was as good as dead. Xueyou's second wife hated Yue, and she still does actually. Surprisingly, Jie treated Yue very brotherly—he could've done it to spite his mother, who knows. But the two were close, and Yue respected and admired Jie—loved him even." Touya's voice was strained as he spoke, particularly when he said Yue had loved his brother, so I knew we weren't talking about simple brotherly love. "Jie walked in on his father trying to force himself on Yue. By accident or intentionally, he killed the man. They set the body and house on fire to destroy the evidence."

"That's why Yue moved here?"

"Yes, to get away from the accusing eyes."

"…why Tomoeda?"

Touya shrugged his shoulders slightly. "I guess because he didn't know where else to go and Yoshiyuki was here, so why not. They were pen pals," he quickly added at the end before I could raise the question. "Jie came to visit Yue frequently, at least once a month, and he often brought the gaki with him."

"You met Syaoran when he was a little kid?! How was he? Was he precious? I bet he was so adorable!"

Touya grunted. "He was a brat."

"Pssh, of course you would say that. But it sounds like Yue's love was unrequited," I noted.

"It was eventually returned. Jie caught us kissing—"

"Save me the details," I quickly said.

"Jie wasn't a fair man," said Touya. "He was a great businessman—a very brilliant man in fact—but he only valued things that would benefit him in some way... And so he often forgot about the people who did not matter to him."

"Are you trying to explain his character to me? You can give it a rest if you are. I already know why he treated Yuichi—"

"If you would just stop interrupting me," he said with an annoyed look on his face, "you'll see that I'm trying to paint a picture so you can better understand the current situation. As I was saying, Jie found his own mother to be quite useless, and he did not hide his contempt for the woman. After his death, the lawyers found two wills—according to the first one, in the event of his death, everything goes to his son; the second one, however, states that custody of Syaoran goes to Yue, who will control the business and all assets until 'his son' turns 20. Everything was peachy when everyone thought Syaoran was the only son. The gaki's grandmother is arguing that Kazuki is the rightful heir."

"Why is she choosing Yuichi over Syaoran? I figure that she'd rather die than acknowledge the 'son of a common whore' as her flesh and blood."

"The brat calls her 'ugly witch'…to her face. I highly doubt _that_ relationship can be salvaged anymore."

Why wasn't I surprised to hear that? I could practically picture Syaoran saying '_Hey, ugly witch'_ to his grandmother.

"And there's more to it than that. The Li family, or _clan_ as they all call themselves, is very _unique_ and complicated. From what Yue tells me, the leader runs the clan but he has to answer to a bunch of old farts who make up the Elders."

"Yue actually uses the words 'old farts'?"

"Maybe it was the gaki who told me that… But anyway," he continued, "Some of the Elders aren't happy with Syaoran, but the more traditional and older members support him for his impeccable pedigree. It has been decided that a council meeting will be held in one year, in which time they will observe the gaki and determine if he is worthy of being head of the clan. But, of course, one year is too much time for those who do not support Syaoran and they can't take any chances, even if the brat is digging his own grave, so they've decided to get what they want through the legal system."

"Right now Syaoran isn't doing a very good job convincing anyone that he's leader material, huh?"

"He's practically sabotaging himself."

"Why?"

Touya shrugged. "Maybe he just doesn't care. But Yue does. When Jie passed away, he didn't leave for his son wealth beyond imaginable. He left behind a legacy. Jie had lived and breathed for the clan."

"By protecting Jie's legacy, Yue is preserving him."

"He hates all those people from the Li family, not to mention they're not particularly fond of him either," said Touya. "But he has been biting his tongue and bowing his head to those so-called Elders for the brat's sake. He's going as far as marrying into the Li family to gain his maternal family's good graces so they'd support Syaoran."

"W-Wait. He's marrying someone!?"

"Oh, right, you probably don't know about it. He did say they haven't announced the engagement so the press probably doesn't have that information yet. He's marrying Li Meiling, the gaki's first cousin. Nakuru was her mentor, and Tomoyo's husb—"

"I've met Meiling already," I said. My mind was still stuck on the _he's-marrying-Meiling _ part. "I thought she was in love with—she told me that she dislikes you because you stole the person she loves. I thought she was talking about…"

"What the heck were you assuming!? Meiling doesn't know about the relationship between Yue and Jie. She's under the impression that Yue is in love with me."

"Who else knows?"

"Just you and me."

"So Syaoran's mother didn't know about her husband's affairs at all? Did she even know about Yuichi and his mother?"

"I don't think she knew about Kazuki. But Yelan knew about Jie's affairs, she just assumed they were all one-night stands, and they were. Until Jie started a relationship with Yue, that is."

"Onii-chan, what aren't you telling me?" I asked.

He hesitated for a moment. "A few people, Meiling being one of them, know that Jie had a lover—they don't know who, but they know Yelan discovered the person's identity shortly before the _accident_," he said slowly. "The Li paid a substantial amount in hush money. They had to hire a fake witness saying that a reckless driver drove the couple's car off the road."

"Does Syaoran know?"

"If he does, he hasn't said anything about it. So I don't think he knows."

"You still haven't told me one thing, Onii-chan," I said. He looked at me curiously. "The relationship between Syaoran and Yue."

"Like I've said, the gaki suffers from a severe uncle complex and Yue loves the dead. I can't get any more straight to the point than that."

"How do you explain the whole—well, whatever the heck it was that I saw?"

"It was nothing more than an argument spinning out of control."

"An argument that ended with one of them bleeding out of their anus?"

Touya grimaced slightly. "Yeah, Yue was mumbling that he didn't use lubrication…"

"I…_seriously_ don't think that's the problem here."

"It was a dildo," he said. "He used a dildo to…you know… Yeah, you're right, nothing can make it sound any better. But what happened was they were fighting over the inheritance situation, and—long story short—Syaoran said he'd stoop as low as prostituting himself for a living rather than becoming the clan leader and Yue snapped. Their relationship takes a while to get used to."

"I'm pretty sure Yuichi wants Nee-san to represent him," I remarked quietly. "Nee-san has never lost, in case you aren't aware of how good she is."

"Knowing Nakuru, she will accept the job."

"Well, can't you persuade her not to?" I asked, the words flying out of my mouth before I could think about it. Touya looked at me with a weird expression I couldn't quite decipher.

"I can try—if I'm looking for a divorce, that is," he said earnestly. "I realized a long time ago that I can't do anything for those two. I told Meiling that when she came to me but she wanted me to try anyhow. It was hopeless from day one."

"So…that's it?"

"Unless every single person involved in this muck wants to come to my office and sit down for a cup of coffee, I'm not in a position to help them. I just don't have the time to dedicate myself to this…_project_." He stood up and stretched himself, with a smile that ended in a yawn, and said, "I should head back to the office."

"Oh. Do you need me to come in today?" I asked. "My couples retreat is this weekend so most of my sessions this week have been cancelled."

"Nah, don't worry about it. You're fired anyway."

"I'm _WHAT!?_"

O—o—x—o—O

-x-

O—o—x—o—O

"So, you see Father Reed," Sakura said at the conclusion of her tale, "I've been thinking a lot about fratricide, and I was wondering if God is willing to overlook and forgive the sin if I promise to spend the rest of my life in a convent making up for it."

The priest, an elderly man well into his late sixties, looked like he was about to pass out; whether because he had sat through an hour of Sakura's (_somewhat_ inappropriate) ranting or because he didn't know how to respond to her question, Sakura couldn't tell.

"Child," Father Reed said after finding his voice, "God loves you no matter what you have done."

"So it'll be okay if I kill Touya?"

"No, no—there is a difference between what you _have_ done and what you do," said Father Reed. "Please don't try to kill your brother."

_Crap_, thought Sakura, feeling somewhat disappointed. "Well," she said after a few minutes of pondering. "What if I _almost_ kill him?"

Father Reed gazed silently upon the ceiling, as if looking there for the answer he sought from God. Sakura wanted to tell him that looking up and waiting for the answer to fall from the sky didn't work. She should know. She was, after all, the queen of unanswered prayers.

It had been two months since Sakura's _dismissal_ and she hadn't been able to find another job. Her jerk-of-a-brother had made sure of that.

-x-

'_Like I said,' he had said when she demanded to know what he was playing at after her first job interview had gone horribly, horribly wrong because a certain someone had refused to give her a reference. 'I don't have the time to play middleman for Yue.'_

'_And I do?'_

_He had the audacity to say, 'Oh, right, because being unemployed makes you so busy.'_

'_I have to look for another job!'_

'_Who's telling you to find another job?'_

'_I have bills to pay, thank you very much.' Sakura snorted at him. 'God, Touya, why do you have to drag me back into the mess?'_

'_You still have feelings for him.' Touya didn't have to say a name. Sakura knew who he was referring to, and she saw exactly where his argument was going. 'You once wanted to move earth and heaven to make his life right again—'_

'_Do not go there,' Sakura warned him. She hated that trait in her brother—hated how he would go at whatever lengths necessary to achieve his goals. His relentlessness was both admirable and at times vexing. He could probably plot his way into becoming dictator of the world if he wanted to. 'I thought you hated Yuichi,' Sakura added._

_Touya shrugged nonchalantly. 'It's my duty as your brother to hate whoever you date. He may not be a _good_ person, but he's not exactly a horrible human being.'_

_Sakura laughed at his words, not believing what she was hearing. 'Would you really use my feelings to manipulate me into helping you?'_

'_When you say it like that, I sound like the biggest ass to ever walk the earth. I prefer to think of it as _strategic coercion_,' he said smoothly._

-x-

_Strategic coercion_, Sakura snorted softly to herself; she'd love to show him _coercion_.

The door opened and Touya's head suddenly appeared into view as if Sakura had conjured him there. He looked surprised to see her; after all, they hadn't seen or spoken to each other since their last meeting, which had ended with Sakura storming furiously out of his office and swearing to never speak to him again.

"What are you doing here?" he asked.

"What are _you_ doing here?" she retorted.

"Are you free, Father Reed?" Touya asked the priest, completely ignoring Sakura.

"If it's alright with you," Father Reed was looking at Sakura, "perhaps I can continue to ponder on your thoughts for a little while longer."

"That's fine," said Sakura. "I'll drop by another day. Thanks for listening, Father."

Said man smiled warmly at her, chuckling a little as he guided her from his desk to the door where Touya was standing. "It is always a pleasure to see you, Sakura."

If the old priest wasn't a man of God, Sakura could swear he was lying through his teeth.

Sakura didn't say a word to her brother even as she walked past him. She did, however, purposely bump her shoulder against his. Touya rolled his eyes at her, scoffing as he crossed his arms over his chest, almost like he was telling her to grow up, which, she had to admit, was already an item on her to-do list.

As she left, she heard Father Reed asking Touya how he could help him today. Sakura didn't have to wonder why Touya was there, she had a vague idea why. If her occasional phone calls with Nakuru were an indication of anything, it was that Touya had pretty much made his deathbed; so he was probably securing Father Reed for his funeral service.

'_It's not that I don't want to work it out with your brother,' Nakuru had said to her a couple of weeks ago. 'But you didn't see what I saw on that day—and I damn wish you would never have to, Sakura. It's not something one wishes to see on their husband's face at the sight of his reunion with an old lover. I just can't compete with that. I'm not like most women. I've always been more rational, logical, dependent, prideful, and aggressive than all my friends; while they're crying and whining their pretty little heads off over their marital problems, I prefer to grab my husband's balls and tell him how things will be done. Our marriage has been far better off than most and sure, Touya and I love each other but it's not the same. He can't give me the kind of love that I'm looking for and I am incapable to giving him the love that he desires. Your brother is trying so hard to convince me that there's nothing in the future for him and Yue, and that his feelings are long dead and gone, but I feel like he's trying to convince himself more than me. A few years back, I gave your brother an ultimatum out of jealousy that was fueled by my friends…I was wrong to do so…now I see my error, and I would like to fix it. Some moron once said if you love something, set it free…'_

Yeah, well, that person had probably been homeless, or they had never loved anything at all.

Why did everyone think love was about making sacrifices?

"So freaking frustrating," groaned Sakura as she stopped in front of Touya's car in the parking lot. She gave the front wheel a good kick before hopping onto the hood of the car and waited for her brother to come out.

Touya had a smug smile on his face when he saw Sakura waiting for him. Obviously he thought he had gotten his way with her. But little did he know that she was going to wipe that look right off his face. Sakura could almost taste the glorious feeling—_oh, big brother, one never goes to hell alone_.

"Took you long enough," Sakura said to him.

"How can I help you?"

"Don't play coy." Sakura jumped to her feet. "I have conditions however—only two though."

"Name them," he said.

"One, I still get paid, but since I'm not an _official_ employee, we can leave out the taxes and all those good stuffs. And two—" Sakura made sure to give him her sweetest smile. "—you will have to tell Mom and Dad about Yue."

-x-

Arghhh! Who needed sisters?

You take care of them and watch over them from when they were born, change their diapers, babysit them instead of going out with your friends, protect their virginity from the inevitable hordes of invasive, rapacious and greedy sons of bitches, and what do you get in return? A dagger in the back.

"Fuck," cursed Touya, leaning back into the driver's seat and throwing a hand over his eyes after watching Sakura depart in her car. Okay, so he somewhat deserved the blow dealt to him; he _did_ use underhanded methods to force his sister into doing something she didn't want to.

He would have to be a complete imbecile to not realize that Sakura desperately wanted to forget _him_. Hell—he knew all too well what it was like to have a constant reminder of one's past_…too well_.

Perhaps he was being selfish.

Because both he and Sakura wanted the same thing, but only one of them could have it—there was room for only one coward in the Kinomoto family. Fujitaka and Nadeshiko would have one foot in the grave if they were to find out both their children had the same illness. But at least they would see that Sakura could be cured; there was no cure for Touya.

Touya let out a low growl. He was about to get out of the car and go back into the church for another chat with Father Reed when his cellphone went off. He stared at the caller ID for a minute before answering, "Hell must be freezing over for you to call me on my cellphone."

"Where is he, Touya?" the woman on the other line asked calmly, but the threat in her voice was unmistakable. "I know that you were the last person to see him. Where is Yue?"

"Am I his keeper?" Touya retorted, equally coolly. "Have you tried putting a leash on him, Meiling? I happen to know that he rather likes leashes."

Said woman was stuttering and sputtering curses at him. Ruffling her feathers had always brought Touya pleasure.

"I'm serious, Touya—no one has seen or heard from him, his phone is turned off and there's no record of him leaving Hong Kong."

"Let him be. He'll come back when he wants to come back," said Touya and quickly hung up.

He let out a sigh and stared at his phone for a bit, waiting to see if Meiling would call him back. When it seemed like she had given up, he slowly scrolled down his contacts list until he found the name he was searching for. He waited for the line to pick up.

"Touya?"

"Hey, Wei," Touya said. "Can you put Yue on the phone?"

* * *

«—**to be continued**—»

**A/N**: Sorry this took so long to get out. I hit a major writer's block after my finals. It was awful—still is actually. Don't you guys just hate writer's block too? How do you guys deal with it? I just stop writing completely until I find inspiration again. Not a very good method, I know lols.

But anyways… Sorry if the sudden change in POV is weird and unconventional. You can think of the past ten chapters as a very, very long prologue and the _real_ story starts now—we're just now having fun, lovies ;) hehehe well, hopefully my writer's block will go away and I can see you guys again real soon. I'm crossing my fingers that the writing muse will bless me with inspirations XD

But I'm glad you all survived yet another end of the world (^_^)

P.S. If you like a little dark humor, watch Gridlock (Fait d'hiver) by Dirk Beliën on YouTube if you've never heard of it.


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